When my ex-husband and I first separated, we had a private agreement for child maintenance. However, he was very inconsistent with payments—sometimes I would go months without receiving anything at all, and when he did pay, it was rarely the full amount we had agreed upon.
Eventually, I decided to apply for child maintenance. This has been the arrangement for several years now, although he’s never been happy about it. He frequently asks me to cancel the CMS arrangement and return to a private agreement, promising that he’ll stick to regular payments. But based on past experiences, I don’t feel comfortable doing this—I’ve been let down too many times and no longer trust that he would follow through.
Over the years, he has repeatedly tried to reduce his CMS payments by providing false or misleading information. For example, he’s claimed that he has our son full-time, even though he only sees him once a fortnight. Fortunately, this was easily disproved.
His most recent complaint was about having to drive to pick up our son for weekend visits—despite the fact that he chose to move over 50 miles away to live with his new partner. In this case, CMS actually sided with him, and as a result I now pay him £730 a year to cover his travel costs.
Today, I received a notification that his income has been reassessed, and my child maintenance will be reduced from £230 to £75 a month. He’s self-employed, and according to the new information he gave CMS, his income has dropped from £600 a week to £200 a week.
What makes this difficult to believe is his current lifestyle: He lives in a large house with his new partner and their three children. His partner works the occasional cleaning shift but not full-time. They don’t pay for childcare, as her parents provide regular help. He drives an expensive car, and based on everything I know, he doesn’t appear to be struggling financially.
What concerns me most is that he works for a company where his dad is the director. I suspect this makes it easier for him to underreport his income or have it structured in a way that reduces his obligations on paper.
I can’t prove any of this—my suspicions are based on his past behaviour and my knowledge of his lifestyle—but my gut instinct is that he’s not being honest about his earnings. And unfortunately, my gut has rarely been wrong when it comes to him.
I’m planning to dispute this review, but I’m unsure how to go about proving income manipulation in a self-employed case— especially when there’s family involvement in the business. Has anyone been through something similar or have advice on how to raise this with CMS effectively?
Any tips or shared experiences would be really appreciated.