Sign over mortgage/property?

[needtomoveon]

X and I are divorcing. I paid for most of our house (approx 75% of purchase price) but then my income dropped because of time out to have DCs (I did a lot of fixed term contract stuff so got no maternity pay ... or other benefits ) after DCs born (have now got a job with that sort of stuff again, finally ). X has agreed that I should keep the house (DCs home, amount I invested in it originally), plus he has just inherited his parents house so he has somewhere to live. We have been told that while he can claim a share of the sale of the house DCs and I occupy, I could also claim a similar share of his new place. The values are roughly the same. I don't want his ££ really other than maintenance for DCs and he doesn't want me to have to sell the marital home because of the upset for DCs who are little. So we have agreed to call it quits. How does it work in terms of actually signing the house over to me? I am already paying the mortgage and have done since he left last winter. Do we need to change the deeds etc? We are going through the mediation process soon but I wanted to work out what needed to be done in advance. TIA

Wouldn't you have got the house anyway, even if you hadn't paid for most of it?

It sounds like he's getting a very good deal from contributing very little- what does your solicitor say?

It sounds to me like the OP's children are getting a very good deal - each parent in a comfortable family house and parents who divorce amicably.

The deal sounds fair to me, but experts may disagree.

This solution was proposed by a mediation service worker - not us. No, I would only "get" the house if I could buy him out which I can't. It is a myth that women always get the house even if there are young kids involved. He came to marriage with no property, savings or anything really (yes, that should have got me thinking but there you go, hindsight is a wonderful thing). I want my kids to stay in their home and continue to go to their school and not to have any more upset than there has been already. I do think it is a good deal for him but I would rather walk away with enough to keep me and the DCs housed than go into a battle for more, which technically we might be entitled to but I really haven't got the stomach for it. I want a big thick line drawn under this marriage and a quick sort out of the finances. We are due to go back to mediation to get this all drawn up.

But shouldn't you each leave the marriage with what you came to it with plus a 50/50 split of assets gained during the union?

A reason divorced women end up in poverty later in life is often due to not asking/fighting for what was rightfully thiers upon divorce. It wont do your DCs any good in the long run for you to short change yourself now just to get it over with.

Well, technically the house was gained during the union as it was bought after we married. As far as I see it, he has effectively paid rent (and lower than any rent he would have got at market rates) for the duration of the marriage) and now he's left. He is very bad wtih money - totally irresponsible (one of the reasons for divorce). I don't feel entitled to his parents' money from his inheritance house. They didn't really like me that much and it was fairly mututal. this way, everyone gets to move on quickly. Getting our finances untangled is important so that the next time he runs up ££££ of debt, it is just his and nothing to do with me . I think he will probably sell his parents house and waste the lot not maximise the capital (he has done this in the past before meeting me) so don't begrudge him the opportunity to do that.