What are your money priorities?

[D20]

I’ve been reading a lot of different money saving and investing sources and it struck me how militant/vocal about what some people won’t spend money on or what they refuse to save money on.

I personally wouldn’t spend on cars, hair/nails/eyelash extensions, or overconsumption like lots of jellycat toys, matching fridge storage etc. (although I do watch this content with strange fascination)!

I do spend my money on my home, Netflix, kids education.

So, what are your personal priorities?

Did you find it easy or difficult to decide? I didn’t put down things like smoking/alcohol that I don’t do anyway.

House renovations we are nearing 3 years in and still along way to go, I also love holidays so it's balance hence why the house is taking so long 😂

All of our spare money goes on independent schooling.

My pension

My non priorities are similar to yours OP: car, clothes / nails etc, lots of "stuff".

However I will spend on eating out, holidays, kids activities - so more experiences I guess.

We spend a lot on things like days out, eating out, holidays. Over and above anything else. Both Ds and I are disabled, my disabilities are chronic and degenerative and I want to make sure we do as much fun stuff as we can now. I don’t save anything. Others would find that awful but we just live day to day really. Having said that we don’t have a mortgage (own outright; paid off from the days when I was quite a high earner) and live quite a comfortable life in many ways. We don’t drink, smoke or go out socially. So no spends there.

Prioritise -

Having a nice house near good schools

Savings for the kids and retirement

Eating well at home - we spend a lot on groceries, don't stint ourselves, spending a lot on strawberries right now

Experiences - we do a lot of day trips, spend a lot on things like theatre

Time as a couple - we get regular babysitting which costs a lot

Actually childcare generally - we don't do any WFH with the kids around, they are in wraparound/holiday clubs whenever we are working

Time generally - we don't do DIY or cleaning, we outsource basically everything in that space

Don't prioritise -

Cars - don't own one at all

Pets - ditto

Clothes - most bought secondhand

Eating out/takeaway - would much rather cook something simple at home

Beauty/groomers - can't really understand getting regular manicures say, seems like a huge waste of money

Somewhere in the middle -

Holidays - we go away 2-3 times a year but these aren't usually super flashy trips/posh hotels, more Airbnbs in areas with stuff to do

Priorities:

my cats
musical instruments
travel
my kids

Priorities:
eating out
holidays
pension

My home.
Holidays
Gigs and theatre
Weekends away

Dont spend money on takeaways or the pub.

As a single mum, my priorities are....
My son's school fees (only one year to go 😓).
Paying off the mortgage (2 years to go)
A reliable, well maintained second hand car for which I pay cash..

I don't waste money on anything cheap or disposable. Clothes are expected to last 5 years minimum and preferably 20.

I cook from scratch rather than eat out. I don't buy take-out coffee or lunch, I can make as good or better from home. I socialise with friends, parkrun & cycle rather than gym, don't bother with subscriptions.

We have a warm secure spacious home, with money for (fairly restrained) holidays and any emergency that arises. Few frills but equally few worries..

Priorities are paying the bills and buying decent food. Paying into our pensions/savings was next on the list when we were working.

Everything else is a bonus. We’ve never wasted money on cars, clothes or beauty (though I do get my short hair trimmed every few weeks and dye it myself). We do spend a lot on holidays now (5 or 6 weeks abroad each year plus at least one or two nights away in the UK each month) but we couldn’t afford to do this before we retired. We also go to a lot of gigs and shows. I appreciate that these are luxuries and if we couldn’t afford it then we just wouldn’t do it. I would never get into debt for a holiday, I’d rather do without.

I’d say mainly nail extensions and Jelly Cats.

Like most people, I'm highly irrational about money.

A lot of my behaviour is based on emotional connections to things that were considered "treats" growing up.

Or things I was told we couldn't afford. Which I either still don't buy now (because I'm used to not having it). Or buy too much of (to prove that I can)

For example: I am very inhibited about buying clothes for myself.

But I will splurge on snacks when out or takeaways at home. Even though that sometimes costs more.

I spend quite a lot on holidays but let the house look like a tip.

I will spend too much on streaming subscriptions because a few pounds a month doesn't seem like a lot (even though it adds up)

I will spend any amount on the kids (all the things I never had-and all that).

Priorities -
Structural house stuff - roof, insulation, windows
Reducing monthly outgoings and future proofing- solar panels and battery, buying cheaper car outright, installing a shower that isn't a deathtrap
Health
Supporting British food producers
Suppprting independent book sellers
Hair - I currently spend a lot dyeing my hair to pretend I'm not 56
Theatre, gigs
Holidays

Stuff I don't spend on - not much, but a few things:
Makeup/nails - last bought something 4 years ago which is still going
Meat - dp is pescatarian and I eat what he does
Decorative house stuff, though we have painted a room this year and I did buy 2 cushions in 2024

Two DC at Uni is wiping me out TBH. Single parent household and it is a killer as the Government don't take into account if you have more than one at Uni. I already have a very good pension and am overpaying my mortgage.

Mine is Greegs sausage rolls and Pandora bracelets.

I knew this thread would go the way it has. MN is so predictable.

*Like most people, I'm highly irrational about money.

A lot of my behaviour is based on emotional connections to things that were considered "treats" growing up.*

Yeah absolutely.

Every time I talk to friends about this sort of thing I think (to myself) that I just can't get my head around what they prioritise but I am sure they think the same about me.

I never got any say in food and it makes me want to be different with my kids - if they ask for strawberries, smoked salmon etc, I almost always just buy it for them.

I have one friend who buys a whole new wardrobe every time she goes on a major holiday - I just can't fathom that at all but for her it's just part of the holiday experience

My kids bloody love jellycats to be fair. That’s what they choose to prioritise spending their pocket money on, and who am I to stop them!

My main expense (after bills) are my pets. I don’t have anything obviously expensive like a horse but I have lots of small animals and easily spend a couple of hundred a month giving them the best life possible.

Similarly my daughter, clubs and lessons.

Books for both of us. There’s not accessible library near here so our bookshelves are groaning.

Clothes I wear until they are full of holes. Get my hair cut by a friend once a year or so. Go to a cafe occasionally, no takeaway coffees or the like. Rarely wear makeup and last got my nails done ten years ago.

Priorities:
Home improvements - moved in a year ago and quite a lot to be done
Overpaying mortgage when I can
This year is myself - mentoring, trainings, new matching clothes, some basic facial treatments, gym, hairdresser
Healthy food
Holiday - this is a priority for this year

I wouldn't buy a brand new car. Such a waste of money.
I wouldn't spend on takeaways.
I do my own nails.

Holidays, experiences, pensions

house desperately needs an update but it’s just not a priority and it won’t be with us when we’re gone

Holidays, pension, and any random toys for cats.

i am trying to have a complete reset about spending in that as a child we didn’t have much so as soon as I started earning I bought whatever I wanted . I earnt well in a stressful job and spending on ‘ stuff ‘ was my pay back . Now I have just retired my money has to last . It’s a drawdown account . I won’t compromise on good food , my two small dogs eat quality meat from the butcher , their care is non negotiable although I was shocked to pay £118 yesterday for wormers and flea treatment.
Mortgage paid off and most money that has to be spent goes on maintenance to include land . Replacing old fencing etc .
in terms of personal spending I have everything I need so I’m prioritising experiences, hobbies , travel , huge amount of socialising, art / craft courses .

Flying business class
Annual long haul holiday
Gym membership
Food and supplements
Skincare
Pets
Private medical

I'm retired. No pub, additional holidays, takeaways or regular eating out, nails, botox etc. My car is an ex demo Merc and I plan to keep it for 15 years. I have a spinal problem and osteoarthritis, so gym is essential to maintain strength and flexibility. Some of my clothes are 20+ years old. Repaired roof and put in new bathrooms two years ago but the kitchen is over 20 years old and I have no plans to redo. My house and furnishings will see me out.

eta to list

Pensions (all my earnings), ISA/LISA and investment accounts. School fees, preschool fees, holidays, day trips, extracurriculars, sports, theatre, concerts, attractions, "experiences" (never-ending productions coming out nearby as we're in London), groceries (spend a fair bit more than we need for nice/convenient stuff).

Weaknesses are ebay/Vinted bargains (toys I'd never buy at full price - not Jellycat but often educational/STEM toys), random Aliexpress crap and projects for the home that I never have time to properly use.

I don't spend any money on hairdressers, nail care, beauty treatments, gym membership, cars or motoring, adult nights out, alcohol, pets, smoking, drugs, cycling, taxis, babysitters, staff (cleaner, gardener etc), gifts for anyone outside the family, attending weddings.