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Multicultural families

Here's where to share your experience of raising a child or growing up in a multicultural family.

Original poster

Mongolian blue spot

26 replies

AliceKat2019 · 13/03/2019 17:32

I took my 11 week old for a routine weigh in at the clinic and the health visitor on duty noticed a little (very tiny blue mark on her arm) As she is mixed race and she's got a blue spot on her bottom, I knew this was Mongolian blue spot and I told her this and explained it was like a birth mark only sometimes these don't appear at birth, they can take a few weeks before they come through.
Anyway the HV on duty didn't believe me and said it looked like a bruise and it was protocol to inform social services. The same day social services came round and looked at her arm and looked at all her toys and where she sleeps etc and couldn't see how she would have got a bruise so high up on her arm. I am so protective of my child and it really upset me to think that they were thinking that I've harmed my child. The next day they accompanied me to see a GP at the hospital who instantly confirmed it was Mongolian blue spot and there was nothing to worry about.
I'm so angry that I had to go through all this stress, no one listened to or believed me. I know it's protocol but I really think it would be beneficial if HV's were medically trained so that they could tell bruises apart from birth marks especially on ethnic skin.
It's put me off going to take my child to see HV's to be weighed. I called my GP and they don't weigh babies at the surgery. Does anyone know where else I can take my baby, somewhere where they have a bit of medical knowledge and don't worry parents unnecessarily?

OP posts:
pinkmagic1 · 13/03/2019 21:09

I had a similar experience with the health visitor after the birth of my 2nd child.

After the birth of my first, it was the health visitor who told me what they were and recorded them in ds's red book. However when I had my dd it was a different health visitor and despite me telling her what the mark on dd's bottom was and the fact my ds was also born with them, she reported me to social sevices.

I was so upset and got an emergency appointment with my gp who gave the health visitor a talking to and sorted things with social services. I also put in a complaint on how the health visitor dealt with the situation. It was a time when I should have been enjoying the early days with my baby, not dealing with that crap.
Not sure if there is anywhere else you can get your baby weighed, but you can request a different health visitor, which is what I did.

Definitely agree that many need more training in identifying mongolian spots. I live in a big multicultural city too, not some rural back of beyond.

pinkmagic1 · 13/03/2019 21:12

Meant to say that my experience was over 12 years ago. Saddened to hear new parents are still having to go through this stress.

rainbowgrimm · 13/03/2019 21:24

Sorry for your experience Alice, I have a blue spot but don't obviously look like I'm from an associated ethnicity so had lots of suspicion of injury in child hood. My nephew also has one and my sister had comments from the HV at the weigh in clinic.
Has it been documented in your red book? She got the midwife to do it before she left hospital so she showed the HV where it had been documented and that was the end of it.
Safeguarding is important so I do think whilst it was awful for you to go through and could of been much better managed they did intervene with your child's best interests at heart. I'd get it officially documented then go back with your head held high.

Original poster
AliceKat2019 · 13/03/2019 21:56

Pinkmagic1, your situation sounds very much like mine. It's been a stressful couple of days which I've spent feeling really low to the point I've not wanted to play with my baby and feel like I've wasted hours worrying when I could have been spending that time with my child. If that happened to you 12 years ago, it just shows no improvements have been made in that time.
This might sound silly but how do I put in a complaint? Who do I write to / which website would be best to look at for that?

OP posts:
Original poster
AliceKat2019 · 13/03/2019 22:02

To look at my DD she is white with light brown hair so no one would think she's from an ethnic background unless they knew our family.
No, that's the thing, the GP never documented it in her red book. So now I feel like every new HV I see, I'm going to have to go through all of this again :( They never even looked at the blue spot properly and dismissed everything I was saying.
Do you think I should see the GP again and ask them to write something in dd's red book to prevent this happening again?

OP posts:
pinkmagic1 · 13/03/2019 22:04

I seem to recall that I wrote to the head of the local health visiting team. There is a large clinic near me where they are all based. Not sure what the situation is in your area? Maybe you could ask at your gp's surgery if you feel able. My gp was excellent once he found out what had happened.
It makes you wonder how many others have had yo go through this. Makes me so angry to this day

pinkmagic1 · 13/03/2019 22:06

Did the doctor at the hospital not write it in the book? I would definitely get it
documented.

endofthelinefinally · 13/03/2019 22:12

It is ridiculous that this is happening in this day and age.
Back in the 70s we documented all mongolian blue spots and birth marks in both maternal and baby records.
My own ds had a large mongolian blue spot. We photographed it and insisted it was documented before coming home from the hospital.
Inexcusable.

newmumwithquestions · 13/03/2019 23:04

Your story sounds really similar to mine. My daughter had a small bruise coloured birth mark. I’m not mixed race (it wasn’t blue spot) but another type of birth mark.
Long story short - midwife called it in to children’s services ‘just in case’ but said she didn’t think it was a bruise. Went for a second opinion at the GP who wasn’t sure what the mark was but reported he didn’t believe there was cause for concern. Children’s services stormed in. Spent hours at house. Threatened to take my daughter away (told me they would be taking her into care then and there if I wasn’t breastfeeding). Wouldn’t let us be alone with her. Wouldn’t let us sleep in the same room. She was 3 days old and was crying for me. I cried all night - I knew we hadn’t done anything but was terrified that we wouldn’t be able to prove it. Horrible horrible experience that I will never get over.
I’ll never forgive them and 4.5 years on i’m still angry about it.
It was cleared up when we eventually got a consultant paediatrician appointment who confirmed it was a birth mark. The only people who ‘get it’ were those that met children’s services. They weren’t just doing their job... they were doing it with zero sensitivity or care for what our baby needed.

I complained to PALS who were excellent and children’s services who were awful. Children’s services have made statements that conflict with both the GPs statement and the midwifes statement. In the end I got too angry and I had to drop it as I didn’t want it to take any more time away from me. PALS are the complaint body for the hospital trust, which also included midwives (even though the one I saw wasn’t at the hospital). They may cover the health visitors too ? If you google PALS at your birth hospital and call them (more info here www.nhs.uk/common-health-questions/nhs-services-and-treatments/what-is-pals-patient-advice-and-liaison-service/
then they should be able to help.

Sorry - that wasn’t short in the end! But because of my complaint the hospital rolled out training for midwives on when not to invoke the bruising protocol and took the case to the area safeguarding children’s board as an example of something that shouldn’t have happened. So it is worth complaining if you have the energy!

Enjoy your baby! It’s s special time.

Original poster
AliceKat2019 · 14/03/2019 09:00

Newmumwithquestions what you went through sounds horrendous! 3 days old! I wouldn't have coped at all with all that, that really would have broken me. I don't blame you for being so angry even now. I'm still ever so upset about what happened. I understand they have safeguarding procedures in place but if they'd just had a little bit more medical knowledge, they HV's could have saved us from all the trauma we've been through over a birth mark. I just wish they could have further training, I'm sure a short college course or something could help them do a better job. Thank you for the PALS link, I will look into that and look into writing to the head of the clinic where I live. I don't expect they'll do anything other than ignore me but it's worth a try.
The doctor I saw who confirmed it was blue spot was one at the hospital who social services took me to but I've booked an appointment with my GP (the earliest I could get was two weeks time cos they are always so busy) and I will get them to document her blue spot in her red book and I won't take her to be weighed until this has been done. It's really put me off taking her to be weighed now. I really don't want to have to see any HV. I feel so angry, upset and let down by them.

OP posts:
sofato5miles · 14/03/2019 09:02

I have one, and I v white and family alk seems to be going back 3 generationd.. Obvs a family secret lurking.

Original poster
AliceKat2019 · 14/03/2019 09:05

Nothing was documented at birth. I think they are so busy now, no matter whether you've just given birth or on any other ward, they are keen to get people in and out as soon as possible and things just get missed and it's now our job to prove that certain marks are birth marks and not injuries. Sad

OP posts:
Jellybean100 · 14/03/2019 09:06

It’s often very very difficult to tell a blue spot from a bruise. There is protocol for any marks on a child to be investigated. These protocols are put in place because as so very often we see in the media children slip through the net and end up harmed. It is a horrible situation for the parents but it is to protect the child

GiveMeSteam · 14/03/2019 09:06

I’d be angry too OP. I’m Caucasian and so are my children and yet I’ve heard of this type of birthmark, it’s outrageous that people who routinely work with babies have no idea of what it is and no interest in researching it.

Yes safeguarding is important but so are common sense and general knowledge!

GiveMeSteam · 14/03/2019 09:08

It’s often very very difficult to tell a blue spot from a bruise

I can understand that but then surely the protocol would be to say, “I’m so sorry, I’m not qualified to assess it and I’m required to refer you to a GP.” Not to act disbelieving.

SwayingInTime · 14/03/2019 09:09

I also can't believe this still happens. As per PP I examine babies at birth and document any birthmarks, especially MBS.

MayorPrentiss · 14/03/2019 09:09

DS has one - we are all white as far back as we know. The day he was born the doctor noticed, mentioned it can be an issue for the reasons you mentioned (especially as they're so rare in white babies) and noted it in the red book. Never had an issue since. Definitely get the GP to write a note in your red book that you can refer to, and please please don't feel you can't ask for help and reassurance when you need it. HVs are so hit and miss but they're supposed to be there to support you - try and take advantage of it if you can!

newmumwithquestions · 14/03/2019 23:08

AliceKat I really do understand your anger. I will just say that in our case our HV was one of the ‘good guys’. She was pretty horrified by what I told her and told me where to get hold of a copy of the bruising protocol that children’s services were supposed to have followed (they didn’t). It’s this that formed the basis for our complaint. But I do understand your apprehension about seeing the HV. It’s made me very very wary of safeguarding ‘professionals’. I also think the should be more training to recognise marks and better logging of marks at birth (though I know they’re not always there straight away).

Hope you get it logged in her red book and can relax about her weigh ins. I only know of the HVs doing them I’m afraid.

drspouse · 05/04/2019 21:31

My DD had one (she is BAME) and our HV made sure we told nursery as a local younger nursery worker had reported some parents after spotting some, let's hope the nursery improved training too.

JuliaAndJulia · 07/04/2019 22:53

Mine was covered in blue on her bottom, back & over parts of her arms. My GP gave me sound advise & asked me to photograph her regularly as 'evidence' of its origin.

Regardless of what else you do, please take photos & make sure they have time stamps.

ScreamScreamIceCream · 10/04/2019 08:05

OP unless it is a weighing you have to do simply don't bother.

When I took my daughter to be weighed at my clinic a couple of times the HV - a different one each time - said most parents don't bother to get their babies weighed regularly.

In my case I've stopped bothering as they don't measure their length. My daughter has really shot up after about 3 months she may be regarded as overweight when in fact she has grown a lot in height also. (I now looking at sleepsuits for babies over 12 months as she is out grown in height boys ones for 12 month olds.)

Oh any my daughter has pigmented patches on her bum that look like bruises if you don't realise such patches are normal on babies and people who aren't white. I still have them on my own bum and have since babyhood. (Anyone who is stupid enough to question me will end up seeing my arse. )

Original poster
AliceKat2019 · 10/04/2019 09:05

ScreamScreamIceCream I think you're right. Its not worth me going to see a them regularly. The only reason I go to the HV is for the weighing and that's more out of curiosity than anything else. They don't do the height. And they are useless for anything else.
I was probably expecting too much from them. They've probably never ever seen a mixed race baby before and I just expected they'd known things about babies of all colours and be able to help and advise but I guess I was wrong.

OP posts:
BlackCatSleeping · 10/04/2019 09:10

I can understand that but then surely the protocol would be to say, “I’m so sorry, I’m not qualified to assess it and I’m required to refer you to a GP.”

Isn't that what they did though? Confused

My son had a small MBS when he was born. It really did look a lot like a bruise.

Surely it's better that they check these things out?

drspouse · 10/04/2019 10:28

Surely it's better that they check these things out?

They SHOULD be aware of them as a matter of course. They should have learned about them, they should have done part of their training in an area where they will come across them regularly, and if not, someone should show them any they see in passing, so they can recognise them.

We were told about our DD's BMS by a doctor (spotted it at a newborn check. She was born in an area with a lot of mixed ethnicity so obviously that doctor was experienced.
Our area is more white, but when we told our HV DD had two BMS, the HV said "OK fine, make sure you tell nursery" as obviously she had heard of them and seen them.

It's like saying, I've never heard of this hereditary disease that this parent is telling me their child might have, so I won't believe them.
The correct answer is not "I don't believe you" but "I did that in my training though I've never seen it before".

Wasabiaddiction · 02/05/2019 07:12

Both mine had a MBS on their bottom. (Has now faded away. I don’t actually know when they lost it. I just noticed one day that it was no longer there).

Luckily I did not go through what others on this thread did. Childcare type people sometimes commented on it and I would just tell them what it was and suggest they google it.

Agree that all health professionals should have been educated about MBS in their training.