12 week scan and its twins !!!

[hippy3]

help

I had my 12 week scan yesterday and It has been discoverred I am having Identical twins. !! i am in totall shock. My DP is over the moon...I woke up at some ridiculous time this morning, panicking going..OMG how am I going to cope?

He is still haveing to work full time once they are born, we cant afford a live in nanny, I though Id be going back to work after six months, but honesty this isnt looking likely now. the cost of childcare for two kids will probably take up most of my wages. This daunts me a little bit, im well educated and dont get me wrong I cant wait to be a mum, but never thought it would be my career.

I might get slated for saying that but thats the way I feel at the moment. I love my job, I know I will love my kids but am scared by the thought of not earning my own cash and having a job to go too.

Also When they discovered I was having twins immediatley the midwives stated talking to us about the things that can go wrong, which has made me apprehensive as well. I was nervous about being pregnant anyway and now it seems that there are a million other things that can go wrong! and allready I feel totally protective about them.

I know I am ranting and I am probably still in shock please dont get me wrong we are so happy to be pregnant with twins, I have and amazing partner and good friends and family who will support me. I am lucky but at the moment scared s**ESS how am i going to cope with two? breast feeding? is that even possible with twins? sleeping? changing? etc.....

So any advice from you on here would be GREATLY appreciated. Sorry about the spelling mistakes its early in the morning. I couldnt sleep

lol...am about to do the same...! thank you..x

Congratulations and welcome to the club! I have identical twin girls who are now 2yrs and 9 months. It's hard, bl**dy hard, but to be honest I found the new baby bit easy as all they did was sleep and eat. I have also got 2 others so getting them ready and fed by the school runs, ballet, swimming etc was fun!!!!

Are you going to find out the sex?? I had 17 scans throughout my pg and didn't find out. I was convinced I was having boys lol. But it was fun going in to labour not knowing.

Yes there can be complications but the majority are fine as you will be really well monitored throughout. Most places will also want you to be induced at 37 weeks with id twins, but I bet your not even thinking that far ahead coz yr in shock!!

Anyway, congrats again and it's really special.

Poppyella

x

Congratulations!! I also found out I was having identical twins at my 12wk scan, and it was the biggest suprise of my life...I didnt once suspect that it would be the case, so I can sympathise with the shocked reaction. It takes a while to get used to, and amid everybodys delight and happiness, even though of course you are happy you also have to think of the practical things like money and how you will cope - I certainly did too.
Let me just say, YOU WILL COPE. It seems like it will be impossible at this stage, and I wont kid you that its easy, but you will cope and it will just happen that way because you are the mum and if you have a supportive partner and family then all the better! Dont be afraid to ask for help, and dont think you have to do it all alone as most people would be glad to help out if you ask.
Practical issues now. Look after yourself during your pregancy, and be alert to the fact that although the majority of twin pregnancies go without hitches, we twin mums are carrying two babies and with that alot more strain on the body. My pregnancy had complications due to the girls being identical; they developed twin to twin syndrome. I dont want to worry you, its a fairly rare condition, but please just make sure they monitor you closely and if you get bigger all of a sudden, insist they scan you and keep an eye on those babies. I found that I didnt have enough monitoring until they found something wrong, luckily they caught it in time, but if they had scanned me a few time before the 21st wk, the problem may have been less serious. Dont be scared, just be aware thats all;)
So much i could share with you, after being through it all myself but i dont want to bombard you with information at this early stage. If you need any other advice or help, give me a shout and I will definitely be happy to lend an ear:)
Let the shock sink in and then you will start to feel excited i promise! Good luck :)

Also theres a great twin book called having twins and how to cope, its very funny and makes you feel calmer after reading it. I have my old copy knocking about on my bookshelf, would be happy to send it to you!

hellwelshy thank you for all your advice. Mine are identical to. They have allready spoken to me about TTS and i am determined not to freak myself out about what can go wrong, although I have read about it. I am being scanned again at 16 weeks, then every two weeks after this. To be honest I am very excited, thiking how they will have a bond for life and to have them both together is actually very magical. And we are blessed, i know that.

But u are right it is when I think of the practical stuff. Like this morning I woke up and was thinking what happens if they are both crying at the same time and I cant get to the one quick enough, or I cant hold them both to soothe them...does this sound ridiculous?

We are going to find out what we are having which we werent going to do but after having the shock of twins we would like to be at least prepared for the sex... and its great as they are our first children ( and maybe last!) that we really do not mind. Am just delighted to have two !

also can any of u recommend any good web sites to buy things for twins on..and do i need a big moses basket when they are first born or can they go in a cot next too our bed???

thanks for all the tips... am starting to get excited.

Hellswelshy..how can I get that book posted
am I able to send u a private message on here? I would relaly apprecaite it and if you cant send it ill buy it. All the pregnancy books I have hardly mention twins.??
all tips are HUGELY appreciate at the moment..from anyone.x

Congratulations!

We had exactly the same feelings when we found out we were having (non-identical) twins. It took months to get used to the idea, but our babies are now 16 days old and, so far, it's not nearly as bad as we feared (although, as someone said, the early baby stage is not likely to be the most difficult). I am breastfeeding just fine and sleep is no worse than it was with one.

You will get lots of support on here, and it will be ok :)

phew...That is exactly what I wanted to hear mamachris

Congrats on your little ones.

Congratulations

I remember that just-found-out moment all too well. I have not quite 10 month old identical twin girls. I also have an older DS... and I absolutely ADORE being a twin mummy. That whole double trouble double joy thing - yup double trouble but the 'twin factor' makes it more than double joy... the dynamics and wonders of twins make it wonderful. And also there is very much an element of you can't do it all, and whatever you do is a massive achievement, so in many ways I think it takes the stress off. The reality is one baby will cry for a bit whilst you deal with the other, but it's not as stressful as it seems as an imaginary scenario as long as you remind yourself you have one pair of hands, and are giving them your best.

The pregnancy was hellish, no joke (for other reasons as well) but you are definitely in the right hands for monitoring if your next scan is 16 wks and then fortnightly. That is what I had - they picked up the TTTTS v early. DON'T google Twin-to-Twin but do go to TAMBA and to their forums. They have a 'sticky' about the care you should get for id twin pregnancies - it does sound like you're already booked in for that. They will likely recommend a CS at 36/37 weeks and really honestly, don't worry about that! There are very good reasons for suggesting a CS with id twins (well specifically monochorionic diamniotic), and from someone who has experienced labour and a crash section, I promise a planned section is actually quite a pleasurable birth experience!

Your twins will likely be weeney - we made do with one moses basket for about 8-10 weeks, but also we had them both in one cot. They definitely got comfort from each other (still do - sleep against the bars of their cots head to head), but some find their twins are better separated as they disturb each other.

Good luck - and welcome to the adventure

Also - when you are pregnant you will flip constantly between being excited and blessed to be carrying two, to sheer bloody pani at how you will cope. You WILL cope. And when they arrive we've found we have phases that are easier/harder - but nothing has come close to that fear of the unknown during pregnancy and sheer panic at what the bloody hell I would do with 2!

(eats words at nearly walking twins who like to trash my house on a daily basis and consider all things dangerous a challenge)

Hello again, well i dont know if you can send a private message but my yahoo id is [email protected] so if you want to message me and send me your address, i would be more than happy to send you the book - i read it a couple of times when i first found out about the girls and it really cheered me! Its a light relief with a bit of practical stuff thrown in too.
Re everything else; moses baskets i didnt use for long, as the girls went practically straight into cots, so definitely wouldnt buy new if youre on a budget. Depends on the amount of room you have in your bedroom;we simply didnt have the room for two cots, so the girls went into the nursery after 3weeks. As the nursery was only a few foot away, we just kept the both door open and it was just the same anyway. Health visitors couldnt tell you officially that was ok, but mine said you do what is best for you all, after all is said and done nobody knows whats best more than the parents i say!
Didnt want to bombard you with TTTS information, but just wanted you to be aware of it, as i really wasnt as my girls werent picked up as identical at the beginning. As long as you are aware, then thats the most important thing - knowledge is power after all!
Practical things, well you work things out as you go along i find. As my husband works shifts, i was really nervous when he was on nights thinking how will i cope with TWO BABIES in the middle of the night, but i just did, and they got used to waiting for their feed (i didnt breastfeed).Later on as they got a bit sturdier, i managed to feed them together amazingly. If they both cried at the same time, (which i find they didnt that often) then you just comfort the one whos most in need, ha ha!! Im not making light of it, i promise, but you will find a massive strength being a twin mum, and discover skills you didnt know you had, as im sure alot of twin mums will agree with.
As i say, lots to share with you, and happy to do so, so give me a shout if you need any more advice:)

Thank you, thank you thank you to all of you. Its funny, because everyone of my friends who has had a baby keeps saying you will have to breast feed, you need to get them into a routine form the word go..blah blah blah...and in my head im like its ok for you lot you had one baby to cope with, we have two !!!

Am totally into the idea now that the panic has settled a bit, my DP has been fantastic, as infact better than i am most of the time. Although when i do think of a lot of the practical stuff i do still have a mini panic attack, but i think id be having them even if it was one !

will be back on here...ive another scan in two weeks apparently, oh and my NT test came back and im very low risk..1 : 11,900 or some thing so thats one less thing to obsess about.

hi hippy3

Have replied to your other thread about buggies etc but just wanted to say congratulations and good luck!

My twins are 6 months now, they are fabulous and I am really proud of them (and of me as it happens). I am a career girl and not what I would call particularly maternal but that has stood me in good stead for what is a very challenging and practical new role!

I had a great pregnancy apart from the last 4 weeks when I was quite immobile, delivered them at 39 weeks and am still breastfeeding both of them twice a day. A supportive partner, like yours sounds, is incredibly valuable so make the most of him!

So good luck. Speak to other twin mummies, read up, and then just do what you think is right.

All the best

Hi Hippy
congratulations on your id twins,it not all doom and gloom.Browse twins uk and tamba then go to ebay.Where is your nearest twinsclub if you dont know i can browse tamba for you as I am a member.
Keep well
galaxy

Hi hippy,

I am due to have my identical twin girls 2 weeks today! Mumsnet had kept me sane with lots of support and great advice. I've had scans every 2 weeks and have had no TTS. Every pregnancy symptom under the sun sickness, heartburn, tiredness now getting carpal tunnel but I'm so excited !

In antenatal clubs there is a group called "Is anyone else expecting twins" join in x and congratulations x

Hi I have just tried to put a message on the above thread [ is any one else expecting twins} and its says its too big....?

I have been told today that ne twin is slightly bigger than the other, then what we will ahve to do if this continues... it is not TTS so am a bit fed up at the moment....

Dont know if thats normal with ID twins?

Shouldn't be a problem with it hippy, although I have a new phone and it keeps playing up on mumsnet threads.

try again i will bump for you. They is always a differnence in size with twins to a certain degree but you will be monitored closely with id twins so try not to worry. Which hospital are you at?

Your OP made me smile - the day I found out I was having twins was more exciting than the day they actually arrived (I'd been poorly, they were underweight, I'd been in hospital forever etc)

You will be monitored really closely, from 20 weeks I had scans every other week. One week I had to go to the hospital daily to check their heartbeats - work loved me.

It probably seems massively overwhelming now but don't worry, you will cope - you'll have no choice.

hi all had a 14 weeks scan today. And the one twin is slightly bigger than the other.

The one is at the higher end of the growth scale and the smaller one is in the middle.

It is not TTS i was checked by a sonographer and then a doctor.

Both are really active, and have the same amount of fluid around them in the amniotic sack, however one is smaller....

Is this normal with ID twins?

They have told me not to worry, but of course I am....!!

I am being scanned again in two weeks, and I know what to look out for for TTS. they satrted to tell me what we would have to do if the other twin stopped growing, what it could mean we would loose both of them. Was really really upset earlier but am just hoping that the two of them continue to grow and one might be more little.....

any advice.............? would be HUGELY appreciated {again...! lol...}

Hippy You just need to be as positive as possible, they have to tell you the risks and it's easy to focus on the scary bits.

I have just done it on a week by week basis. I wanted to get to 12 weeks, then 24 was my goal as it meant babies were viable, then I was looking for 30 weeks to give them a really good chance, then 34 and now I only have 2 weeks until my section. Fingers still crossed that all will go well

Good luck

lavita I forgot to say I am at Poole Hospital in Dorset.

Thye are pretty good I am being scanned every two weeks, and that is from twelve weeks... so shouldnt really give out. Am going to try to join that antenatal thread u recommended ... Thanks for the advice..