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Original poster

can i sue?

26 replies

leoleo · 26/04/2008 15:12

My sister purchased a holiday for me and ds. she then fell out with me for a different reason - because i wouldn't allow her to have my ds for a day without me.
She contacted the police and reported me for fraud relating to the holiday and also for stealing money from her. Both alligations are untrue and there is no further action as she cannot validate her story (she is unable to produce bank statements showing the money being withdrawn).
I was arrested and held in custody for 8 hours and my phone has been taken for evidence (to prove that I had authorisation for the holiday to be booked). I have missed the holiday because the police would not allow for the tickets to be released while an investigation was being carried out.My holiday insurance wouldn't cover it so we have completely lost the holiday.
This is a completely malicious complaint.

The police aren't going to take action for wasting police time.

What can I do?

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justaboutwithPMT · 26/04/2008 15:16

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

zippitippitoes · 26/04/2008 15:17

it sounds bizarre

do you have legal on your house insurance they migt be able to help

otherwise i think i would be inclined to try and build bridges for long term if tat was possiblke

smallwhitecat · 26/04/2008 15:17

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LaComtesse · 26/04/2008 15:19

Whose money paid for it? If it was your sister, I don't see how you can sue her for it - what, precisely are you aiming to get? A new holiday, the money back or an apology? If the police aren't going to prosecute her for wasting their time, I can't really see what you'd get from it. Speak to a solicitor if you are unsure.

LIZS · 26/04/2008 15:21

I seem to remember this originally and you could have cancelled at the time of the initial dispute. It wasn't you who paid for the holiday in the first instance, if I recall correctly, so you haven't really suffered an actual "loss" to sue over apart from ill feeling and disappointment. Let it go.

Original poster
leoleo · 26/04/2008 15:21

This is not the first time she has done nasty things and it has to be the last. She was pushing for them to come to my home and arrest me in front of my son.. Why should I let it go.

The travel agent was involved and it is a local agent.

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Original poster
leoleo · 26/04/2008 15:23

Maybe sue is the wrong word. But it was a gift to my son and why should someone be able to do that?
I couldn't cancel the holiday as such as the departure date was to close - it was a birthday gift for my son.

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LaComtesse · 26/04/2008 15:24

The travel agent will know it was untrue then and won't think any the less of it. I can understand that you are angry but really its best to rise above it. Keep your dignity.

Youcannotbeserious · 26/04/2008 15:24

But she paid for the holiday - so I can't see how YOU can recover the cost of that holiday...... Unless you mean to sue her personally, but I really not sure why you would want to drag all that up.

I'd leave it well alone and move on.....

You can make a decision - right here and now - that it's the last time you let her do something like this. Don't let yourself get clsoe to her. Dragging this all up just prolongs it.

LIZS · 26/04/2008 15:24

but surely it is her prerogative to withdraw the promise of a gift, sorry.

Original poster
leoleo · 26/04/2008 15:25

I know but this has been really upsetting. To be locked up all day doesn't sound that bad but it is horrible and they have taken my DNA and finger prints etc which feels like a complete invasion of my privicy.

Does anyone understand what I mean?

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Original poster
leoleo · 26/04/2008 15:27

Ok it is her perogative (SP?) but in such a nasty way when the person she was really angry with at the time was my younger sister whom she couldn't hurt si she has used me to get to her.

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binkleandflip · 26/04/2008 15:29

perhaps you could sue the police for wrongful arrest if you feel it was.

Cant see how you can sue your sister tho

zippitippitoes · 26/04/2008 15:32

i do find it odd from what you say that the police took any kind of action

but the long view for me is what you want to happen

and i think revenge is not the way to go

better to move on and possibly work out how the family is repeatedly making up and breaking up

LIZS · 26/04/2008 15:32

So you 'd claim what exactly and want waht in compensation? It would cost you to atke this anywhere official, a Court may well not think it a valid use of their time to be invovled in a family dispute. I really dontl think, unless you can prove you suffered financial damages such as loss of earnings when arrested that you'd establish grounds worth pursuing. Let alone the longer term effect on your family relationships.

Youcannotbeserious · 26/04/2008 15:34

YOu can't blame the police, really, well, IMHO you can't... It doesn't seem they have acted out of order.......

I can see that you are very angry with your sister, but the anger (and issue) is not over the holiday.

You really need to look at the actual issue - which is defamation of character IMO....

But, there again, I'd say the best thing you can do is ignore your sister all together... If you feel the need to do something publicly, take out a large advert in the paper to inform your community of what she's done and why you will have no contact with her.

smallwhitecat · 26/04/2008 15:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster
leoleo · 26/04/2008 15:39

At first the police said could I come in for a chat and that she had been phoning constantly to have me arrested. She then said she was attacked on her doorstep by two men claim to be acting on my behalf. (Absolutly made up) So i guess the police had been forced into action and the pc dealing with it was a new recruit so i guess she is following everything to book?

I am so upset that this has happened and she has done this to me and there is nothing I can do. Not even to stop her doing something like this again.

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Original poster
leoleo · 26/04/2008 15:42

thank you small white cat. It isn't the holiday. I honestly don't care about that i will take my ds another time but it's the whole issue of her doing this to me. IYKWIM

The police were fine to be honest they have just done their jobs. My only complaint would be the time they have taken to resolve the complaint and not taking action for wasting police time and her have no evidence to support her claims. But i can see that they have a job to do.

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LIZS · 26/04/2008 15:42

This was previous thread, I 'd thought it was further back for some reason. Sorry it led to this angst but really think you could have cancelled there and then , it would have been her financial loss not yours, and your ds is way too young to realise he hasn't had his "present". Did you return the rest or was this the consequence ?

Original poster
leoleo · 26/04/2008 15:47

I can't see what i have done wrong

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Hecate · 26/04/2008 15:48

Go to see a solicitor - they are the best people to give you sound legal advice. Maybe you could get some sort of injunction against her. Maybe a claim for harrassment. Maybe just a solicitor's letter warning her to stop or further action will be taken? Many solicitors give a free initital consultation.

Forget the holiday. She said she was going to pay for one, she changed her mind. Not nice, but not something you can really pursue. Her lying to try to get you arrested is something you can pursue. I fail to see how the fact that, through an accident of birth, she shares genetic material with you, should mean you are supposed to take crap you wouldn't take from someone else, or try to fix the relationship, or be buddies. If someone is a bastard, forget them. Shared genes or not.

Reading between the lines, she seems to have a ...thing ...around your child. (fixation? jealousy?) Falling out with you when you won't 'give' him to her, giving him such lavish gifts with strings attached, wanting him to see you in a bad situation - Is there a reason for that?

Original poster
leoleo · 26/04/2008 15:50

Return the rest what? The money she paid for my treatment? That had already been paid to the hospital and used. This wasn't a consequence she had already made the complaint and was hoping they would arrest me unaware.
She has also reported my younger sister for something else which is being investigated...

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Original poster
leoleo · 26/04/2008 15:52

hecate - no idea..
thank you for your understanding.

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Original poster
leoleo · 26/04/2008 15:52

I think a fixation of the fact that I view myself as a good parent and she can find no reason or person to dispute that fact is a problem as well

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