if you live with someone

[bettybooo]

and you both have your own properties and are both working but your OH has moved in with you and rents his own property out....

How much of a financial contribution does your OH pay towards your mortgage?

Do you split it 50/50?

Anyone ?

If he's renting his own place out then he is benefiting financially. Presumably, therefore, he is living rent-free with you?

I would expect anyone living with me to be paying rent.

I'd say should be 50/50

OK, thanks LadyOfRoffle Will wait for more replies before I decide if I am mad.

Are you arguing about it then?

What are your expectations/thoughts?

Up until recently his whole mortgage was covered by the tenant. It's complicated.

When I first met DH, I had my own place and he moved in with me very quickly . Perhaps not surprisingly as he lived in a shithole rented flat in Croydon!

But it was a very intense, obviously serious relationship, so the minute he moved in we shared all the bills, including the mortgage.

However, we bought a place together not long afterwards, so that we had both our names on the mortgage. I imagine that it could get complicated at some stage if one of you has been contributing towards a mortgage but doesn't have your name on that mortgage.

I'd charge going rent for my area of 50% if rent was more than double my mortgage IYSWIM?

But only if his tenant paid enough to cover his whole mortgage repayments. Otherwise he is living scott free at your expense!

I had similar situation to BecauseImWorthIt - it was a serious relationship, and my then-dp contributed towards bills and, when I bought first place (he was still studying/getting on career ladder)he gave some small amount to the mortgage. If you do charge rent informally - ie, he makes contributions each month but without rental contract etc - then, should things go awry and the relationship split up he could claim equity in your home.

Whether I charged anything would depend how much my partner was earning and whether the rent on his flat covered the outgoings on it.

Ok - the old tenant covered the whole mortgage. The new one is a mate so he's basically paying less than the mortgage. My OH is paying the rest. BUT - he was only paying 1/3 of the mortgage here even when his previous tenant was there.

He's pissed off because I brought that up and said I was feeling resentful that he's basicay living cheaper than a student.

But I don't want him on the mortgage, and he has never asked to be put on it. He says because he has no financial interest in my house he shouldn't pay half.

I think I am a fool for letting it go on so long. I am ok about it staying the same now his Mat is there but he's (my OH) having a massive sulk because he 'feels hurt' that I made an issue of it.

He hasn't spoken to me for about 4 hours. But I personally don't think I was beingunreasonable to bring up that I feel a bit resentful about it! So I don't think I deserve the cold shoulder. HRMPH.

Was just checking that I am not nuts.

If he is contributing to the mortgage, he CAN claim a financial interest in your property, should he choose to do so in the future, whether he is named on the mortgage/title deed or not.

Put it on a formal footing. Have a rental agreement. You can earn £4,250 (iirc?) per annum tax free under the government's rent a room scheme. There is no way he can claim an interest in your property if he is a tenant. It is quite reasonable for him to also pay you half of the bills.

thanks.

I am happy to accept that because he has no financial interest in the house that he shouldn't pay half but the upset it has caused him seems huge. We are supposed to be getting married. Will marriage automatically make him a half owner and once we do get married should I ask for half?

I would say that it should not be about the mortgage as such. Rather, you should be working outwhat costs you both have and an equitable way to pay them so that neither of you are hard done by. If he is simply paying a small rent and living cheaply, the you don't really have a live in partner, you have a housemate.

Why not work out outgoings, including both houses, and then agree what is appropriape based on all expenses, income etc?

And YANBU to want to discuss it - resentment can build ip to epic proportions.

Maybe I should put this in relationships

He pays half of all the bills.

I came out of a relationship where money matters were pretty straightforward in that everything was split equally as we were both on the mortgage. With this relationship my OH moved in with me pretty much after I bought my house but I didn't ask for half the mortgage as he was still paying the mortgage on his flat and hadn't rented it out yet.

Now that has changed I guess occassionally I have felt a bit resentful about the money thing. We keep our money separately and are both free to spend the surplus on whatever we want. He pays what he owes me on time every month.

We earn pretty much the same salary but he does other stuff outside of work which means he brings in more than me. Maybe we need to set up a joint account to pay for things like food etc.

He is really upset because he says I have basically accused him of ripping me off which was not my intention at all. I think introducing a rent book would be a bad idea right now but maybe I should think about it in the future.

Sounds like you should have a calm and rational conversation about finances before you get married!

There's no right or wrong way to do things when you're married, IMO, but I think you do need to discuss it as you may find that you have very different expectations about the way in which you plan to manage things.

When you are married, will the house be where you stay or are you planning to buy somewhere else again? If you're staying there, then he should certainly be paying half, but I think you should also think about getting his name on the mortgage as well.

Or do you want to preserve it as 'yours'? Your OH may think that this is the case, and could be upset about this.