If you had a choice, 1 versus 2

[macfi]

We are having a frozen embryo cycle and have to make the one versus two choice.
I have a 18 month old DS and terrified of the thought of two together but would love two more children and know we wouldnt be able to afford it. I know it has no guarantees either way.
How bad can it actually be with twins?

I would have two embryos put in. Just to give you a better chance of having a successful implantation.
What ever happens you will cope with it. You'll always here about peoples struggles with twins but there has got to be a great deal of joy too. And after all its really only the first 3 years that a child needs really intensive care. If you get me! And in the long run that time will feel like nothing at all.
I wish you every success.

Hi Macfi,

My DD was 20months old when I had my B/G twins. They are 15 weeks old today. :)

As bumbums has said I would have two put in to give yourself a better chance.

As my twins are only 15weeks old I'm still a newbie at this but i am loving every second of it even when it is difficult at times. I wouldn't change a thing.

If you do have the blessing of having twins, you will cope, it's just a matter of finding a routine that suits you. As for money wise and cost, not found it too bad so far, i do a lot of bargain hunting and buy loads of stuff second hand.

I wish you all the best.

xxx

macfi
have 2, definitely!!
Not sure if this is true but i saw someone on "This Morning" who had twins with ivf that the embryos have a better chance if they are implanted in pairs.
Its never the right time financially im sure for most of us, but like Sophie2008 says second hand and bargains are a big help for us.
I have 6month b/g twins and i buy neutral sleepsuits,vests,joggers etc so they share most things.A friend kindly gives me her sons baby clothes to borrow, and if the first sleepsuit out of the cupboard is blue it goes on the first baby being changed-it doesnt matter!!
I also go to a couple of great charity shops and have clothes for up to 2 years old, because i forward buy i can be quite picky IYSWIM so have bought some lovely Next,Mothercare,Gap,Mamas and Papas for literally pennies.Also look in the sales, HandM had loads of kids stuff for £1.
Also we had soooo many clothes as gifts i didnt buy anything for first 4/5 months!
Good luck

I have twins and one other 18 months older.

The major cost of children is the lost earnings/childcare costs, and also bigger car.

Twins - very tough for the first few years - but after that I think I prefer it to having widely spaced children. Cost wise - they can share a lot of things - although it does mean you are hit with things like school trips, swimming lessons etc at the same time.

Thousands of people cope with twins (or more) - I think when you are on the inside it is nowhere near as bad as those on the outside imagine it to be. People saying their worst nightmare would be having twins are talking about the unknown.

by the way - my twins are 7.5 - the baby years seem a long time ago now.

Twins = short time pain for long term gain. First 2 years seemed impossibly difficult. Mine are now 4.5 and life couldn't be more brilliant!

Definitely 2 not 1. Better chance of success at all and if you have twins, as everyone says - the pain may be intense but the long term gain is the best ever. Our first year was horrible - really frazzled and shattered. And every year since has been bliss. They play together, joke together, stand up for each other, want to see the same films, do the same stuff on holiday. There's not much sibling rivalry as they are equals and no point in fighting as they are matched. I don't know how friends cope with kids of different ages - twins are so easy.

My boys are almost 9 months old, and no other children (apart from 2 dogs!) I love having twins, they ahve always been really good babies and eat and sleep at the same time etc. Now they play together and my friends with singleton babies the same age are always commenting that the twins are more developed. I think its because they always have company!
Good luck! Whatever life throws at you will be perfect for you! You just cope!

Probably too late to influence your choice, but can I just add a slightly different opinion? I made the decision to have a single embryo transfer as the risks in pregnancy with twins are so much higher. I suggest you look at that before making a choice.

However, I ended up having a day 2 transfer of the only 2 embryos that had made it that far and now have 16 month old twins who I adore! I wake in a cold sweat sometimes thinking I might have ended up with only one of them.