reception aged twin girls, help please.

[twinmummy24]

wasn't really sure what the subject of this should be but just after anyone else's experiences.

my non id twin girls are 5 and started school last september, as we have gone through the process of settling them and started teaching key skills, letter recognition, reading and numbers etc it has become really obvious that the girls differ hugely in both their intrests and ability, DD1 (by 7mins!) is really eager to learn and enjoys practicing her new skills, will happily do her reading books and practice writing her name however her sister is not interested at all, she gets really upset and angry when asked to do any kind of school work at home, she also seems to be struggling to understand what the teachers are explaining to her, at their school they teach letters by saying, the letter a makes an ahh sound to write it your go around the apple and down the leaf, (hopefully you can imagin what i mean) so when you ask her what this letter is meaning a she says apple!!!
DD2 has ended up being placed in a different group for phonics than her sister as she is struggling, DD2 is really artistic and loves drawing etc.

i guess what i am asking is if any of you have experienced this and if so how do i support both girls without putting pressure on the one who is struggling,
it's so hard not to compare them, if they were a year apart and doing different things you would just put it down to them being different kids and work independently with them but having them in the same class is making it really hard not to compare!

I've no personal experience of twins but when you see the children in reception at our school you realise the wide variance of abilities the children have.I think you hit the nail on the head when you said "if they were a year apart and doing different things you would put it down to them being different kids" Twins are just individual different children who just happen to be born at the same time!! No 2 kids are going to have the same interests and or abilities in life. I've got one child who got an A in French but struggled to get a C in Maths. Her sister got an A in Maths but struggled to get a C in French Neither can understand each others passion for the subjects they excel at and conversely neither can understand why the other one can't get a handle on the other subject! We all compare our children in various ways whatever their age gap. They are very young and maybe things will sort themselves out soon. Ask the teacher for guidance but Sometimes a slower learner just "clicks" and they're off and running! So maybe don't concentrate on the things they can't do - celebrate and nurture the things they are individually good at! Good luck!

My id DT boys are in year one and we have this all the time. One is better than the other in some things, its the other way round for other parts of the curriculum. I make sure I do their homework separately so neither feels like they are competing. Its just natural I suppose that they find their own path and are different at different things. It is hard not to compare- especially at parents evening I find.

I don't have twin girls but I have boy / girl twins and my DD is a little bit like your DD1, my DS is like your DD2. One seems to "shine", the other seems to "struggle". You can't help but compare, its natural.

My twins are in Year 2 now and whilst there is still a difference, the gap is definitely much narrower. He excels at maths and sports, she is a bookworm / drama queen. I think they just have their own pace and interests.

So far (and this is only our experience, not foolproof by any stretch) we've made sure that we've done reading separately (if I'm on my own, DD can play whilst I read with DS and vice versa, if DH is home, we each read with one child) and if we've practised letters / numbers whatever, they each take it in turns to answer a question - i.e. they can't shout out (or else DD would end up answering all the questions). We have occasionally "played" them off against each other for a bit of healthy competition (that sounds awful but if we thought DS could do with a bit of motivation, or similarly if we thought DD was getting a bit cocky with it) but its a learning curve for us aswell.

I'm also a 39 yr old twin and my sister and I had different interests, although probably similar levels of ability, we showed it in different ways I guess.

I'm a twin,

my brother was always in the middle sets in primary, I was top
I passed 11+ and went to grammar school -he didn't

he's the one with the degree

all you can do is recognise their differences and treat them differently

celebrate their sucess and recognise when they may be feeling jealous of each other

I have boys and have the same problem. Not so much in reception, but by year 1 it was obvious there was a huge gap in ability. Mine are in year 3 now.

We always do homework, spellings and reading separately so that they don't really know what the other us doing. And we keep the end of year score/grades from them. My advice for homework is to set a time limit, 20 mins for reception is plenty. At the end of time just put it all away. Its really not worth the arguing and tears in reception.

I still haven't found the answer to not comparing though.

Oh and if one doesn't understand any Of the homework make sure you write a note to the teacher in the homework book.

My B/G twins are in reception. DS is doing better with phonics and getting higher level reading books and DD is getting a bit peeved about it. I thought she'd actually try a lot harder to keep up but she's actually going the other way with it and refusing to do much at home. On the other hand DS is getting fed up that he hasn't been superstar of the day or getting headmasters honours and all that, whereas DD has regularly. He know why though!

We've found separating them for homework helps. Any activity with them both there tends to deteriorate and we either get one winding the other one up, or 'helping' with balloon words and the like.

We have g/b twins in the same reception class. Dd is storming ahead and is very able, ds2 is holding his own and about middle ability in the class. He isn't bothered and likes to plod, dd wants to please everyone with her work & reading.

We do their homework and reading individually so it isn't so apparent to him how far she is stretching ahead. We also do things differently. Dd does her school work as if she is at school and ds2 we make things more of a game and mix it with a bit of play to encourage him more.

It is very hard to not compare them but we are trying our best