Getting nervous about early retirement - anyone else recognise this anxiety?

[PrimRoseLaffington]

Me and DH planning to retire early in a couple of years.

We've been planning it for years and have modelled various scenarios. It'll be OK. We have enough money, and we'll have enough income.
We're not extravagant people - we actually don't need much money at all to live very happily.

But I can't help feeling like I've missed something or that there'll be a massive black hole that'll only become apparent once its too late.

It feels like stepping into the unknown.

Sorry, I'm not sure why I'm posting this.
DH can't understand my anxiety so I guess I'm looking for outside perspectives.

Did anyone else feel this way when heading into early retirement? How did you solve it?

My husband just died. I'm 60 this month. Probably not planning enough. Not even had funeral yet. Off work rest of the month but planning early retirement as life too short. 2 children - 6th form and university. My salary low. However, sadly, money going to be unlocked due to death of dh. I'm going to risk it. Have sort of job where likely to get job again if need it. Going to resign in a few days.

I'm so, so sorry for your loss.

I agree - life is very short and you never know what's around the corner.
My dad died just shy of his 50th birthday when I was a teenager and its definitely shaped my approach to life and work.
I'm not wasting more of my precious life than absolutely necessary on working.

I wish you and your children all the very best x

For my wife's 60th birthday we went to Thailand. There we had a motorcycle accident and according to the police lucky to be alive. Wife spent her 60th in hospital! As soon as we got back I was going to hand in my notice and retire but luckily redundancies came and I took it. Life is too short!

We’re both retired and will be on a slightly reduced income until DH receives his State pension in 4 years. I do 2 things - keep a track of all our spending each month on a spreadsheet, and have a fairly detailed spending plan. The aim is to keep my spending as close to our income as possible with the knowledge that we may need to dip into our savings occasionally.
After years of shunning a shopping list before stepping into a supermarket, now we meal plan weekly, draw up a shopping list and stick to it.

I'm pleased you're both OK. What a terrifying experience. I'm glad it prompted you to take the plunge and leave work!

Edited because I used "I'm pleased" twice which made me sound like an AI bot.

I have just sent in resignation. About to turn 60 and resignation date after 60th Birthday. After husbands funeral want to spend more time with older family, support my children and simply be....

Also, have volunteer role I can do more in if want to.

Thank you 🙏

Not ‘pottering’ ugh!!!

I have a spread sheet with incoming and then a spread sheet for bills

then give myself an allowed and put savings away

the savings are for things like, Xmas, birthdays, everyday holidays and days out

other holidays come from dipping into savings pot already funded

i stopped working 5 years ago

my savings have increased - mainly as I’ve not touched interest on some savings

have about 6/7 weeks away each year and a week or two special holiday. Aim for one special day out a month , a meal out once a month and a couple of weekends away

day to day my spending is on food, drink and fuel

i Got the first 4 years I didn’t take my pension, but do now as otherwise I need to live until I’m 86 to break even - I’d rather the money now and it will increase yearly how much I receive

Someone else might have mentioned this but I heard on the radio the other day a pensions advisor talking about retirement planning in three phases

1. Your Go Go years when you are fit and healthy enough to have some adventures
2. Your Slow Go years when you might not travel so much and need a bit less income
3. Your No Go years when you might not be able to do much at all but have higher costs in the way of support.

He also said a third of people live into their 90s so this is also what we need to plan for.

I think rather than knowing what other people have, it’s better to know what your disposable income %after bills

I’d be looking for 65% + to be comfortable

I'm 63 and DH died four weeks ago. I had been his carer for some years. I get some of his military pension but nothing on my account till 67. But we stashed away as much as we could, mostly in ISAs, so when our current account gets a bit impoverished I can drip in something from savings. I've only got to survive three and a half years and there's plenty for that. Feeling a tad nervous but exhilarated too.

Nails it. Retirement brings its own anxieties. And, from experience, they get more acute as time goes on and it’s less a question of “how do I have an enjoyable retirement?” and more “how do I hedge against increasing frailty?”

This is a great model to use to think through the (hopefully) long years of retirement. Thank you.

Not sure this is helpful or not but I read that many pensions take a hit in the first few years after a person retires. Purely because pensioners spend a lot more time monitoring their pensions and making adjustments when they should just leave well alone. Just a cautionary tale if you’re worried and monitoring your finances more don’t be tempted to tinker with them I guess.

secondary, dementia has been linked to loss of worth so do make sure you have a firm plan in place for keeping busy more than pottering and visiting friends -who it sounds like will be mostly working anyway.

Why don’t you try living on what you expect you’ll have for pension income now. Put the rest into ISA or pension pots. It will give you a decent stint of knowing how the finances work.

You can always adjust for eg commuting costs that won’t happen in retirement etc - though likely to be offset with other costs given you’ll have more time for things

I can highly recommend rebel finance school.
It is a free course aimed to help people understand their personal finance position and shows how you can retire early. Full of info including retirement calculators budgets etc.
The couple who created it have been awarded the British empire medal for services in financial education.
It has changed my life and my outlook.
So worth looking into and it will cost you nothing.
They are not there to make a profit, just to educate.

I signed up to RFS a few years back but I didn't really follow the course. I probably should re-engage.

That's a really good idea. Crunching the numbers every which way says our income will be more than we expect to spend. But actually role playing it for a year will be a good test!

I would pay for some financial advice

Sometimes you have to leap into the unknown...This is how I have been feeling lately. I think we sometimes forget that we only have one life and don't get to have another go at it if we feel we could have got our early. I am a finance manager and have modelled on Excel and tried so much stress testing and using AI that I can almost feel AI rolling it's virtual eyes at me for being like a dog with a bone.

I have worked hard in a very stressful sector for 40 years and am so burnt out I cannot face another day. Handing notice in soon and its the most excited I have felt for 3 years.

So glad I found this thread and I’m in a slightly different and very fortunate position so frankly feel like an idiot being so stressed about the decision.

transitioned into tech sales admit ten years ago and was very fortunate that’s to already have paid off our mortgage, so the income has been more than we needed, meaning accidently tbh we’ve in a position that at 50c we have enough across different levers (savings, investment, pension etc) that our financial advisor has said we are good to draw 60k a year no issues. It’s like the veil has been lifted because I’ve been grinding away at a very stressful, highly target driven job in the corporate world for the last few years when my heart left the building ages ago! I want to write, be more creative and see where it takes me and am incredibly lucky that’s I could do it.

so why I am so bloody terrified! I’ve been the main bread winner for all of our lives (my dh has a health condition meaning he takes on jobs occasionally but it’s top up money) so I’m stuck in this guilt spiral of torching a well paid career others would be so grateful to have (I see so many people my age made redundant and can’t get back into work, with AI just accelerating that). And worried that if something I’ve not accounted for happens and I can’t get back into work that I’ve frankly messed it all up! My DD is 19 and doing an apprenticeship in a sector that doesn’t pay well but has purpose (which I love!) and I also want to help her with a house deposit which I’ve modelled and we can do that fine.

I just wish I could accept that it’s OK to not want this anymore and trust that it’s OK to start drawing down on what we’ve managed to build. I also think it’s a fear of the unknown, because I don’t know what life will feel like on the other side

I really sympathise with the fear of taking that decision in to an unknown world. DH and I ran our own business, and when we hit 60, frequently asked ourselves when we would have enough.

Covid knocked the head on our business, so we were sort of forced into a decision - and you know what, it's working well. We keep ourselves busy, have done lots of travelling, and we are in a better position financially than our spreadsheets suggest we should be.

A brush with breast cancer for me and a nasty few months for DH who is the fittest person in the world, have made us realise that there are more important things in life - and we plan to enjoy them.

Good luck @Midlifechampion in making your decision!