Advice please 🙏

[Sarahlouisemamofgirls]

So il start by saying I'm worried and feel useless. I'm a mum of 4 daughters and I'm so so scared about Christmas. I do suffer ptsd and anxiety so that doesn't help. This year I fled domestic abuse and unfortunately as of last week lost my job through no fault of my own. Are there any places that help mothers in this situation? I worry that I won't be able to make them smile or get them a gift they'd like. The two little ones still believe in santa and keep talking about all this magic. I won't go into the details as I find it frankly embarrassing that I've even had to ask for some sort of help but this year's been enough already what can I do to make this happen? Obviously im actively and franticly job searching ive never been out of work the whole 18 years since leaving school so this is like a kick in the bollocks so to speak..Thanks

Well Christmas is 3 months away so I wouldn't make that my main concern just yet.

CAB can advise you as to what you are entitled to benefits wise

Do you get support from a women's aid? They sometimes have gifts for children.

Local churches might also help.

Asking on a local FB freebie group if anyone has anything that might do

Massively adjusting expectations also - you can get books from little free libraries or other books exchanges and wrap them up.

Second hand shops sometimes have low cost toys.

Home bargains can have cheap toys and stationery and art kits.

I think the traditions have more of an impact than gifts.
Make paper chains together.
Have a hot chocolate movie night under blankets.
That kind of thing?
They want to spend time with you and feel loved and safe. They don't want you to be stressing. Try and breathe and do things one step at a time. I've been there and I promise you will get through it.

Hello OP,
We're just bobbing on here to say that we're so sorry to hear you're going through this, OP.
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I would google and see if there are local domestic abuse charities or contact womens aid. They will help link you into support you can access - including help wirh xmas pressies. And whilst materially xmas may look different youve given them the present of escaping abuse - thats the most valuable thing x

Would the salvation army be able to help?? Our local foodbank always does a Christmas fair with lots of inexpensive gifts x charity shops will probably have loads of nearly new toys in soon x luck op x

Look out for any charity events close by who can help with gifts and toys. I think the Salvation Army do them and there might be others as well

I’m so sorry to hear this and would say that you have no need to be embarrassed. You’ve been incredibly brave and asking for help isn’t a bad thing.

There may be baby banks who support older children and do collections for Christmas presents. As PP said, the Salvation Army will and sometimes local schools. Also, there may be free items being given away on things like Facebook marketplace.

I know it’s hard to say don’t worry, but try not to.

Do your kids school(s) do a Christmas fair? If so they may have second hand toys and books being sold. In my area there is a Christmas meal and gifts organised for families in need - there may be one in your area. Your local food bank would probably know and your local library might do so. If there is a local Facebook page (or more than one) check it out as there may be people collecting donations/ asking who needs help.

Even if you are not a church goer yourself your nearest church is likely to have people helping with local support, if you find help nowhere else ask there. The Christingle services are popular with kids too.

Some amazing responses thankyou so much for taking your time to reply to me. Il take all this on board. At the moment It's just all coming at once but I'm sure things will look up. Thankyou again 💓