I’m in so much debt.. anyone been here before?

[countrybumpkinlumpkin]

I moved out when I was 20 & had nothing. I’ve always had a good work ethic & I’ve had a part time job from when I was 12 up until I started full time at 18. I’m now 34. Broken home life, no pocket money, nothing ever given to me, fine, appreciate I’m not the only one. Anyway I always paid everything myself. Own bill, car, rent. Just trying to live I got myself in to debt. I also made a few stupid decisions along the way for dopamine hits essentially. I tallied up my debts & I owe nearly 40 grand.. on what? Fuck all that’s what. Now I’m paying it back, with a loan on a good low interest rate & 2 0% credit cards. But I just feel so shit about myself. I earn £1500 a month but the repayments are around £600 all in, plus rent & other bills, I’m not left with much. It’s all my fault, I can’t blame anyone else, I’m just looking for anyone that may have been through it to hopefully say there’s light at the end of the debt ridden tunnel?!

There is light at the end of the tunnel. I can promise you that much.

Have you had proper impartial debt advice from either Stepchange or CAP ( Christians Against Poverty )?

Do you work full time, that doesn’t sound like much income if you do?

@MiddleAgedDreadNo, part time. DH full time, 2 kids.

@PeeledOrangesThank you. No I’ve never really felt the need for advice, I’ve got everything on a good rate, I’m just so cross at myself & want to get out of it.

I think you have to start by working out exactly what it's gone on otherwise you'll just end up in the same predicament again surely. If you can't afford to live on what you earn have you checked whether you might be eligible for a bit of UC top up/ help with rent? Perhaps use an online benefit calculator.

Have you pooled finances with your DH?

I highly recommend a chat with an advisor at Stepchange; they have all kinds of great information at their finger tips and may have some helpful advice to to reduce the debt further.
Good luck, you can get this done!

Have a look at Financielle they have an app and a podcast. You can do it.
Vinted, could you do another couple of work shifts or a second job?

Get in touch with a debt advisor- I second CAP or Stepchange. Things will get better the moment you take the first step

Can you go full time? It would seem the most obvious answer to earn more to chuck more at the debt.

My other half has been in debt since he was 18. When he was 35 (six years ago) he made the decision to a) never borrow money again and b) pay it all off. It’s been a lean few years (his repayments were around £700 a month) but he’s done it – he will be debt-free in March. You can do it, OP. It is so worth it.

I’d really recommend professional advice. Stepchange are generally very good.

Even if it’s just a once over to check that not missing any opportunities to improve payback period, and that your budget going forward is sustainable.

It’s a government funded service, you pay for it through your tax, you might as well get some use from it.

And I mean this kindly, if you’ve got into that amount of debt then budget and finance management probably isn’t your strength in life - a bit of expert coaching wouldnt be a bad idea.

It’ll also give you that confirmation that there is hope and light at the end of the tunnel.

Look at the Rebel Finance School on Facebook

I was very nervous about posting this so thank you for all the kind, supportive comments.

I have tried to go full time at work but there’s currently no hours for me, hopefully that will change. I am the Vinted Queen, I put everything on there, as for a second job due to DP’s working hours it wouldn’t work as he is working most evenings, some weekends. It’s debt that has started up 15 years ago & some of it was a must have, i.e I live rurally, I needed a car when I started my full time job, so I had to get a loan to get one. I lived alone for some time but needed to pay rent & bills so any other expenses went on a credit card. I think it spiralled from there really. Just had a really stupid attitude of ‘stick it on a credit card’ for things I didn’t actually need. Made some such stupid decisions. But hopefully I can keep making a real dent in the big mess I’ve created myself.

@peachgreenThats amazing!!

Stepchange are lovely. Not judgemental at all. It’s a big step just to total it all up, so well done

Get yourself on the Debt Free Wannabe boards on Money Saving Expert. You'll get more specialist advice there.

How much does your credit rating matter? Are you due to remortgage soon for example or do you work in finance?

If not a DMP through Step change might be a good option. But if you can cover the repayments and are not being hit with ludicrous interest you may be better managing it yourself, using the snowball method etc.

You've been through a very expensive period of life with young children. Now is the time to get on top of it.

I'm sure you will.

Have your shared this with your DH? I hope you have, as you might be able to make some lifestyle tweaks between the 2 of you to help. I know I would feel worse if I couldn't talk to him about it, even if I knew it was my problem.

You sound pretty on the ball OP. Does your DH know about the debt? If not I think you should tell him and see if you can funnel more of you money into the debt and less into the bills for a bit, especially as you're only working part time and are probably doing most of the childcare.

You're not the only one - this woman had a huge amount of debt and has just cleared the last payment: https://www.instagram.com/that_girl_in_debt/#

Here here @PeeledOranges i was going to suggest CAP : they helped me get out of debt and I have never been in debt since . CAP are a great charity I recommend them too!

Do speak to the debt charities because they may be able to negotiate with lenders on your behalf

OP you will never pay this back on £1500 a month.

Talk to stepchange and they will consolidate it all and you just pay them interest free.

I disagree with most PPs about getting advice or working more because it sounds like you’re on top of this, the payments are manageable and not costing you too much.

If you go down the debt management route, you'll mess up your credit history for years, whereas currently you 'just' have to wait it out until you're out of debt.

How long will that be now? Just keep plugging away and look forward to your debt free date after which you'll be able to put all you've learned about sticking to a budget into practice and save for things like new cars, also annual and irregular costs and maybe even buying a home.

Make sure you take some of the Vinted money to buy your own treats and that you have sufficient clothes and shoes etc.

But when you're out of debt you'll see a £600 pm boost to your household income, also when your DC are older you'll be able to work more so both of which will improve your household income substantially.

If you're the Vinted Queen, why dont you advertise on your local FB groups and sell other people's stuff on Vinted and take 50% of the profit?