How to spend it?

[DropOfffArtiste]

If you were in the fortunate position to have mortgage paid off, sufficient retirement pot and DC provided for, what would you spend on to feel more luxurious in everyday life? Not major things like holidays or cars but just to generally "live a bit" and be more high maintenance?

I'm in a nearly similar position (at least, can meet my commitments present and future with enough left over to do what I want).
Things I spend money on to achieve what I consider luxurious or fun (they aren't quite the same):

• Fresh flowers when I want them
• Craft workshops when I want to learn a new skill
• The occasional wellbeing treatment - a massage, spa visit, yoga retreat
• Going to nice restaurants occasionally
• Theatre and live music (this is probably the bulk of my discretionary spending

I try to buy most of my clothes second-hand. That also allows me to have nicer things than I would if I bought them new without any guilt.

Depends on the individual and their likes/dislikes.

I would hire a chef as I hate the daily grind of cooking and shopping - but that may be beyond your budget!

A cleaner and maybe someone who would take on other housekeeping tasks.

I might also increase the number of massages I have as this helps with fibromyalgia.

Assuming the kids are older, it would actually be more holidays but in the form of lots of weekends here and there. Knowing I could jet off to wherever at the drop of a hat...

Otherwise cleaner for sure, some sort of meal service occasionally or a finding a really good restaurant that delivers as a set thing once or twice a week. More bookshelves to fill. The really nice cupboard thing in the charity shop which is 2.5k.

Do you still work? Anyway to upgrade the commute?

Professionally laundered linen and a cleaner. Good quality food from local suppliers.

My big indulgence doesn't sound that big now 😂 but I love beautiful bars of soap (£5-£10 each) for the shower which make me feel really pampered

Thanks, some really nice ideas. I do still work and plan to continue. Only commute a couple of days a week. DC nearly 16 so more freedom to travel soon I guess.

I had some health issues recently so things like yoga and massage are good. I'm thinking maybe of spending a bit more on myself, hair treatments, maybe invisalign or teeth whitening, upgrade my wardrobe when I've lost some weight.

Ooooh what a lovely thread! I am soon to be in the same sort of position (with a mortgage, but no longer squirrelling every penny into a house deposit pot!)

Things I'm looking forward to doing (some are a bit quirky) :

Having a dedicated pantry shelf for fun, unusual soft drinks I find (I don't drink alcohol or coffee, so I feel this is justified 😂) as well as picking up more unique or farm shop-esque finds for general groceries to up our meal standards a bit and give me some dinner inspiration 😂

Being more generous when hosting friends! Filling up a minibar for those who do drink, always having varied snacks and kids drinks about. Investing in a nice BBQ and pizza oven as well and garden furniture. Finding quirky disposable plates/cups for when hosting outside. Filling the guest bedroom/bathroom with lovely furnishings and fancy toiletries.

Regular 'fancy' haircuts and finding a nicer shampoo/conditioner than the discount stuff 😂

Building my jellycat vegetable collection 😏

Upping cleaner hours to include laundry, and maybe a general tidy on Mondays to get over the weekend.

Spending more on clothes/beauty. Might do one of those colour consultations, or at least spend time with a personal shopper somewhere.

Probably not travel more, as we already go away quite a bit, but upgrade the travelling. Nicer hotels, package bookings instead of matching the cheapest flight with cheapest thing on booking.com, might even push the boat out and splurge on premium economy 😂

Get a bit looser with the purse strings on donation requests - from DS school but also with charities. Add trolley items for food banks etc.

Food!!

I'd spank embarrassing amounts on fancy food deliveries and treat top ups. All local wanky artisan style and top quality ingredients

And meals out

Upgrades when travelling! So first class train travel, business class air travel, taxis, porter services! Would love to no longer have to drag all my own luggage around central London/ an airport and to not have to travel at stupid times

Are dc ever provided for in this day and age? I would keep a backup pot for them.

I like museum private tours and taxis instead of public transport.

I am in your position OP. Dh and I splurge on lux holidays, I buy great food and any clothes I like and I give nice gifts, but really
what makes me happy is knowing I have it for when a big expense or emergency comes up. I still look at prices and want value.

Well yes, I suppose DC can always burn through money but uni costs are funded, savings and pensions. I want to spend some on myself, given the future and retirement is never guaranteed. They will have a decent inheritance when it gets to that.

Financial peace of mind is the ultimate luxury I guess.

Regular salon facials and weekly fresh flowers

I think it's whatever you like and the things you mention are a good start because they're obviously the things that are important to you.

You say you'll still work and commute, but if you're getting to a position where you don't need to work (as much) and you value more time, look at reducing the hours you work or possibly changing to a less demanding role. But it depends on what options your workplace, industry and pension offer.

I'm in my early 50s and my current plan is probably next year move to working 90% over 4 days and then in about 5 years time working around 50/60% over no more than 3 days a week, which I can do because I have an old pension that I can start taking then with only a relatively small reduction for taking it early.

For yoga and massage, how about joining a really nice gym or spa that offers these facilities? Talk to your hairdresser about the treatments or seek recommendations for a good salon. Cosmetic dentistry is a huge industry now, so definitely look into that too.

Is it that you've had a lifetime of being careful with money and just thought 'that's not for me'? Well now that's paid off and you have the freedom to not have to think that any more. I listen to a the Meaningful Money podcast which is about investing and they say this is common and a hard mindset to get out of, but it's something that you should definitely allow yourself to do.

https://meaningfulmoney.tv/2024/07/31/big-mistakes-not-spending-enough/

https://meaningfulmoney.tv/2022/11/16/strategies-for-spending-it-all/

How about designating a pot of money, eg a portion of your current savings/investments, and/or a monthly amount and then every time you think 'I wish I had nicer teeth but invisilign is so expensive' (for example) but if you have the money in your pot, just do it?

I know how you feel and it's something I'm currently struggling with. I was brought up by working class parents who were and still are very careful with money. It's just not in our nature to spend a lot on anything and bargain hunting is ingrained. But DP and I have a relatively high disposable income, we're mortgage and child free and both earn slightly above average, so we don't have to worry about money, especially as I have an excellent pension. But I especially find it hard to get out of the 'penny pinching' mindset. But today I took a baby step in that I've decided to buy a membership for a local place I love (Yorkshire Sculpture Park). I currently don't go as much as I like as it's about £10 to go, but for a whole £80 a year(!) I could go every day if I wanted to.

Like many other posters I would bite the bullet and drag myself to the hairdressers, hoping that knowing I can go again in 2/3 months without worrying about the money means I enjoy it more.
Treatments- massages, chiropractor, facials, i would spend a lot more on these things!

Streaming subscriptions; Disney+ etc.

I'm in your position and I spend money on monthly top quality beauty treatments. I also spend money on socialising- concert tickets, Xmas events, meals out and shows.