DM can't remortgage & hasn't sold her house

[Myfamilyareweird]

DM is chaotic with everything including finances, she's 75 and her mortgage runs out July or August 2025.

She hasn't kept the house in good condition and it's needs big items Kitchen, Bathrooms, flooring, heating system and boiler.

She's known this was coming for years but only just started painting the house (internally) and then says she's putting it on the market after Christmas.

Her expectations for what she'll get for the house and the amount she wants to spend on another house are unrealistic. That concerns me as she might not accept a decent offer because she thinks the house is worth more.

Does anyone have experience of this? I'm assuming if she doesn't sell it by July/ August they'll repossess or if it's already on the market will they give her a little more time and add fees on the debt?

She's in the south and good news is the area is very popular a short drive from well known city and lots of professionals live in the surrounding villages. The village has no amenities though and the local area is on moorland so while her house never floods the surrounding roads do.

I may sound a little harsh about DM but the reality is she is chaotic and very financially and emotionally immature.

She has never been able to manage her money and my siblings and I have helped her out to the tens of thousands multiple times over the years, as have her siblings and her parents.

My parents divorced decades ago. She has maintenance payments from my Dad still (which is another worry as neither are getting any younger and she relies on that and had no real pension).

I'm a bit confused.

In saying "her mortgage runs out in Aug 25" - I would hear that as "the final payment is Aug 25 so then the house is hers and she doesn't owe any money to the bank", but you seem to be implying something completely different ?

Can you explain what you mean?

I'm guessing she has an old interest only mortgage. Eek. Was the plan always to sell?

Is she due to remortgage next year or will it be all paid off?

Is it interest only? If she sells will she make much of a profit?

Mortgages are just loans to pay off a house. They have an end date then you need to apply for another one. If you can’t get another one you can’t pay for the house and it’s repossessed.

@ItOnlyTakesTwoMinutes . Well repayment mortgages (which the overwhelming majority of mortgages are) are designed so that the loan is paid off by the final repayment. So if it is due to finish, then there is no debt left.

You need to explain to her what buyers are looking for these days. People will pay for a good house with good kitchen, bathroom etc. Modern, clean, well fitted.

She does not have these things but she has good location/area and possibly garden, X number of bedrooms or whatever. But the cost of re-fitting kitchens, bathrooms etc to a nice standard these days is huge. She needs to take that into account. She’s not going to swallow the cost of doing that so the buyer will have to. A coat of paint doesn’t mean anything.

Just be upfront with her from the beginning. Her priority should be making the sale to avoid repossession/bad debt, not waiting around for the highest bidder that’s never coming.

Sorry should have said yes she had interest free for a while although she now on a repayment.

She's got a big chunk left to pay I think £125-50k and no easy to repay it other than selling.

OP clearly states she worries the house will be repossessed.

How much do you think she will really get for it?
How much does she think she'll get for it?
How much is the debt?
What's the difference and is it enough to buy or rent somewhere else to live?

It might be worth ringing her mortage provider and saying, while you’re aware they cannot discuss any details of her account with you, you need to let them know that your mother is vulnerable customer and you need a roadmap as to what may happen in order to give her good guidance.

Do you have PoA - sounds like you need it asap. Although even if you apply now it will take some months to come through.

If the worst comes to the worst you can sell it auction.

If possible I would start on getting her house contents sorted through and packed up, as that’s something elderly people struggle with, so that you’re ready for a quick exit if necessary.

Can you get it valued now? She really needs to see what it is worth and her options, as the longer you leave it, the fewer options she has. This might help to start the conversation and it probably needs to be discussed sooner rather than later. From what you said it is a renovation project for someone, so it is about the value now. https://www.fca.org.uk/news/news-stories/borrowers-interest-only-mortgage-should-act-now

Believe me everyone has tried she seems to live in an alternative reality 😔

Good idea thanks.

Could she not get an equity release loan to repay the mortgage?

Can she not stay with her current lender, on a variable rate if what you mean is her fixed rate term is expiring?
What's the approximate value of the house, how much equity does she have?
Can the house go on the market as is? No point throwing more money at it really, sounds like any buyer would be doing a top to bottom refresh anyway.

Once you've established the financial info (good ideas upthread), might be worth looking at over-55 property, often cheaper (but service charges can be hefty).

Thank you @Mirabai I doubt she'd go for me having POA.

She has been packing up one of my siblings had been living there as a stop gap between me John and house so had been helping her.

I know it sounds cruel but both me and a different sibling have stepped away from her a few years ago as it seemed like we were always giving her money ever though we have families of our own to support and sometimes at times we didn't have much money ourselves. She always seems to want/need (I'm not sure which) rescuing and or children needed to be our focus not parenting our adult mother.

I'll have a look at that link @YYURYYUCICYYUR4ME and maybe send to her.

I think the house is worth a good amount @travailtotravel so house near her self for 600k to over a million, i'd guess 600-700k but then that means less people can afford it, she's taking about needing 500 for another house. She wants to be in the country with a big garden, problem is she needs hip and knee replacements plus can't manage her garden which is big now.

But I also think she's got debt we don't know about I know she did a voluntary agreement a while back.

What i'd like is for her to have a nice modern house that's warm and her to have enough cash left over she can enjoy herself, she lives very much hand to mouth at the moment.

No they won't allow her to remortgage in any way as she's over 75.

I've been telling her that for years when they was the stamp duty holiday I tried to persuade her to sell then but she just seems to have a mental block about it all.

@2Pandora I doubt she'd go for it but I'll suggest it.
@NoMoreLifts thank you I know she won't go for that she's always lived in the countryside and can't seem to wrap her head around anything else.

I can understand her wanting to live in the country as that's always what she has known the problem is she needs to be in a village with amenities so she's got them if she needs to stop driving.

Even my eldest has been trying to persuade her to come live in the market town we are in which has some nice leafy green areas but she can't seem to think pragmatically.

In fairness this is no surprise she used to say that interest charges on overdrafts, loans, store cards are wicked (sometimes they probably are) and she couldn't understand why they charged so much. But carried on using them.

I think she's been expecting some miracle she has always said when I make my fortune but hasn't worked since she was about 50 and didn't work before then as she was a housewife which is crazy when I think I'm nearly that age and definitely won't be not working until I'm financially secure.