Advice on unaware racist comments

[ThomasTankEngine]

I am white and my DH is of Indian origin, both of us were born in the UK.
My friend has made a few comments:
"Once you've had black, you don't look back"
Talked about someone being "coloured" or 'foreign"
Made sweeping statements: "All Indian doctors have ..."

I would like to gently advise her not to say such things as they can be offensive, but not in a way thats telling her off.
So that the next time she says something I can be ready.

What can anyone suggest? I have 3 DCs and would like to help them deal with any comments without thinking.

How about saying 'please don't say that around me - I find your racist generalisations hugely offensive'?

Because she's my friend and I'd like to gently speak, educate her ignorance, not beat her with a stick, get her on the defensive.

Could you say in a sarcastic tone 'Ah, yes, culturally sensitive as always!'
Maybe she'd get the message through humour.

I like that idea n2t

I would suggest to her, gently, that you find such comments offensive next time she trots one out.

Tbh though, she is unlikely to change her mindset - bigoted people rarely do.

I was friends with someone when DH and I first got together - I had known her since we were both 8 years old. I'm white, DH is black, we're both British born. This 'friend' continued to make extremely offensive comments in front of me - she'd ask me, "yes he's black - but how black is he?", or say to her DH, "cor, you'd have a big problem if our DD went out with a nigger wouldn't you". So, 20+ years after our friendship started I realised actually this woman was a vile, racist bitch who I really didn't need to waste one more moment of my life on. That was 11 years ago and I have never spoken to her since.

In fact, all friends who have made such comments (e.g. blacks can't ski/swim/whatever, or once they get old, they just suddenly age, etc.) have slowly stopped being friends. I have no place in my life for them - there's enough shit that goes on without having to put up with it in your own home.

Sadly many other people throughout my life and that of my children will also be racist. Often unintentionally, and I'd like to have some key phrases prepared so I can reel them off when needed. And teach my children what is acceptable and what is not acceptable.

Though I hear what you're saying Rindercella re: this specific friend, she means no harm and I think will change with a gentle word. She can be feisty though and I hate confrontation, hence my gentle approach.