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Was excited but just read thread saying twins only become fun at 8 years old!!!!

26 replies

PrincessScrumpy · 09/02/2011 20:12

Please reassure me!

My dd1 was very hard work for the first 6 months (esp 4 months) as she had collic and reflux and only slept 2 hours at a time. I know twins will be hard but I want to enjoy them still. I read the other thread and it made me cry - hormones raging right now anyway.

Please tell me it is good too.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
PrincessScrumpy · 09/02/2011 20:13

Came to this topic for reassurance and it's kind of back fired.

OP posts:
surbybabies · 09/02/2011 20:26

Our twins are 21 months and are great! They're our only children, so I have nothing to really compare them to, but comparing them to friends' children they almost seem to be easier. I kept to a very regimented routine (and they were on 3 hourly feeds when they were born!) but they are such fun and I'm so glad I have twins rather than a singleton.

Don't get worried about it - there are plenty of good stories too, they just don't get posted so often!

myonlysunshine · 09/02/2011 20:26

Hi Princess. My dts became fun a lot earlier than eight! Yes, the first six months were really hard - they had colic and reflux and the two hours sleep at a time thing going too, and they were prem, so we were all pretty stressed.

But after about 4-6 months things got noticeably easier, after 18 months a LOT easier, then easier with every year that passed, honestly. And lots and lots of fun - with twins, I found lots of people notice and make a fuss, which is nice! And you've been through the small baby stage already, so you'll know what you are doing (I had no clue!)

myonlysunshine · 09/02/2011 20:27

agree with surby, eventually they are easier than singletons, because they entertain each other!

defineme · 09/02/2011 20:37

I had twins when ds1 was 21 months old. I found them easier than him tbh-you've had a baby already so you don't panic over stuff like with your first. I was led by ds1, but the twins were led by ds1's routine of playgroups then preschool, so they napped at the same time every day because we out at the same time every day. They breastfed at the same times in the day because they were asleep when we were out for the first 6 months-people used to forget I had them because they were in a pram in the corner (I had them in a single pram at first as they liked to cuddle up-so cute).

It was hard work for a couple of years because it was tiring and we were/are outnumbered, but you get your head down, get on with it and come out the other side with a fab family of ready made playmates.

ZuzuandZara · 09/02/2011 21:25

My twins are 1 year and 2 weeks old (!) and are flippin' gorgeous. They are funny, silly, giggly, clever and they entertain each other and us for hours.

First few months were hard, until they could focus and entertain themselves looking at dangly things in a bouncy chair or propped up, when they could sit they became easier.

I know its not 'easy' for everyone but our twins are the bloody bees knees.

I hope post helps you stay positive.

All the very best.

OpheliaBumps · 09/02/2011 21:57

aw Princess I'm sorry, I think the other thread was to let off a bit of steam, and we all focussed on the negatives.

Yes, the first 2-3 months are quite tough, as they need you for everything, feeding, entertaining etc. but then it does get easier.

My two are 18 months and they are lots of fun. They are the talk of the nursery, all of the staff love them as they chase each other round the room giggling and kissing, and entertain everyone with their antics Grin

We went to Pizza Express at the weekend & three families came over and commented how cute the twins are, as they were chattering and smiling at everyone - I was so proud!

faeriefruitcake · 10/02/2011 22:43

My Dt's are 2 and they are a riot, they have me in stitches all the time.

I love when they sit on my legs for cuddles, I love taking them places and watching the excitment as they find new things to break/poke/cuddle.

It's not easy but when we are all having a mass Mummy bundle on the floor I feel sorry for the people who have their babies one at a time.

MyFourGirls · 11/02/2011 17:35

hi there - my two are 9 weeks old today...yes i'm tired, yes it's hard work, but as you know so is one baby.

they are beautiful and amazing and as a lady told me yesterday in the doctor's surgery we are 'very blessed'

they spotted each other at the same time the other day and spent 10 minutes smiling, cooing and looking at each other with total recognition and love.

if things get better when they're 8 then they're going to be really amazing!

congratulations and welcome to the beginning of an amazing journey. Grin

barmbrack · 13/02/2011 11:23

Our Dts are 17 months ad they are fabulous. at 6 months it got easier, since a year it's got better and better!!

kathryn2804 · 15/02/2011 21:56

Well mine twins were great fun probably from 9 mths and they are now nearly 6 yrs old. Yes, they have their moments and it's hard, but one thing it is is fun!

The first month is a complet blur, Then I found it quite tricky til they started being able to do stuff. Then when they started crawling, it was whole lot of other problems but at least they would play!! We just baby-proofed the entire living room and it was fine Wink

18mths-2 was a bit tircky from the sharing point of view but they were incredibly cute with it.

the point I'm making is that there are good and bad points about all the phases they go through

Good luck and enjoy and ignore negative people!

londonlottie · 16/02/2011 07:10

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shhhgobacktosleep · 16/02/2011 07:45

My twins are almost 15 yrs old now and I can give you hope - it does get easier, much easier Smile and certainly with mine they settled immediately when starting school unlike the vast majority of the singletons in their class.

However, a word of caution for the onset of teenage years - it's like living with Kevin and Perry (even though they have no idea who K&P are lol) but it seemed to be short lived and once the hormones settled the world was a nice place again. It's also very reassuring when they start to go further than sometimes your maternal comfort zone would like that they have one another and when push comes to shove , they will watch out for one another far better than friends ever would.

I love my twins ( well I love all my children obviously) they were much harder work than our singletons initially and in all honesty I wouldn't want to do those years again, but they are special and on the tough days you just have to remember that it will get easier , new parents of singletons will, for years, be in awe at your ability to manage, and you're blessed Wink

Greedymonster · 18/02/2011 17:25

I'm not going to lie and say the first year was easy, it wasn't. But they were my first and I really think that the advantage of experience is worth an awful lot! You just know that 'it will pass'!!

Mine both had reflux, and it did make it more difficult (particularly as it took them both over an hour to feed each). But that time doesn't last long in the overall scheme of things.

They are now 4 and really good fun, we have had an absolutely fab day today and I am really not looking forward to loosing them to school in September!

They started getting enjoyable at a year and very much more fun at 18 months. Surprisingly I found the biggest step forward was when they started moving and then walking - they could keep themselves amused and there is so much more you can do with a walking child!

I would say the disadvantages of the hard work in the first year are paid back many-fold by the advantages going forward. I don't envy my friends with different age children at all, I would much rather have twins!

candleshoe · 18/02/2011 23:25

Ooops really sorry OP - I think that was my thread! If it helps it really was only total hell for the first four-five months!

Blush
hellswelshy · 20/02/2011 18:47

Dont feel disheartened! Wouldnt necessarily go back to the baby stage, but now they are 3 and for the last year they have been SO MUCH FUN!! They will make you laugh like nothing else, they are each others best friends and like someone else says here, i am slightly dreading them going to nursery soon as im going to miss them so much. We all have a moan now and then, but thats all mums not just twin mums, and you have got the experience of having a baby already - thats a great advantage. I had newborn twins at 30 and no prior baby experienceShock

It will be a ride of a lifetime!!!

Swazzee · 21/02/2011 14:48

I love my twins! They're 3 months old today and my first children.

I'm writing this on a computer in Algeria so I can testify that even travelling with twins is a joy! (In case you were wondering, 4 big suitcases, 2 small ones, 2 shoulder bags, me and DH with the twins in slings, 6 hours on an overnight coach and a 2.5 hour flight)

Sure I was knackered during the first month, and moving house when they were 5 weeks wasn't easy, but they're beautiful and smiley, and I still can't stop grinning every time I look at them (and this coming from a very unmaternal woman who never even wanted kids...)

plus they started sleeping 7 hour nights at only 8 weeks!

ok gotta go before the next power cut...

fourunderfour · 24/02/2011 01:34

We've got two sets of twins (DT1 and DT2 are 3 1/2, DT3 and DT4 are 5 months) and there's no point in pretending it isn't hard work! But both sets have been/are lovely and we wouldn't change it.

Some thoughts based on our experience that might help you:

  • essential to get their sleeping sorted out. This won't be popular with everyone, but strict routines have worked with both sets (DT3 and DT4 sleeping through by 10 weeks)
  • the early months are hardest in terms of drudgery (nappy changes, night feeds) but it does rapidly get easier. However, it often feels like one set of challenges replaces another. Our experience has been that first six months are about getting sleeping and feeding right, 1-2 years about crowd control!
  • biggest difference we've found is between 2 and 3. 2yo twins = unruly mob of big babies, 3yo twins = civilised human beings.
  • there are some pretty extreme logistical challenges associated with having two (or four!) very young children. It's very easy to end up feeling you can't go anywhere or do anything because managing two/four babies/toddlers in public is just too hard, particularly when you are on your own. But we've found that almost anything can be overcome and that other people are very willing to help with holding babies/lifting buggies/trapping errant toddler twins etc..
  • make time for yourself and DP or you will go stark staring mad, which will not help your babies!
HappyAsASandboy · 24/02/2011 08:09

Please stay excited :-) I have 4mo b/g twins and I am loving every minute of it. Well not actually every minute, but most if them! I am already finding myself looking back nostalgicly at the months that are gone forever, remembering that special noise one twin used to make but doesn't anymore, or looking at the tiny clothes they've outgrown. Logistically, life is very different to my singleton baby friends. I can't get in the local shop, so if I forget something I have to go back to tesco, I can't get in my bank, so have to do that at the weekend etc, but I also get twice as many cuddles, two totally different babies to watch growing up, and so much help and attention when I'm out :-)

You're going to love it. There really isn't any other option!

londonlottie · 24/02/2011 10:49

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Somethingwicked · 24/02/2011 21:14

I agree with lots of people saying it gets easier at eighteen months. It is starting to be fun for us all to be together (and out and about) as a family of 5 now (DH, me, DD1-3, DTs 19m), rather than feeling like an assault course or army challenge where you simply have to do or die (for example, changing 30 plus nappies in a day with 3 children under 2 with diarrhoea, getting up so many times in a night that you don't sleep at all, carrying a screaming child up a hill, with another one in a backpack and telling off the third who is also howling etc etc).

The flipside of life being so challenging is that when the challenges melt away you feel so ecstatic. The first time I walked out of the house with a twin holding each hand and my 3 year old holding on of their hands in a line (AND NO BUGGY) was just amazing. We were only walking 30m to our car, but still, even that short trip was so logistically complicated up until now. The first time I went upstairs to get dressed and left them all playing happily together was equally wonderful. On coming downstairs I realised that the older one had been teaching the twins how to remove plug protectors and plug in the hoover, but that's not the point!

And I echo what others have said that seeing them all play together is absolutely heavenly, and you feel that you are getting such a huge reward which you so thoroughly deserve after such a load of hard work. I also feel that their relatively hard start in life, having to settle for less cuddles/attention etc is also being repaid back to them in the form of playmates, social skills and stimulation.

Tonight for example, my DH and I sat and finished our supper (we all eat together at 6ish) whilst the three of them raced off to play a running and cuddling game (basically toddler rugby!) . We had a chat together, there was no one crying or needing changing or arguing or anything broken or tipped over to deal with, so we just enjoyed being together and watching our children for a few minutes. We are only just starting to experience that kind of thing regularly, and it feels so great. It's like we are now in a family which is a great place to be, rather than unpaid labourers in a never ending cycle of chores and jobs that always overlap and renew themselves.

tartiflette · 25/02/2011 09:23

Lovely lovely post somethingwicked Smile

OpheliaBumps · 25/02/2011 12:34

Somethingwicked my two play toddler rugby as well, it freaks the nursery staff out a bit though! I always call it wrestling, but it's toddler rugby from now on, I love that expression!

I know what you mean about walking them out of the house, it's incredibly satisfying to not have to get the buggy/carry them out to the car Grin

Gail55 · 25/02/2011 17:29

I have 10 month old boy/girl twins (my only children) and honestly, they are brilliant. I can't even imagine what having only one would be like..they play together all the time and follow each other around the room crawling and chasing each other. Last week I heard loud shrieks of delighted giggling behind me and when I turned to look they were standing on either side of an armchair and playing peekaboo with each other. When they are in side by side chairs one or other will put out an arm to touch the other, and they look so concerned when the other takes a fall. Although we still make sure we spend one-on-one time with each, and have play time with us, the way they play together really does give me lots of time to get on with other things in the same room.

I've probably been very lucky with sleeping, but they have generally slept through the night (teething nights aside) from about 10pm till 8am since they were 4 months old...and i suspect it's because they have the reassurance of being together (and I co-sleep with them too). Also we did baby led weaning with them which they took to brilliantly, so mealtimes have been fun and easy as they've had whatever we are having (we've got used to cooking without salt and chili now!)

Must admit I am looking forward to when I'll be able to say to them 'ok go and jump in your car seats', and they'll do it by themselves, instead of gong backwards and forwards carrying them..if anything has been hard it's the logistics of getting them around..eg just simple things like out to the garden. I've found an ergo-type back carrier to be brilliant though for that, and for when they are being a bit fractious, as the baby on my back almost always falls happily asleep, and I can give the other some attention.

Overall it's been so much easier than I expected and they are so much fun and it's getting more fun every week. Am starting to think that all babies should come in twos!

Swazzee · 25/02/2011 17:55

I'm loving this thread - hope you feel reassured now Princess

I was just saying to DH today (through happy sobs Blush) that it must be not nearly as nice having only one. We were all lying on the bed and DT1 was smiling sweetly at DH playing with DT2. Then they both reached out and touched hands (at 3 months old they still don't acknowledge each other very often so my heart melts every time they do). It certainly makes up for the 16 feeds and 20 nappy changes each day of the first few weeks.

DH has always said that having 2 is a blessing and I totally agree.