Stressing about no pension!!

[DonutEnvy]

Hi

Before taking a couple of years off (had kids back to back) I was self employed, and stupidly never thought about paying into a pension.

I am now about to turn 29 years old, and I am hoping to go back to work 1 day a week and get 1k a week income.
Affer budgeting, I can put £200/ month into savings (DH can put £600/ month in) and I can put £100/ month into SIPP.
But after speaking to friends and family who all have around £400+ month going into their pensions (including employer contributions) I feel my contribution is far too low.

The only way I can put more in is if I work 2 days a week (my kids are very young so I didn’t want to work more at this stage) and then I will be able to put £350/ month into my pension.
I don’t know if it is worth doing this.

Rule of thumb is to pay in half of your age at the point you start of gross income.

So, say 15%. That’s £150 a month if you’re earning £1k gross. Anything more than that is great, but you will need to build it up in coming years.

I strongly support financial parity and effort in a relationship. However as a married couple it is not always best to split pension contributions equally. If your DH is a higher rate tax payer then in makes more financial sense for him to make more contributions as he will get higher tax relief. As a married couple if you were to split the starting point for a financial settlement would be a 50:50 split of assets and that includes pension assets so you are not at a disadvantage.

I would ask your DH to top up your pension for you, after all if you weren't looking after your joint children you'd be putting more in your pension - its only fair. Don't accept any less than this. And if he resists, remind him you'd get some of his pension if you divorced and yours was a lot smaller due to looking after shared children anyway! (Only semi joking!)

That surely only works if what you are earning is something approximating a reasonable salary, i.e. it was a rule invented when most jobs were full time

I agree. I paid into a private pension for my DH while he was SAHD.
(It was a US Roth IRA so UK tax relief didn’t come into it)

Why? Get a husband who doesn’t treat you like a servant. I don’t do 80% of child related stuff, and I certainly don’t work all waking hours, because my husband isn’t a shit.

I’m same age as you with same income £1.2k weekly self employed (single mum though) I put £500 monthly in after getting a financial advisor.

Exactly! It's mind boggling people would accept that in a relationship.

But the sooner the money goes in, the more chance it has to grow, so it's a good idea to start as early as you can with as much as you can

The OP says they have young children - as long as they are claiming at least the NI credits associated with Child Benefit, even if the partner earns too much to benefit from the money, then they'll get NI credits until the youngest turns 12 without any need to be employed at all.

DH or DP? Do not downsize your career if not married/in a civil partnership. DH needs to be putting money into a pension in your name, or taking part of the hit on his career.

The distinction between being married or not is so important, and seems to be something otherwise well informed people don't consider.

If it is her DH then using his tax allowances and paying more into his pension may be the right move - but that does take some calculation, consideration of future plans and a degree of guesswork about tax allowances and bands as the couple reach retirement.