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Multicultural families

Here's where to share your experience of raising a child or growing up in a multicultural family.

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Original poster

In tears - Health visitor has reported me to social services as my DD has a mongolian blue spot!

80 replies

pinkmagic1 · 13/12/2006 14:46

My DS was born with his little bum covered in mongolian blue spots. The health visitor explained them to me and noted them in his red book to avoid future problems.
This morning a health visitor came to weigh my 4 week old DD. She asked me if DD had any birth marks so I mentioned the very small mongolian blue spot at the base of her spine. She then said she had to inform social services as it wasn't spotted at birth. I was discharged 6 hours after delivery so the baby doctor did not check DD, only the GP latter and in my opinion he didn't really do it that well.
The health visitor has just called to say social services have now been informed, I am in floods of tears and don't know where to turn.

OP posts:

ChristmasCaroligula · 13/12/2006 14:49

Where is his red book? There should be proof that it was noted at birth in that, surely?

busybusymum · 13/12/2006 14:50

Dont worry

my DS came out in bruise like birth marks all over 1 arm and just one on his leg. These didnt appear until he was 3/4 days old. Apparently they are just like the MBspots but cant be as they are above his waist!

Also my DD's "birth" mark came at 7 days old.

Original poster

pinkmagic1 · 13/12/2006 14:53

I have 2 children a DS and a DD. I was explaining how DS where documented and I have had no problems with him. The problem is with DD who is only 4 weeks old.

OP posts:

KezzaG · 13/12/2006 14:53

It sounds to me like the GP missed it, and that is in no way a reflection of you. Is it just standard procedure that they have to do this if something is not noted at birth?

I think being reported to social services in this case sounds a lot wrose than it actually is as you have done nothing wrong. I dont mean that to sound flippant, just reassuring. you obviously have nothing to hide as you pointed it out to the HV.

FrostyTheSnowMarsLady · 13/12/2006 14:56

Firstly.... don't worry!

Ok! Now personally I think that you should call whoever it is that is in charge of the health clinic and talk to them. Nothing can or will happen to you as it is a mongolian blue spot! They don't always appear immediately at birth. To be honest I don't remember the first time I noticed them on my children and they were pretty large!

If you get any come back from your HV or SS then let us know and I'm sure between us we can think of a way forward. BUT don't worry because it will become pretty obvious to the twits in charge what it is. I'm sure there are threads in the archive with links to mongolian blue spots so that you can bookmark them and show them to the relevant idiots!

Sorry... I'm so appalled that this still happens.

Kelly1978GotRunOverByAReindeer · 13/12/2006 14:57

Please don't panic. You have done nothing wrong, at worst they will ask you to take her to a gp so they can see it is a mongolian blue spot and then it will be documented. Chances are that nothing will be done at all. It must be some sort of standard procedure, and the hv should really have explained this rather than leaving you like this.

wrappingpaperBOwZZAndribbons · 13/12/2006 14:58

pinkmagic really do not worry. You are in the right as you spotted and pointed it out. Presumably your HV was just following procedure although it sounds as though she could have explained this to you a bit more thoroughly and sensitively. Do you think you might be a little bit hormonal about it? I remember being in floods over knicking DS's thumb when I cut his nails.

Also my DD was born at home so the duty doctor for the area came to give her a check and I thought he was rubbish.

Heathcliffscathy · 13/12/2006 14:59

me too mars. i was so lucky that my HV was chinese descent and therefore knew all about them (my dad is vietnamese, ds has a large one at base of spine).

FrostyTheSnowMarsLady · 13/12/2006 15:02

wrappingpaper.... sorry (I don't mean to sound rude). In which way is it standard procedure? I have had 5 children and no one anywhere has ever mentioned it as standard procedure. I have friends who are hvs and I've asked them what they do about them and they have never mentioned procedure! I also don't think it's hormonal to react about this because ignorant people (not you... I promise I mean this about people without information) have been known to interfere about mongolian blue spots. Believe me, I've argued with enough of them at swimming pools etc.

Sorry, this doesn't help you pinkmagic1. I don't think you need worry. I'm sure it will sort out. This has just ignited my fuse!

Kelly1978GotRunOverByAReindeer · 13/12/2006 15:06

I don't know if she meant standard procedure as in reporting mongolian blue spot. I thought it sounded liek the hv was following standard procedure for questionable marks, and since mongolian blue spots can look like bruises... I do think it is idiotic though that the hv didn't recognise what it was though, and can understand it makes people angry.

ds has a pinkish birthmark at the base of his spine that looks like a bruise too, and the number of times that I have been questioned on it in the past few months you wouldn't believe.

FrostyTheSnowMarsLady · 13/12/2006 15:09

It just ignites my rage kelly darling! I know that's not what she meant (probably) but I'm seeing red!

Sorry pinkmagic1!

wrappingpaperBOwZZAndribbons · 13/12/2006 15:11

Sorry. I think I misunderstood the first post. Having read others posts I have come to more of an understanding. I thought the HV was reporting it because it hadn't been checked at birth - as simple as that and I did think it was a slightly bizarre procedure which is why I wondered if pinkmagic was over reacting slightly. Now I am getting the impression that the HV mistakenly thinks it is a sign of abuse. And of course that does show a serious level of ignorance from a health professional. Which is why I hadn't originally believed this was the case.

pinkmagic I am sorry. I didn't mean to cause you further upset. Of course it is not hormonal to be upset about being suspected of abusing your newborn. It is natural. I hope you get it sorted out and can follow some of the advice on here.

wrappingpaperBOwZZAndribbons · 13/12/2006 15:12

Hope that clears it up a bit mars.

FrostyTheSnowMarsLady · 13/12/2006 15:12

wp.... I didn't mean to sound like I was getting at you. Just so so so so furious (could you guess?) that this still happens.

piximon · 13/12/2006 15:30

pinkmagic1 try not to worry. You have the proof that your son had the same thing.
My DS was also born with one. Nothing was noted down in his records but pediatrician who discharged us was at pains to point it out and told us not to let any HVs try to imply it was a bruise.

SantaGotStuckUpTheGreensleeve · 13/12/2006 15:34

God it's disgusting that this level of ignorance is still normal in the health service. The health visitor needs a boot up her arse (most of them do, IMO).

So sorry this is happening to you pinkmagic. The first weeks with a new baby are fraught and emotional enough without someone delivering a massive and unnecessary blow to your confidence.

I know it's easy to say, but keep calm - everything will be all right, honestly, it's a mistake that is commonly made and nobody is going to accuse you of anything.

I hope this doesn't spoil your enjoyment of your baby. This is precious time - don't let their incompetence mar it for you. Congratulations on your little girl. xxx

busybusymum · 13/12/2006 15:39

we had a problem that our families have no oriental connections at all and HV insisted we must have and even implied DH wasnt father. As, according to her its only occurs with oriental genes!

When she left she left behind a long black hair intention on the floor. yuck!

SantaGotStuckUpTheGreensleeve · 13/12/2006 15:40

busybusymum, she implied that? Really?

I'm speechless!

busybusymum · 13/12/2006 15:44

yeah she really did, I dont know the facts about MBspots but she said that they only happen with some trace of oriental genes. We explained that we have nothing as exciting as that in our histories, then she asked DH to make a cuppa and asked if DH was natural father?

busybusymum · 13/12/2006 15:46

TBH at the time we were more upset about the bloody hair extention, as in the half light of evening I thought was a snake and we were too scared to get any closer to find out!

SantaGotStuckUpTheGreensleeve · 13/12/2006 15:48

Where oh where do they find these people? Do they farm them, do you think, in big high-security complexes in remote moorland places?

tissy · 13/12/2006 15:54

if it's a bruise it will go away. If it's a blue spot it won't. Go to your GP and get it looked at and recorded officially. Then ask the GP to inform the HV that she over-reacted

Chandra · 13/12/2006 15:58

DS was born with the blue spot and it is not noted anywhere in his redbook. I think you should give a serious thought about complaining about the midwife who reported you (BIG TIME), I work with the NHS, she should now better and should be reported to get her inclusivity training up to date!

Very angry on your behalf

SantaGotStuckUpTheGreensleeve · 13/12/2006 16:01

Is that what they call it? "Inclusivity training"?

crappywappynamechangingwuss · 13/12/2006 16:03

Complain! my dd had a strawberry mark come up several days after her birth my midwife was brilliant and identified it straight away, found me info and consultant number. I would definitely complain about the way she has treated you and more importantly made you feel

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