Found out I’m not on a house deeds..

[KindOpalBear]

When we bought the house, our twins were just 4 weeks old and I wasn’t well enough to look into paperwork. I’ve put in £70k my life savings, my partner same £70k and his mother helped us and borrowed us £500k (she basically remortgaged her house to help us). We are paying her loan and our mortgage every month and have been for the last 5 years we’ve been here. Today during an argument my husband shouted that I’m not on the deeds of the house. That shocked me. I’ve paid for title registry on gov.uk and it says the registered owner is him alone, no mention of me. He says that I’m definitely on the deeds but he would need to ask the lawyer to send him documents proving that which will cost £200. Am I being fooled? My heart sunk and I’m just In shock. I feel like him and his mum did this together. Is anyone here who knows legal stuff and can confirm it title registry shows just one person that means I’m not on the deeds?

Correct

Sorry, I misread your first post and thought it was your mum that lent the money.

His mum did loan him money!

Wow. This is shocking. It doesn’t matter that legally you’re entitled to half because you’re married. He has deceived you deliberately. This would be unforgivable to me.

I’d lay money on his mum signing to pretend she was you

So on top of 140k between you and 500k from his mother, you have a mortgage? That sounds like a very big house! Are u sure he put his 70k in?

I’m not on the deeds to mine and my husband’s house either as it was his house which I then moved in to about a year after we started dating.

I just assumed that as we were married now it wasn’t a problem.

This thread has made me feel anxious.

I have just looked at the HR1 form and it may as well be written in a foreign language for all the sense it makes to me ☹️

I’m going to have another look at it in the morning with fresh eyes and hoping that when I’m not so tired it won’t look quite so daunting.

This is an aside, but demonstrates how marriage can protect you, either in divorce or death of your spouse - If, in giving the house to your DC when you die, your DH will have less left from the total of your joint estates than he'd have got in a divorce (and letting him live there is not the same as giving him the asset), he should be able to successfully contest the will. If he has his own assets that are equivalent to the house then it balances out, but you can't leave a spouse penniless, or in a worse state than they'd be if you'd divorced instead.

My husband played that same trick … we moved when we had 3 small daughters, and he registered the house in his name only. I discovered his trickery when we separated last year - he thought he’d get the total value of the house, and I’d be penniless. What a knob, eh? Luckily my solicitor discovered this, and had my name added to the deeds. (Horrible husband went into a screaming rage when he discovered this - he just couldn’t believe i could possibly have an equal share in the marital home…what bastard trickery!) But when we went to court the judge decided instantly that the house belonged to us both equally. So get legal advice…asap

Please tell me you work @KindOpalBear ? Do you have access to a joint account ? Have you seen any financial paperwork re annual mortgage statements ? I suppose it’s a lesson to other women not to be so trusting and naive when it comes to financial matters in marriage .

I agree with this. Marrying him was the get thing that you could have done legally. He doesn't have a leg to stand on.

I was in this position - as if we put me down as co -owner despite putting up the deposit from saving pre kids as I was SAHM at time it brought down what they would lend. It was very odd and I was unhappy but as I was married knew I had some protections as it was it would be seen as a martial asset bought several years after we'd been married.

Next house he put me on straight away - didn't even have to ask.

My worry would be his lying about it and you having to find out.

People do get soem very odd ideas about how things work when they actually haven't done any research - so woudl worry lying about it mena he thinks he can walk off with entire house if marraige fails.

He has shown you his true colours. What a selfish, devious basturd he is!

OP what was your argument about that he threw you not being on the deeds at you?

I can see how not being on the deeds could happen if the two of you have agreed on the house, were presumably fairly desperate to get your new family in there asap, then you end up having a difficult birth and being unwell, so he doesn't want to bother you, just wants tog et everything sorted as easily and quickly as possible with the least stress for you. Maybe he asked the solicitor if it made any real difference and the solicitor said something along the lines of - not really, you're married, been together a long time, she's paying for it too etc. She will be considered to have an interest regardless of the paperwork, and you can always add her later (maybe that's where the £200 comes into it - solicitor says we can add her on when she's feeling better for about £200). Then after all the paperwork is done, the deeds don't really come up again. You are busy with twins and he forgets about it.

So I can see that happening and it not really meaning anything nefarious on his part. Just the craziness of twins and it being a hidden admin thing so slipped his mind to fix it or ask if you wanted to sort it. And similarly I can see why not being asked to sign in the middle of all that wasn't something that made you concerned - you were ill and a new mum to twins, far too much going on, and by the time your head comes up above water again, the house purchase is done and dusted and you don't think about it again.

But for him to have brought up you not being on the deeds in an argument means it hasn't just slipped his mind. He's known about it and hasn't tried to sort it and since he's thrown it at you like that, he clearly sees it as some sort of power thing. So what else has been going on? What were you arguing about? Is this the first thing he's done that's controlling and puts you in a worse position? Is he secretive about money matters in other ways? Do you know about his pension and savings? Did you have to fund your maternity leave yourself?

If you’re legally married you have rights on that basis. Ask a lawyer to put a marital charge on the property to prevent it being sold without your knowledge. That’s VERY important because you are not on the deeds. Then get a lawyer to go through the options in terms of your contribution. Good luck.

I’m going to ask him to put me on as equal owner.

Don't ask him anything without speaking to a solicitor first. You now now he's prone to lying.

I agree, look at what he's done. You were ill & overwhelmed caring for his tiny baby twins & he took the opportunity to screw you over, after you provided him with children.
If his mother is also involved then she is evil & they both see you as a disposable womb.
You cant trust him any further than you can throw him.

Not necessarily and definitely, not automatically. She will need to fight in court for it as married from 2017 may be taken by court as a short marriage. A good barrister on his side can reduce her percentage of equity.

I would put my foot down. Either he puts you in the deeds whatever if costs or you stop contributing to the expenses of the house. Whatever you do, do not ever get to be financially dependant on him. There is no fucking way he didn’t realise your name was not included in the deeds.

This.

he thinks he has been clever, but you’re married and have kids. It means in the event of a divorce it will all be divided 50/50. Doesn’t matter if you’re not on the deeds - it’s the matrimonial home.

either way, I’d be looking into a divorce. He has tried to steal 70k from you. Thank god he has been too thick to understand the implications of marriage

Rubbish.

And after giving birth to his children. Jesus fucking Christ.

He's been planning for this moment from the very beginning OP. He is not on your side, and for me this would be a divorce material.

But there are kids involved. That changes everything. Particularly if they are young. The court says housing should be split equally, so even if he owned ( genuinely) 100% of the home, it would still go into matrimonial pot.

Also - OP should have evidence of the 70k andren fact she has paid half the mortgage

You can ask for bank records up to 6 years so you should be able to prove you put in £70k. Get on to your bank/building society straight away and ask for bank records from time you put money across. Then tell your h to add you immediately even if it means remortgaging your home. I'd be telling him it's that immediately or you get a divorce. How dare he try to cheat you out of your life savings. You need your name on deeds to protect you and your twins. It just shows why it is hard to trust people.

It’s not rubbish.

5 years is seen as a short marriage. OP could get a reduced rate unless she can prove she put £70k in. I'd be going non co tact with the evil MiL too.