£1000 to spend

[Userjal]

Hi, I know this probably has been asked 1000 times before but I’m struggling with money and I need a bit of a reality check if I’m honest. So we currently work on whatever is left after bills food and fuel is disposable money. Which is £1000 roughly. Now this £1000 is always gone by then end of the month with very little to show for it. I need help budgeting and I just need to understand how other people are doing this. So your ‘disposable income’ is this what’s left after you’ve saved for Christmas, birthdays, kids clothes, holidays etc.or do all of these
things come from your disposal income, I need a reality check but I don’t know if I’m living beyond my means or if £1000 to clothes kids, days out, nights out meals out adhoc stuff isn’t enough. For reference we are a family of 4. Thanks

I do zero-based budgeting too, so everything is covered by monthly allocations of funds. I have about 40 categories but that includes literally everything: birthdays, Christmas, new clothes for kids, haircuts, dental, boiler device, car repairs, home and garden maintenance, replacing technology, holidays, etc. So I don’t really have ‘disposable’ income, I have money in categories for different things. There are categories that are more flexible than others: the family entertainment budget can be reduced when needed, groceries can be cut back if needed.

The problem with your £1000 is what happens when there’s a month you have an unexpected car repair bill and also a school trip to pay for. Or your passports need to be renewed but your laptop dies. If you just live month to month relying on spare money to cover what happens that month, it leaves you vulnerable when life happens.

Whereas if my car broke down and the dog got ill, I am covered for both things without stressing because money has been building in those categories for several years now. I could pay it and it would make no difference to anything else.

And also hypothetical bills are rarely ever hypothetical. We know that at some point our car will need new tyres and repairs, the boiler will break, we will need to replace tablets or laptops, birthdays happen every year, kids need new clothes. These are not unexpected expenses so their occurring shouldn’t be unexpected either. That money all has to come from somewhere.

I've reached a stage in life where I've done my saving, and following bereavement have been throwing caution to the wind re my spending, doing a lot of travelling etc.

I'd still find £1000pm after bills and food quite a lot.

When I was budgeting for more seriously, I found writing it all down helped. You realise how much youre spending on coffee or restaurants just becuase you didn't want to cook. How much kids clothes they don't really need are costing you etc.

Another thing that I found helped when I was beginning to budget was to use cash wherever possible. So I'd work out how much money I planned to spend on a night out, for example, and take it in cash. Then once it was gone it was gone. There's something much more realistic about handing over a note and seeing it disappear. Waving a phone/card is so easy. Even now when I want to make a conscious effort to have a no spend/ low spend week I stick to cash. It's a real eye opener!

What I've found is you getting same buzz from putting money in your pots and watching it grow and a real feeling of security once your savings build up.

I find it easier to say to myself , nope, no budget for that random spend because Im bored than that wierd restless feeling of wandering round the shops

I took up running, collated some good shows on Netfix, joined a library ( you can read most magazines for free !)Downloaded free podcasts, sorted out my house and garden with a huge declutter and feel much more in control than 5 years ago!

Good luck @Userjal

I think this pp has hit the nail on the head. I think a lot of spending issues are about mindset… it is so easy to slip into habits, and not see them as a massive problem, but they all add up. You need to prioritise savings and emergency pot - and then budget your fun carefully! And find cheaper things to do with friends :)

You can have a ‘miscellaneous one offs’ pot for things like this. If you don’t find you need it you’ll have some savings. But I bet you’ll dip into it more than you think.

My pots (in Monzo) are:
christmas, birthdays, car (to use for insurance and road tax as well as servicing, tyres etc), house fund (repairs, decorating etc), household electrical a (eg for when we need a new washing machine if it breaks), miscellaneous one offs, gadgets (buy phones etc outright so save for when one breaks), holidays, house insurance, haircuts, clothes for me, clothes for kids, hobby (race entries and kit), dental, pets (vet bills, immunisations etc), tv license.

I allow myself to move stuff between pots but not to spend money I don’t have - so eg if I wanted to not cut my hair for a few months and buy more clothes that is fine, but I can’t take a load of clothing spending out of the Christmas pot in July as then there wouldn’t be enough in it by Christmas.

£100 is a massive amount to spend on a night out. I would assume that this was a rare special occasion. In your situation, I would budget say, £50 per week for going out, so if you spend £100, you stay in the following weekend.

We'd manage very easily on that amount. It's worth looking how much you're spending on the things you do or buy, ie can you buy cheaper clothes, can you do things that are cheaper with the children, ie walk/play area and take sandwiches, can you spend less each time you go out - ie if I got out with friends I'll spend £22-30 at the most, which would get me three nights out against your one night at £100. Could the odd meal out be turned into a bring and share at yours occasionally?

I think you are in the habit of spending too much but you don’t actually appreciate it now - it feels normal / mundane.

I’d try doing a no spend month - I used to be very financially comfortable and was spending similarly to you. When the kids were babies I’d spend £100 in Jo Jo maman Bebe without even thinking about it. No savings really. Then I got a divorce and had no money - it was insanely stressful to be honest but actually it was quite interesting to see what I missed and what I didn’t.
i spend very differently now even though I’ve got back into a comfortable position and prioritise savings and security. I still don’t feel like I know what I’m doing but feel I’m learning and on the right track.

I have three kids - just want to put some of your money choices in context. We have a lovely life but there is zero chance of spending £100 on a night out! Over Christmas we went to the panto £66 and bought drinks while there £15 and we also went ice skating £56. That’s it. My work Christmas night out cost probably £50-£60 including a taxi home. On a usual month at the weekend we bake, watch movies, walk the dog, play board games. Sometimes we go to a cafe for breakfast or have family over for lunch. It’s not often at all that we do paid for activities outside of hobbies. But the kids do a hobby each at the weekend. If I see friends we usually go for a walk or coffee so probably £5 cost max? Sometimes we go to each other’s houses and have lunch. Occasionally a drink.. if a meal then it would be for someone’s birthday.

I used to be prone to buying stuff too but it’s possible to train yourself out of it - I think it’s just a habit. add it to your basket and then leave it..
Id save half of the £1000 each month at the start of the month and then challenge yourself to spend literally nothing outside of food / petrol and see how it goes 🙂

When I started reading your thread, I was like, wow-Imagine having a grand fun money every month!

But as I read on, you're not covering all your bills exactly, nor have any savings. So, if was me, I couldn't see it as fun money. Well, maybe e200 or so of it.

Personally, I couldn't live like this.

I have sinking funds, which means, it's money put away into different pots for bills/when something goes wrong.

• Sinking fund for house/appliances. About e100 every month. Recently something with a part plus labour was e350 and it didn't bother me because I had it.

• Sinking funds for car, tyres/service. e100.

• Sinking funds for Glasses and teeth. Yea, I've a Perscription where thinning costs a fortune, so I put away few quid a month. If I need anything for a my teeth, it's there also.

They are just examples. I could not just fly by the seat of my pants. I also know where my money is going.

At the same time, I bought a bag for e180 at Christmas because I worked hard to make all these savings. And so a pat on the back for me. A good quality leather bag. But I don't go around buying stuff every week.

Just an example/different perspective.

Thank you everyone who’s commented all of the advice has been great, and everyone’s been very kind. I’ve made a list of what money can go where and will try my best to stick to it, we have a birthday this month which will come out of this months spends in full so will be able to start properly next month. I think I also have to realise that me working part time is a luxury, so when I am going out with friends, not often but stilll, they work full time so they maybe can afford to drop £100 on a night out, where it has become clear i probably can’t, so I need to realise my priority needs to be different so if they want me to go, they’ll have to rein it in