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Original poster

Coping on SMP - Er, How, Exactly?!

30 replies

Eadwacer · 14/01/2010 22:37

I would be so grateful for any views on coping financially with motherhood. My husband and I are trying for our first child, and rather naively I thought Maternity Pay was quite generous. I am horrified to discover how little SMP amounts to on a monthly basis, compared to my current wage. Since it is my monthly earnings that pay our rent, I am genuinely puzzled as to how we can keep a roof over our heads, unless I return to work after 6 weeks. Leaving aside the fact that this would presumably be a terrible emotional wrench, wouldn't this also be enormously expensive in terms of childcare?

I am new to Mumsnet (obviously, as I'm not a Mum!), and appreciate that this question must have been asked before. But advice/experience would be enormously appreciated.

Thanks!

OP posts:
SqueezyIsStartinAResolution · 14/01/2010 22:39

Bump.

shonaspurtle · 14/01/2010 22:41

You need to save up while you're still earning. Sorry, but unless your dp gets a higher-earning job it's the only way.

(obv there are various economies you can make the drop less problematic, but saving is basically key - remember to factor in Child Benefit & Child Tax Credit - www.entitledto.co.uk )

ClaireDeLoon · 14/01/2010 22:41

Save up for it? If you earn a great deal more than SMP as you say then I guess you have the spare money to save for a little while? Or can you rent in a cheaper area etc?

thisisyesterday · 14/01/2010 22:41

does your employer not offer any kind of maternity pay?

DuelingFanjo · 14/01/2010 22:46

I have a good job and an ok wage and I too wonder how I would cope. My mortgage isn't massive but I know once I drop to SMP what comes in for my 'wage' won't cover the whole mortgage. Me and DH will both have to cut down, massively I doubt I would be able to take a whole year's maternity leave.

Original poster
Eadwacer · 14/01/2010 22:53

Thanks so much for all this. You're right - I think perhaps trying to save the deficit for 3 or 4 months would be helpful.

Moving to a cheaper area would be possible but would also kill me (I am surrounded by friends and they are the only lifeline to coping with all this, I suspect). Also a cheaper area would be, um. Under a bridge somewhere...

@thisis - I am in a tricksy position viz contracts - at present I am working on a worst-case SMP scenario but I think I need a frank discussion with someone in HR!

@dueling - with any luck we'll be surprised at how massively we can cut back. Thank the good Lord my Mum taught me how to make scrap quilts, eh.

Ho hum...

OP posts:
Fleecy · 14/01/2010 22:54

We had the same problem - but we were surprised how much we saved while I was pregnant.

I felt shattered all the time, hardly left the house apart from going to work, didn't buy as many clothes as I usually do (although most people don't buy quite as many clothes as I do anyway ) and didn't go on holiday.

I then got made redundant - but that's a different story. Still here, still managing fine though!

You'll get a pregnancy grant to help towards the cost of your baby stuff so that should help. Our council pays part of the cost of buying washable nappies - using them will help keep your costs down. If you breastfeed, it's free. You'll get child benefit and working tax credit - I think basic is about £175 a month for those two?

Wonderstuff · 14/01/2010 22:56

When I got pg I went through our budget with a fine tooth comb, I reduced everything I could and started saving as much as I could. I was amazed at how much we could save tbh, we were able to afford for me to take 9 months off and go back part time - I am a teacher so am lucky that I can work part time and earn enough for childcare. I think menu planning saved me the most money, we used to waste so much food.

Wonderstuff · 14/01/2010 22:57

Oh yes child benefit and tax credits definitly kept the wolf from the door!

Original poster
Eadwacer · 14/01/2010 23:00

Thank you Wonder and Fleecy. I am beginning to feel less like chugging the brandy I got for my 30th (hasten to point out - not yet pg).

The problem with living in London is taht you can spend colossal amounts without turning a hair. I need to start staying in. Bloody Boris putting up bus fare by 20p doesn't help!

I have tried to work out how much you get for child benefit/tax credits, but I can't find a hypothetical calculator (it asks for non-existent information).

You are all being marvellous by the way. Especially considering everyone must keep asking all this!

OP posts:
butadream · 14/01/2010 23:01

Lots of people with mortgages get a mortgage holiday but I appreciate this is not available to you if you are renting.

Have you looked into the availability of any loans you could repay when back at work - tricky though as childcare costs are so great once you do go back to work?

My first ML was funded by saving the equivalent of monthly childcare for a year + my employer paid more than SMP anyway.

My second ML is being funded by profits of sale of our last home + again my employer pays more than SMP.

It is just all very very expensive.

The Health in Pregnancy grant is £190 (I think) by the way.

butadream · 14/01/2010 23:03

Also plenty of people ebay things like old party dresses that you will either not fit or have occasion to wear again until after they have gone out of fashion!

butadream · 14/01/2010 23:04

Could you look for a job with a more generous employer and wait to TTC for a little bit longer?

Wonderstuff · 14/01/2010 23:08

Tax credit is way too complicated to work out - seems to be beyond the inland revenue really. Child Benefit is £80 a month I think - Shadow chancellor was saying the tories would scrap it though! I did stop going out much when preggers and was way too tired to go out much when I had a newborn!

Basically when you decide that you have too much money, sleep and free time - have children, they will remedy the situation for you.

Original poster
Eadwacer · 14/01/2010 23:11

@butadream -

re. job: as it stands, my job is absurdly cushy, so I wouldn't leave it unless pushed - I just need to see if my dodgy contract status means I'll be on SMP, or whether I'll get more. the thing is, I am the first of my group of friends to want to start a family (oddly, given that I'm not especially young), and I did't even really know whether employers offered more than SMP. Absurd, isn't it: I do need to get more information sharpish.

As to waiting - I am not (as my mother keeps pointing out) getting any younger, and my husband is not getting any younger even more than me...

OP posts:
Original poster
Eadwacer · 14/01/2010 23:12

@butadream - re. too much money etc. - HAR! Exactly. I've spent the last 4 years saying the time wasn't right, and if I carry on like that I shall be 93 before we try...

OP posts:
Wonderstuff · 14/01/2010 23:14

There is never a good time, but you find a way to manage. I am expecting number 2, have no idea how we will afford it, but we will muddle along somehow.

Lotkinsgonecurly · 14/01/2010 23:19

Somewhere, online possibly on your company's intranet will be details of maternity policy.

Also, I too thought we wouldn't be able to cope but ended up having a year off( and then not going back but that's a different story).

However, we really cut back as soon as I was pg and it was amazing how much we didn't spend.

Don't put off ttc, you'll love kids.

HappyMummyOfOne · 15/01/2010 12:57

I only got SMP so saved enough to cover the deficit for 9 months off. As it was, I went back a little earlier than planned so that I could switch roles.

TBH I did spend more on maternity leave than usual as I could always find something to buy for DS and with formula, nappies, clothes etc it soon mounted up

mollythetortoise · 15/01/2010 14:27

I saved up for about a year, putting aside the money I guesstimated I would then need to spend on childcare once I went back to work (about £600 a month IIRC) so I'd get used to living on that lower income anyway. I then did the same when planning dc2.

You might find your employer has a more generous scheme than SMP.

I was actually better off for first 3 months of my maternity leave as I was on full pay plus getting CB plus not having any of the normal work expenses (tube fares etc) so I saved very hard those first 3 months and it covered the next 3 months.
I went back to work when my dd was 6 months.

saramoon · 15/01/2010 15:52

We got into debt as 1st pregnancy was unplanned(ish) and we were in the Middle East at the time. I came back here 5 months pregnant and DH got a job on a pretty low salary. I got a job too but of course there was no maternity pay. We had £100 a week from the government. Second pregnancy i was working but hadn't been there 2 years so not very well planned either. We got a loan to pay off the overdraft and creditcard and are still paying it off now and the dds are 3 and 5!

CMOTdibbler · 15/01/2010 15:58

I'd def agree with finding out how much childcare will be in your area, and then starting to save that much a month to fund your maternity leave.

MorrisZapp · 16/01/2010 19:36

Eadwacer, I have no advice for you but just wanted to say I'm in the same boat.

I'm older though - 38. On one hand, it's good, as we've got a manageable mortgage, DP is reliable type in decent job, we have nice amount of disposable income etc.

But on the other hand, I've got used to a lifestyle that I know we couldn't afford after having a kid. This has been a major factor in waiting this long to ttc.

Nobody ever regrets having kids, and nobody ever ends up in the poorhouse do they, they find ways of coping with reduced income.

But like you, I often find myself scratching my head and thinking 'but how?'.

I also have zero idea how they cope with the lack of sleep, or with school holidays when the kid is bigger, but again they must do or they'd stop having kids wouldn't they.

It's like a big, smoke shrouded mystery, the answers to which will remain elusive until we jump across the line and experience it for ourselves. It's a massive leap of faith though. I'm scared!

violethill · 16/01/2010 19:43

I hate to say it but...... at least it will prepare you for the realities of childcare costs!!

You've been given some good practical advice about saving up etc, but in all honesty it is tough financially when you have children. Many people manage by not taking the extended maternity leave. That's physically harder work for you, but from a developmental point of view probably easier for the child, as around one year old is probably the worst time to start leaving them. When I had my first (many moons ago!) maximum ML was 6 months, but in fact it was very much the norm for mums to return after 3 months, as the last 3 months were unpaid and this was in the days of sky-high interest rates. I think probably for you, because so many women these days seem to take a year off, it maybe seems more of a wrench?

Sorry if this sounds negative, but the reality is that childcare costs will eat up a lot of your income anyway, and if you have more than one pre-schooler you'll be lucky to see any net gain.

It all gets better once they're in school though, and you get the bulk of the day free.

And then they leave school and go to Uni and you're poor again

ruddynorah · 16/01/2010 19:45

child benefit is £80 a month for the first child

tax credits if your joint income is over £22k ish but under £60k ish is the basic £45 a month, but with a baby under 1yr old you get an additional £45 a month.

i also supplement the smp/unpaid leave with mystery shopping, easy to do with a baby in tow! oh, and i ebay everything..baby clothes, maternity clothes, baby toys etc.