Can I talk to someon about relaxing/texturing mixed race hair?

[KatyMac]

I keep being told to either relax or texturise DD's hair

She is nearly 13 & I guess we would like her hair to be easier to deal with; but would it help? or am I swopping one problem for another?

I really know nothing about it at all so any and all information would be welcomed

TIA

KatyMac

How did the hair wash go? I hope well.

They didn't use it

They were 'tired' & 'short of time'

Next week apparently

I think they like doing what they know iykwim & are a bit wary of something new

Oh ok! I am not trying any other hair products for a while as quite pleased with just going up to London to have someone else sort out the mess I created!

Keep me posted

I'm glad you didn't go down the relaxer route. As others have said, it does ruin your hair & requires a lot of maintenance/avoiding water, wind, etc. I'm black but my daughter's are mixed race. They have different hair types from each other & from me but Kinky Curly products work really well in their hair when I decide to leave their hair out (without braid/hair bobbles). They're expensive but the Knot Today & Curling Custard are brilliant. Follow their advice & the advice of others on youtube (there are lots of clips about Kinky Curly on there).

What is the difference between relaxing and texturing your hair? or is it the same thing?

Texturising is supposedly less harsh than relaxing, its not though as it still uses chemicals to change the hair.

With texturising you dont go for a bone straight look you get a looser curl ie more texture! than relaxed straight hair.

Katymac your daughter is beautiful, her hair is lovely too, im glad you didnt relax it!

Once you find a routine that works and shes had more practice it wont be as 'difficult' as it has been for you.

saw this amazing article on www.curlyellie.co.uk/?p=105.
To quote the author
" Why would you want your child to adopt a concept of “beauty” that is not based on the natural characteristics of their hair and is damaging to their scalp??"""

oh no! Why would you relax your daughter's hair? It's awful for their hair. There are plenty of things you can do for mixed race hair. I have three daughters myself with all different textures and lengths and though it takes a lot of work and research, i would never put a relaxer in it.

i also write a blog around mixed heritage parenting and I've asked a friend of mine to do a guest post about the danger of relaxers. I'll try to post it here after. otherwise you can google mixed.up.mama