What % of income is reasonable to borrow?

[MyDogHumpsThings]

I’m looking to move house. My husband and I have stable jobs with no immediate concerns, but I still worry about the future, given the financial climate and the susceptibility of both our jobs to being replaced by AI at some point. For reference, I’m in my early 40s and he’s mid-50s, so we both have a significant period of work ahead of us.

We currently pay 17% of our combined net income on our mortgage and have 11 years left. We’re not mumsnet rich by any means, but our current low mortgage means we do have some money to save and play with.

Anyway, long story short: I’m being seduced by beautiful houses that the mortgage calculators tell me we can afford, but I’m uncomfortable having basic expenses that couldn’t be covered by one of our wages in the event that one of us loses our job.

I realise many families require two wages to pay their expenses and that this isn’t a choice many people get to make. If they have to do it, why should I be so precious about not exceeding one of our incomes on basic expenses? Is it greedy? Or should I not tempt fate by being greedy for a nicer house? My current house is lovely, I just want to move further away from other humans!

How much of your income would you be comfortable spending on mortgage or rent?

(By basic expenses, I mean mortgage, council tax, running costs for one car, one mobile phone, food and utilities). I have an adult child, so no child-related expenses.

Think ahead 20 years when one/both of you are unable to drive. Will you be living somewhere with easy access to services - food shop, Dr, Hospital, train station.

Would you end up having to move again?

I wouldn't go above 30% of income towards housing. I prefer to keep it to 25% but that's becoming very hard to maintain these days.

I know what you mean. Also not rich, bit same set up that salary coveres all basics and more in casw of job loss. We would just have to REALLY watch spend on food. If we would absolutely need, 1 nmw ft job could cover all bills and toast.

I would resist the seduction tbh. Sorry just realised you said moving away from humans. I get that🙈 But still I would most likely stick it out unless it's really too much

It’s a good point! I imagine, given the disparity in our ages, it’ll probably affect me the most since I’ll be able to drive him around for a longer portion of his life. I think there are reasonable bus routes near the houses I’m considering.

Is that 30% of one income or both incomes? Our 17% is as a percentage of both, so around 30ish% of one income. I do appreciate the flexibility in my finances! I grew up with very little, which probably influences my level of concern!

Very sensible! I’m being a massive snowflake about where I live. It’s a quiet estate, but someone has started parking on the road instead of their empty driveway (I know what I sound like! 🙈) and it just triggers my lack of tolerance for other people!

I think it depends what your total income actually is. There's a difference between 20% of £40k and 20% of £200k, you'll have far more disposable income after bills with the latter.

Personally, our combined income is around £120k (before tax) and our mortgage is 20% of our take home pay. I wouldn't want to go higher than 20% of take home on our income, and we're working on paying it off as quickly as we can to reduce this so overpay.

We’re on about 90k before tax. I’ve worked out that increasing the % to up to approx 25-30% of our current combined income would allow us to live (if massively scrimping!) if the higher earner lost their job.

How did you arrive at the 20% figure, if you don’t mind me asking?

% means nothing. All that matters is that you have enough actual ££ to pay your outgoings.

Agree with this. 25% is the highest I've gone and (I had a small child and childcare at the time) it was enough to curtail our weekends and reduce our 'fun money'.

I know people spend more, and I know I'm lucky, but as a single mum and sole income, I preferred always to have an emergency fund.

Are your earnings likely to increase, OP? Have you given any thought to future care needs?

You are assuming you will be able to carry on driving. Start by assuming would we be the reality of neither of us could drive for at least 6 weeks.

Moving is incredibly expensive and stressful.

Park outside your own house instead 😂

Being able to pay essentials on one salary is a gold standard for me - because that’s one less worry of something goes badly wrong - job loss, illness

you are right to be grateful to be in this position - o would not recommend being seduced by the promise of ever more

edit to say I don’t think o should spend x% on anything - that encourages you to always uplift . Mugs game . Trapped in the consumer cycle. I try instead to think of my overall happiness.

So you're moving because you don't like someone parking on the road? You know that could happen anywhere? It can be even worse in a rural area plus you're so car dependent. At your age and with no dependents I'd only be moving to reduce outgoings so you could look to reduce or stop working sooner and enjoy the rest of your life.

There is a bus route, so it wouldn’t be too bad - plus I’m only 40 - I can’t possibly think about care needs or being unable to drive!

The expense is a huge consideration; I’ve bought and sold four houses in the last ten years and it gets more expensive every time. I was hoping this would be the last one! But experience has shown that I get itchy feet very quickly.

I park on my driveway - it’s the right thing to do! I’m almost tempted to do a diagram because the other driver is just a feckless, lazy sod!

They will increase. I’ve had a squiggly career, but I’m hoping it’ll be a straighter line from now on. No, I haven’t thought about care needs and I don’t want to! 🥲 Are we really thinking about future care in our early 40s? I don’t mean to be dismissive, but do people really consider it at such a young age?

Missed your age, saw reference to stopping driving in 20 years time and adult child so thought might be a bit older. Most 80+ people I know drive, but it is largely rural Ireland so there isn't much choice!

Pretty much! I know I’m a snowflake. I just want to live my semi-rural dream down my own private, long driveway that no-one else is allowed to enter. I know I’m unreasonable and petty! I just can’t abide having people in my personal space / line of sight / earshot / downwind. I’m just wondering how much I’m prepared to pay to get it.

This has been helpful, thanks everyone! I will continue to explore houses that would increase my current mortgage, but will limit it to an amount that would allow us to cover all basic expenses on the lower earner’s income. And I won’t rush to buy anything unless I really feel I could live there forever (ish).

AND I’ll try not to let my petty rage consume me in the meantime.

Because that’s roughly what we pay now and we have a decent lifestyle but with childcare costs don’t save or have as much for holidays/extras as we would like. Once we get rid of childcare costs then we will, but that will also rely on not raising our mortgage payments further. 20% without childcare costs on our salary is comfortable for us.

If you hate where you live then move but do you really need to increase your borrowing?
I hate to say it but as someone more your dh’s age he is in (and you will soon enter) snipers alley. I have lost track of the number of friends who have stopped working or drastically cut hours due to ill health in their 50s. One friend had breast cancer in her 40s and whilst back at work is very much part time now and is not fully recovered. The fact she is mortgage free is a huge weight off.

I would be staying put if your only reason to move is a slightly troublesome neighbour. One day you might value having neighbours.
And rural bus services are generally getting worse not better

When we were looking to move in 2022 we had a £450-600k budget. We were both in good work positions. We ended up buying a house ~£500k which was more than doable on one wage. £600k would have required a second wage but part time or low pay would have been sufficient so didn't seem daunting at the time.
Fast forward to 2025 and I was made redundant whilst pregnant and am looking at being out of work for 18-24 months, my partners work has announced redundancies and there has been massive drop investment in our industry and the jobs market is looking pretty bleak. We are very glad that we found a house towards the bottom of our budget, it has made a potentially very stressful year more manageable! All of outgoings are covered by my partner's wage and we have enough spare that we don't have to worry about where the money for holidays and Christmas are going to come from.

We got out mortgage from Nationwide because they calculated it differently. The way they did it really made sense.

Work out your actual income per month (annual divided by twelve is best).

Then work out your expenses the same way. Credit card payments aimed at paying balance in full, car loans, travel, insurance for house and car, Council Tax, Utilities, Groceries including Health and Beauty, Clothing/Shoes/Grooming, MOT and Service for car... Also include regular entertainment costs.

Take what you have left and take away £100-200. What you have left is what you can afford for mortgage payments as a maximum. I'm also a believer in 2.5 X joint salary as a rough guide for how much you should borrow but the version we used actually meant we could borrow more as we didn't have car loans or outstanding CC balances.