Help--I am in a BIG financial mess and don't know where to turn

[Arabica]

Sorry, this is going to be a bit long.
I've had my head in the sand for too long about finances--it's like I've only woken up now, when I realise there's a big crisis in the offing.
I'm self-employed and haven't taken any notice of financial stuff since my daughter was born 3.5 years ago. She has SN and I am not making excusesit's like I coped with everything else, all the medical stuff is in fantastic filed orderbut I went to sleep with regard to money things. I didn't file accounts last year and haven't made arrangements to do it yet this yearalthough I have the information and could work on it. I've only earned a pittance anywayprobably less than £5K.
DH is the same. He left it all to me but I didn't look at his financial stuff either. He earnes PAYE but used to do quite a lot of freelance so is still asked to file a tax return.
I'm scared to face up to all this--even writing this post is more than I have been able to do in 2 years. I suppose I kept thinking I would get a job and be able to get an accountant to sort me out. But that hasn't happened and I am terrified.
Thanks for reading. Any advice would be most welcome.

It's OK, try not to panic, it's all sortable. You need to pop to the CAB for some advice or find an accountant, some doa free initial first appointment. You would have got a £100 fine for not filing last years tax return, it's a flat fee I'm afraid, it's irrelevant whether you earned £1 or £10000. You can do your tax return online, you need to register to do this. Have you been recieving letters from the Inland Revenue about the fine/tax return?

If he's part PAYE then he still needs to fill in a tax return IIRC, there's a section oon the return for this.

OK. First of all, don't panic. Did you file tax returns before your daughter was born? When was the last one you filed? If you didn't, when was the first date you received work for self employment income that hasn't yet gone on a tax return?

First of all you need to work out how many returns you need to do, and sort things out into financial years. Then you need to ask for tax returns for those years to fill in. If you do not owe any tax (which you might not if your earnings are low) then there is no penalty for late returns for all years before 08/09.

The tax return for 08/09 (due 31 January 2010 - so about 2 weeks) will have a £100 penalty if you are late regardless of whether you owe tax - so prioritise and get that one done first.

Ask away if you need more info

I didn't do the one due last year ie 07/08, but was up to date until then.
I just feel so STUPID.
There is a special CAB debt service for parents with a child with SN in London. Am going to ring them.

OK, that really isn't so bad. Prioritise getting in the 08/09 one to avoid the £100 penalty if you absolutely can. Doesn't matter if you can't pay any tax due, just get the return in.

Register online today if possible - then you can file online, it may take a few days your password etc to reach you through the post.

Oh gosh, sorry to hear things have been bad -- have been wondering how you were.

Given that your earnings have been low, the amounts of money you owe will probably be pretty small, tbh. Have HMRC been sending you narky letters? I so know how you feel about going into total denial about tax-related matters, and I haven't even got your excuse.

My contacts with HMRC have been variable -- some people you speak to are actually pretty helpful and supportive, others can be quite aggressively pushy.

I reckon you can do one of two things -- phone HMRC and come clean, saying you're trying to get on top of things and see what they suggest. Alternatively, talk to an accountant and see what they suggest (although the last two weeks in January is not going to be a great time for a friendly supportive chat with any accountant, they're all putting in 52-hour days). Then you can approach HMRC from a position of knowing what you actually owe, which might help you in any ensuing negotiations.

I can recommend my accountant (reasonably local to you) if you want someone to talk you through it, but you might need to wait till Feb.

Do feel free to email me if you still have my address.

Thanks frogs. No, I don't have your email address any more and I would love to speak with your accountant. I have contacted one locally but I'd rather find one by personal recommendation. In the meantime I have plucked up courage and asked to be referred to the CAB's debt counselling service--there is a scheme for parents of children with disabilities (probably because lots of us have money prooblems!)
Frogs I'm at bergmann dot grainger at bt internet dotcom.

Will email you.