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Original poster

Finance help please

19 replies

Chocchips123 · 06/05/2025 15:34

Hello

I need some advice. Husband main earner. Around 2500 a month in wage. We get benefits as the kids are young.

We are in debt, around 20k ,mix of loans and cards. We pay out around 700 just off the wage over 4 loans and that's not included the cards... we have already consolidated some debts that's why another 2 loans were added...

We have no plans for a pension. What should we do? We have cut back all the spending. We have started with 1000 emergency fund and are actively paying off the debt.

I just worry about our old age. We are both in our 40s.

Still owe 79k on house , was a small mortgage for a small house anyway.

Help ?

OP posts:
topcat2014 · 06/05/2025 15:36

Is the mortgage a repayment? That would be the first thing to fix

mildlydispeptic · 06/05/2025 15:40

Good that you’re doing things like consolidating your debt. Step 1 is to try and knock that off, starting with highest interest rate first. It’s the best investment you can make in the current environment.

topcat2014 · 06/05/2025 15:42

Bear in mind that 2 state pensions will add up to £24k (with no tax), and you might not have mortgage to pay.

I know it is fashionable to say "there won't be any state pension", but that is usually just spouted by folk with large private pensions anyway.

There will always be a state pension - even if it does end up means tested for the highest earners.

AmIHumanOrAmIAYeti · 06/05/2025 15:43

A week ago you were planning to separate.

Your husband is the only earner, not the main earner.

What are your plans for earning more (both of you) as time goes on as your situation is clearly unsustainable.

notatinydancer · 06/05/2025 15:49

is there a reason you’re not working?
how old are the kids?

Original poster
Chocchips123 · 06/05/2025 16:32

AmIHumanOrAmIAYeti · 06/05/2025 15:43

A week ago you were planning to separate.

Your husband is the only earner, not the main earner.

What are your plans for earning more (both of you) as time goes on as your situation is clearly unsustainable.

Dragging this up really had nothing to do with this situation does it. We worked through our neglected state of marriage and decided that it's worth saving and have put it behind us.

The finances have always been an issue. A separate one... I care for our 2 home educated ( due to absolute necessity, believe me !) autistic young children , it's more than a full time job. Its also extremely stressful being home like this on my own all day mon to fri, they have totally different profiles. So difficult to juggle. I get benefits for caring for them. It's not a massive income, it is what it is.

I know once they are adults the money will stop for me and they will claim for them. So we need finance advice for our ( dh and I ) old age years.

OP posts:
Original poster
Chocchips123 · 06/05/2025 16:33

notatinydancer · 06/05/2025 15:49

is there a reason you’re not working?
how old are the kids?

Just replied to someone with that answer.

OP posts:
AmIHumanOrAmIAYeti · 06/05/2025 16:39

Chocchips123 · 06/05/2025 16:32

Dragging this up really had nothing to do with this situation does it. We worked through our neglected state of marriage and decided that it's worth saving and have put it behind us.

The finances have always been an issue. A separate one... I care for our 2 home educated ( due to absolute necessity, believe me !) autistic young children , it's more than a full time job. Its also extremely stressful being home like this on my own all day mon to fri, they have totally different profiles. So difficult to juggle. I get benefits for caring for them. It's not a massive income, it is what it is.

I know once they are adults the money will stop for me and they will claim for them. So we need finance advice for our ( dh and I ) old age years.

Show quote history

It’s very relevant because the impact of separation would be considerable.

Your husband’s pay suggests a salary in the region of £35k.

One or two things (at least) needs to happen - he needs a plan to increase his earnings and/or you need a plan for how you can earn when he isn’t working. Weekends would appear to offer some opportunity and there are lots of things you can do from home to earn too.

Have you taken advantage of the married tax code thing?

Given you are only a week on from your decision to separate, it’s worth thinking about what happens in the longer term if you do separate in future.

fruitbrewhaha · 06/05/2025 17:10

You need to find another income stream. It’s obvious that £2500 is not enough to live on, hence the debt. Are you both working?

I’d do anything I could to earn some extra cash.

CalypsoCuthbertson · 06/05/2025 17:11

Have you heard of Dave Ramsey’s baby steps? He has 7 or so really clear instructions for how to get out of debt and build wealth…

  1. save an emergency fund of £1k. Tick that off straight away if you’ve already got some money sitting there.
  2. pay off all debt using the snowball method (smallest first - your two motivations are the satisfaction of paying each one off, and that you’re resting on £1k emergency fund - gives you incentive to stick with it so you’re not in a precarious position for long).
  3. save 6 months emergency savings
  4. pay off the mortgage

You can YouTube the rest!

HumanRightsAreHumanRights · 06/05/2025 17:44

You have to understand WHY you are in debt in the first place before you can try to do anything about it.

Are you overspending and will you cut down on that spending?
Are you just not earning enough so the bare minimum living costs are more than you are bringing in?

One means sorting out and sticking to a budget, one means you need to increase your income.

howshouldibehave · 06/05/2025 17:54

We get benefits as the kids are young.

What benefits do you get just because the kids are young?

Original poster
Chocchips123 · 06/05/2025 18:33

fruitbrewhaha · 06/05/2025 17:10

You need to find another income stream. It’s obvious that £2500 is not enough to live on, hence the debt. Are you both working?

I’d do anything I could to earn some extra cash.

With the benefits its more like 3500 a month. 2 disabled kids. Full time mum carer.

OP posts:
Original poster
Chocchips123 · 06/05/2025 18:34

CalypsoCuthbertson · 06/05/2025 17:11

Have you heard of Dave Ramsey’s baby steps? He has 7 or so really clear instructions for how to get out of debt and build wealth…

  1. save an emergency fund of £1k. Tick that off straight away if you’ve already got some money sitting there.
  2. pay off all debt using the snowball method (smallest first - your two motivations are the satisfaction of paying each one off, and that you’re resting on £1k emergency fund - gives you incentive to stick with it so you’re not in a precarious position for long).
  3. save 6 months emergency savings
  4. pay off the mortgage

You can YouTube the rest!

Thank you this is very helpful.

OP posts:
GOODCAT · 07/05/2025 09:03

With the debt don't pay off the smallest first. Instead pay off the one with the highest interest rate first.

If you possibly can, your husband should still pay into his pension sufficiently that he gets the employer's contributions.

This phase of your life is not forever and when your children are adults you should be able to work and put something into a pension.

Bjorkdidit · 07/05/2025 09:33

Can you afford to operate a sustainable budget, with all essentials covered including annual and essential costs, such as insurance and no further credit as well as paying off your debts at a sensible rate (ie won't take decades because most of the money goes on interest or you're scrimping in other areas to afford the payments?).

If so, you need to keep plugging away, use the time to learn to manage a budget and then concentrate afterwards on putting money into pensions for both of you - even as a non earner, you can put nearly £3k pa into a pension, which attracts tax relief and should grow, so well worth doing if you can afford it.

If you can't afford the debt repayments without scrimping on things like food or falling behind on other bills or most of your payments go on interest, you need advice from a debt charity, after a review of your overall financial picture.

Make Moneysaving Expert your friend and follow the advice given

https://www.moneysavingexpert.com/loans/debt-help-plan/

Bjorkdidit · 07/05/2025 09:35

Definitely do everything you can to minimise the interest you pay on the debt. Transfer everything you can to low interest rate credit cards but then pay the minimum only, and concentrate on the highest interest rate debt to maximise the amount that goes off the debt, not on interest.

Original poster
Chocchips123 · 07/05/2025 17:38

GOODCAT · 07/05/2025 09:03

With the debt don't pay off the smallest first. Instead pay off the one with the highest interest rate first.

If you possibly can, your husband should still pay into his pension sufficiently that he gets the employer's contributions.

This phase of your life is not forever and when your children are adults you should be able to work and put something into a pension.

Thank you that's a good idea. I can maybe get a job later on down the road, working round their needs. If there are still any in the future.

OP posts:
Original poster
Chocchips123 · 07/05/2025 17:41

Bjorkdidit · 07/05/2025 09:33

Can you afford to operate a sustainable budget, with all essentials covered including annual and essential costs, such as insurance and no further credit as well as paying off your debts at a sensible rate (ie won't take decades because most of the money goes on interest or you're scrimping in other areas to afford the payments?).

If so, you need to keep plugging away, use the time to learn to manage a budget and then concentrate afterwards on putting money into pensions for both of you - even as a non earner, you can put nearly £3k pa into a pension, which attracts tax relief and should grow, so well worth doing if you can afford it.

If you can't afford the debt repayments without scrimping on things like food or falling behind on other bills or most of your payments go on interest, you need advice from a debt charity, after a review of your overall financial picture.

Make Moneysaving Expert your friend and follow the advice given

https://www.moneysavingexpert.com/loans/debt-help-plan/

Thanks. Yes I've put us on a budget. I paid one of the small cards off and gave it to my mum while we used to not relying on credit cards for the fun things .... we can manage with a good budget. We have a better mind set now to stick to one.

OP posts:
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