how much maintenance is reasonable?

[stripeyshirt]

i am about to separate from my husband, have 2yo. currently live outwith uk, will be returning to uk to live. we have to discuss amount of maintenance and child support i am to receive...how long is a piece of string? anyone got any advice please as to costs of living, things i shouldn't forget etc??

I don't know if this is of any use because it isn't something I have personally experienced...but a friend split from her Canadian partner some years ago. They had one child. The partner remained in Canada and my friend returned to GB. The partner was extremely wealthy and the child was, and still is, scuttled back and forth from canada in the school hols. The split was very bitter and everything went to court. the rule of thumb that the judge used to determine maintenance levels was that the childs standard of living with one parent should not be considerably worse off with one parent than with the other. My friend was a very low earner and worked very part time to look after her child. The father is exceptionally wealthy and was made to buy a house for my friend and her child to live in until the child is 18, cover all living costs, cover all travelling costs (to canada and bcak including accompaniement either by the mother or another adult), cover a holiday each year, school uniform, school fees, shoes, clothes, sports equipment ...even hair cuts were itemised. With a small child I would factor in childcare (expensive) if you are going to work,, or at least baby sitting costs if you aren't going to work. Good luck.

that's a good rule of thumb...

main concern is of course housing. he owns two houses, i'll be heading home to mother's house for a while. i'll be working at some point, but not yet. can my hand almost be forced to work? we had agreed before married that i would not work in the early years. i hope we can manage to get this done in an amicable fashion...

My friends partner..not husband, (therefore she was at a disadvantage to you), tried to pursuade the judge that the mother wasn't maximising her income by working part time, in order to try to get him to stump up more maintenance. Fortunately the judge was very wise and pointed out that it was not helping the partner's case to try to deny his own child parental input, that my friend had clearly given up work to look after the child on behalf of both of them...and anyway the cost of a full time nanny in London would be ...ooohh about £30k per annum which would be costed to the partner should he wish to pursue that line of inquiry!....he back tracked rapidly.

hey thanks again, really helpful