Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Multicultural families

Here's where to share your experience of raising a child or growing up in a multicultural family.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Mixed Race Hair

566 replies

KatieMac · 31/10/2004 15:57

If I start it here they can move it to the right place (If they decide to start a topic (& ever decide what to call it))

where do I start......

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Hurlyburly · 14/09/2007 13:32

Just in case anyone has been upset (as Easywriter was) by Mille's comments, we do think she/he is a troll:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/67/388281?rnd=1189773040006

claireybee · 14/09/2007 14:03

I also love my dd's hair fairly natural, and have no intention of pumping it full of chemicals in order to tame it BUT nor do i think it is fair to dd to leave her hair completely natural so that it gets all matted and then takes 10 times as long to comb out. I take it you wash your hair mille? and condition it? Also that you brush it. Well thats all i'm doing to my dd's hair, its just that she requires different products to me and so I'm asking advice from other mums to find out which products they would recommend.

Thanks for the advice Kama, I have tried leaving dd's hair 2 weeks without washing, but it does seem to be even drier and more difficult to comb this way, I've found once a week much better for us(also as she is very sweaty and so it stinks if i leave it longer lol). The blow drying only occurs VERY infrequently, mostly when she is overtired and needs to get to bed asap, also i never blow dry it completely, just a little bit mid natural dry to help speed things up.
I was using olive oil on dd's hair but got told off by an African hairdresser who told me this would be drying her hair out even more. I don't quite see how but thought she would know better than me so stoppped. I'd be more than happy to go back to using it rather than creams etc if that isnt the case. Am also a huge fan of coconut oil, especially for the dry ends (is also great for excema if anyone suffers...).

The pics should be in my profile, let me know if you cant access them

Mille · 17/09/2007 09:29

Clairebee,

Your daughter looks beautiful and her hair looks very similar to my daughter

To answer your question - yes of course I wash and condition my daughters hair and her hair does require different products from me. ( I use Redken shampoo and conditioners, twin packs from lookfantastic.com - usually good savings )

However, I think many people put lots of chemicals (often strong ones) in their kids hair every day to "tame it" - that is what I get very upset about. I do not want my daughter to grow up and think her hair is ugly and that she has to "maintain" and tame it. She needs to wash it and condition it like everyone else but I want her to be happy with it being big and curly if you see what I mean!

Easywriter · 17/09/2007 15:30

Your daughter is lovely Clairbee.

As it turns out it seems I got the wrong end of what Mille was saying.

I'm not a 'relax your childs hair' type. I just couldn't leave my childs hair without anything (hair products not relaxer).

Friends again?

Mille · 17/09/2007 18:48

No worries (it if is me you are reffering to? )

I should have explained better what i actually meant!

Mum2boys3 · 22/09/2007 17:01

Hello i have two mixed race children ds2 is 20 months with 4 inch curly soft hair all over and is geting a little afo the curls are big tho not tight ringlets. It is very fuzzy and i am wanting to make in look neater and tidier but i find what im using makes it greasy babylove leave in creme. any tips as it looks messy. I want to grow it so i can kanerow
Also on another note my dd3 is 11w and had very curly hair when wet but when it drys is straight when will her hair go curly. I was suprised how diffrent my two look as ds2 is olive skin and brown hair but dd3 is darker with black hair

chickenmama · 23/09/2007 21:43

Mum2boys3 - sorry I can't be of any help with the hair products but just wanted to reply to your comment on your ds3's hair... my dd is mixed race and her hair is still very straight. She's 16 months now and it's only just starting to curl up at the ends, tho it's pretty curly when it's wet. Some people are suprised my dd's father is black because her hair isn't what they expect. There's no saying just because your ds2 has curly hair that your baby son will too.

chickenmama · 23/09/2007 21:48

Mum2boys3 - sorry I can't be of any help with the hair products but just wanted to reply to your comment on your dd3's hair... my dd is mixed race and her hair is still very straight. She's 16 months now and it's only just starting to curl up at the ends, tho it's pretty curly when it's wet. Some people are suprised my dd's father is black because her hair isn't what they expect. There's no saying just because your ds2 has curly hair that your baby girl will too.

edited as I called your baby daughter a boy! sorry!

claireybee · 24/09/2007 17:13

With the babylove i find it is greasy if i apply it all over but not if i apply it only to the length (with extra on the ends) and not at all to the root. When dd was younger and her hair was in looser curls i found the johnsons kids detangling spray was enough but it no longer does the trick.

CountessDracula · 24/09/2007 17:20

My dd has amazingly curly mad very coarse hair, she is not mixed race but her hair is very similar. It goes into dreads all the time I spend half my life unpicking them.

The only think I have found that works and is very light is to only use conditioner, I use the aussie one usually or any for curly frizzy hair. Then I spray Modern Organic Products pear detangler here in and this leaves it soft and unfrizzy, detangles it (still plenty of picking). This means I only ahve to wash it once or twice a week (no shampoo) for it to look nice, before it just went into tangles in bed and she looked mad every morning.

Also I only wash first thing in teh morning otherwise if it is sligtly damp wehn going to bed it is a disaster!

franch · 24/09/2007 20:31

Didnt know this thread was still going. I was formerly femi when I posted below nearly 3 years ago, searching for answers - which I reckon I have now found.

The answer is the wonderful Elasta QP - especially their Recovery Oil Moisturizer - I get mine from www.beauty-rituals.co.uk/, altho I see they've none in stock at the moment - probably because I just bought 10 bottles I see others on this thread have made the same discovery.

My daily routine on my now 3.5yo's glorious mane (and her 2yo sister's) is: spray liberally with a water and olive oil mix; apply a huge blob of Elasta Recovery; comb through with wide-tooth comb. With the little one I then use a sharp tailcomb to do a parting then a bristle brush to smooth into bunches. DD1 prefers hers loose, which is harder work as it tangles more, but I'm not going to interfere with the enormous pride she has in what she calls her 'long' hair.

claireybee · 25/09/2007 12:22

So would you all agree that olive oil moisturises the hair? Dunno why that blimmin hairdresser told me I was drying out dd's hair by using it?!?

franch · 25/09/2007 17:00

What utter tosh clairey - olive oil is fab stuff - still in loads of moisturising products - been used for centuries hasn't it - you were right

Got the tip from this book, which I recommend

chickenmama · 25/09/2007 20:54

Franch - I have that book too and I also recommend it (tho sadly won't be able to try any of the styles on my dd's hair anytime soon as it's much too straight and silky!)

Bluestocking · 25/09/2007 20:59

I feel awful now, my DS's best friend is mixed race, and her hair is so soft and gorgeous that I do sometimes give it a little stroke. But I love to stroke my own boy's ultra-straight and silky hair too! Seriously, should I stop touching his little friend's hair?

franch · 25/09/2007 21:07

Don't know what others think but I wouldn't not touch it solely on the grounds that she's mixed race IYSWIM - I too am a hair-toucher, out of habit and pure affection for my own and others' kids. But go easy, don't make a big deal of it (though enthusing endlessly about the beauty of it is, in my book, definitely allowed ), and just be aware that there is a chance that she may - unlike your son, perhaps - be a little weary of that gesture and be unable to distinguish it from the well-intentioned curious mauling that she most likely receives on a daily basis ...

And don't feel bad

Bluestocking · 25/09/2007 21:11

Thanks Franch! Will definitely remember to tell her how nice her hair looks (it does, usually, thanks to her mum and dad's hard work!) and go easier on the mauling. I do tend to stroke kids' heads (the kids I'm close to, obviously, not random strangers) so it would feel very odd to avoid this particular little bonce.

claireybee · 26/09/2007 14:12

Thanks franch, tbh now i think about it she was probably telling me that to try and get me to buy her dark and lovely products!

Bluestocking · 27/09/2007 20:50

Franch, I think we need to see some pics of your DDs in all their coiffed and gorgeous glory.

mammya · 27/09/2007 23:38

Oh how nice to see this thread back up again after all this time!

Like many of you I have been trying lots of different products, and not happy about the products I can find in afro hair shops, as they tend to be full of chemicals.

One product that I found which contains mostly natural ingredients is Africa's Pride oil (or something like that), although it smells quite strong but not in an unpleasant way.

However I swear by Anita Grant's products which are all natural, organic and hand-made, and they smell gorgeous. Fantastic customer service as well! I particularly love this which I apply to my dd's dry or damp hair after shampooing with this. This leaves my dd's hair beautifully moisturised and not greasy at all. The pomade is also lovely, to define curls and and finish a style.

And for dry skins the whipped butters are fantastic.

She can make products to your specifications as well, for me she is working on a conditioner to help with wet-combing for nit-busting(don't let anybody tell you that mixed race people don't get headlice, it is not true at all! And very difficult to get rid of with all those curls...)

Can you tell I'm a fan? I swear I'm not getting paid to advertise her! I just love her products.

Another product I really like is a conditioner by GReen People, although it is pricy. But it is fantastic to detangle hair, my dd no longer screams like a banshee when I run a detangling comb through her locks after a shampoo. I think it's this one but not sure as they have changed their packaging.

I'm also keen to try some of the products you guys recommend, particularly that MOP conditioner.

And what about combs and brushes? What do you use?

Phew that's a long post!

drosophila · 27/09/2007 23:49

www.bizrate.co.uk/haircareproducts/oid378989809.html This is good but any leave in cnditioner or de tangler will do the trick.

claireybee · 28/09/2007 12:58

Those products look lovely mammya! Might have to invest once i've finished off the babylove. Do they smell as gorgeous as they sound?

mammya · 29/09/2007 00:14

Claireybee, they smell almost good enough to eat!

MarsLady · 29/09/2007 01:34

Quick hijack! Franch... I'm not on call or anything for the next couple of weeks. Shall we get together? I'd love to see the new (well not so new) house! But mostly I'd love to see you and the girls again. Might even force myself to bring the DTs if the house can cope!

franch · 01/10/2007 19:45

Hello Mars! Yes please - this week busy but maybe next?? Text me with some dates???

Swipe left for the next trending thread