Jealousy and Bullying between twins

[twinmummy24]

Hey all,

was just after some advice really, i have 5 year old non id twin girls who are as different a chalk and cheese, i do everything i can to encourage these differences but also try to promote a good relationship between them

however one of the girls is becoming increasingly jealous of her sister and has started to bully her, particularly at school where i am not around to defuse the situation.
the jealousy stems from DT2 feeling that DT1 is better at school work than her, i have tried to overcome this by sepperating them at reading book and homework time and it did improve the situation for a while, i also make a conscious effort not to discuss the girls progress in front of them,

DT2 has lashed out and hit her sister a few times and is now actively stopping people from playing with her sister at school, she is also very negative about her sister and refuses point blank to say she loves her or to acknowledge it if her sister say's it to her,

just wondered if anyone else has experienced this before and if so is it fixable?

TIA
twinmummy

Erm .... me and my sister sound like that (We are 32 now ;)

I was academic she wasn't I always did better than her at 99% of the thing we did (i didnt mean to i was just v. competertive despite my parents asking that i let her win sometimes... i just didnt)

My parents sent us to differnt outside activities completley different - I did Judo my sister did Sea Cadets. We both did very well and would go to each others special days/compertitions to support the other one. It gave us somthing other than school to talk about as well.

Family ALWAYS compared us - she ALWAYS came off worse find somthign she is good at and praise praise praise for my sister it was art she was/is a much better drawer than me - and keep telling them just because they were born at the same time, dosnt mean they are the same!!! my mum always use to say she wishes we were born a year apart as it would be easier to explain to my sis why she was behind me in everything.

We rub along just fine now ;) good luck

I had this with my id boys, now in 11yrs. They still fight I'm afraid, but not as bad as they did when younger. They had several role reversals during the past few years, but have now settled into 2 distinct and totally different personalities. All i can say is that, tho they fight, (both with each other and with me!) they do love each other. I just thank God they are going to be seperated in High School, so won't be in direct competition anymore!

Also, its just as coffedaog says, find something each of them are good at and praise them to the hilt, one of mine is academic, the other is good at sport. Yes, people do compare them, but now they are now getting old enough to stand up for themselves!