should I take legal action? false allegations....

[mybumpsaboy]

Hi,
basically...I've recently discovered that my ex's mum has filed a letter with my doctors, claiming that I'm mentally unstable & she has concerns for the welfare of my unborn baby with her son. She based this conclusion around a load of lies - claiming she'd witnessed me having moodswings/crying a lot/putting on a 'front' etc when in fact I've NEVER so much as cried around the woman, even after myself & ex split (as a result of his affair with a teenager)...she is claiming herself as firsthand 'witness' to events which could only have come from her son, & with gross exaggeration. Plus she actually makes a few complete outright lies...such as claiming she's witnessed me have a 3 hour tantrum crying on the floor: absolute unfounded rubbish. She also casts doubt on the baby's paternity saying 'I'm led to believe this will be my grandchild....'

What do I do??? I HAD wanted things to all be amicable. Only saw this letter by accident on my file or would NEVER have suspected her of being so underhand. Ex clearly knew too, to give her my docs address.

As a result of all this I was called in for psychiatric assessment. They've assessed me as fine. Do I just drop it now or take action?? My concern is that I'm being set up for a future court battle with the baby, despite ex's claims that he has no intentions of such. I also am not at all happy about a woman being in my child's life, grandma or not, who is obviously prepared to lie & badmouth about me.

Help, please!!!

have had to read this a few times to understand what she had done. what an EVIL witch!
well firstly, she has no automatic right to be in your child's life and if you are not married to her son, neither will he. Think very carefully as to whether you want to put your ex on the birth certificate as the baby's father. If you do, he will automatically have parental responsibility and will be able to apply to the Court for a Contact Order (or from what you say you seem to think there may be a court battle so perhaps even residence?)PLEASE try not to worry as this is the last thing that you need when you are pregnant. Even if he had parental responsibility and applied to the Courts, they are not just going to hand your baby over to him.
I'm amazed that the doctors have had you assessed on the basis of a letter from a crazy woman. I would write a strong letter to the practice manager and demand an explanation. I would also consider taking legal action against the old hag but again, you don't really want to be worrying about things when you are pregnant and a court case would be stressful. Perhaps, you could instruct a solicitor to write formal letters to the doctors and the old hag and with regards to her, make it clear that she should cease this behaviour immediately or you will consider legal action. Hopefully this will be enough. I agree with dittany that you could/should ask for the letter to be removed, however, as you have been assessed as being absolutely fine, that may perhaps count in your favour if the old hag should be silly enough to make an court applications (via her son as she has no rights without permission from the Court) in the future. Good luck and please try not to worry.

Am amazed you where sent for a psychiatric evaluation on the basis of a poison pen letter.

What an evil witch your exh's mum is.

Demand the GP removes the letter from your file. Also, ask GP why he gave credence to it.

Message withdrawn

I know....having got over the initial shock, I suppose it IS a good thing that they look into stuff like this...but they should really do it with an 'innocent until proven guilty' attitude!!!

I will indeed take all your advice, thank you. It's just so hideous.

I'm still v much hoping my ex doesn't know the extent of what's been sad. For all his (countless!) faults lol, I do know that he's told his family to stop pushing him to go to a solicitor when me & him had been getting on OK atm.

But it just sucks that right from the word go I know half of my baby's blood relations would do that to me :s

Jesus H Christ, well it may be a shock, and absolutely a ridiculous situation, but you have been given a good heads up what this woman is like, and how to handle the situation of her and you dc when he arrives!

Forewarned is forearmed, take it as a kind of blessing, she has shown her cards very early, now you prepare yourself, deal with her through solicitors, as you should your ex if he has any idea about any of this.

Be strong, and seek legal advice asap,let them deal with this toxic witch !

Definitely see a solicitor and do it asap, perhaps talk to CAB and get in touch with legal aid. Dittany is right about the libel.

The very frightening thing is that it is her word against yours and in this sometimes topsy turvy world, even with a psychiatric assessment in your favour, who's to say that if she is this vindictive, she may at some point be able to convince someone.

Yes it is a very stressful thing to threaten legal action but far more stressful to have this hanging over you. You need the detail of that letter in front of you do you have a copy of the letter? You need to write down a rebuttal of everything she claims. Check your diary for proof of things for example, did you even see her on the day she claims you had this mahoosive tantrum?

Deal with it but don't fret about it. IMO hoping for the best would be the worst thing you could do. Or rather hope for the best but prepare for the worst.

I am gobsmacked that someone is capable of this, what a horrific thing to do!

What a cruel woman to put you under stress like that when you are pregnant and going through the breakup of your relationship.

You should certainly speak to a solicitor and make very sure you have no more contact with her.

Bluesky is right - get a copy of that letter and then demand it is removed from your medical file.

She sounds like a toxic old bitch and I'd be going to a solicitor.

what a cow! agree with everyone else, solicitor defo, try not to let it stress you however hard....

do you have support from your parents/family/friends? get them to write counter-letters to your gp since they seem to take letters so seriously!