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Discussing finances with kids

22 replies

thelengthspeoplegoto · 05/07/2024 20:54

I'm curious to know. When do others chat to their kids about finances and household expenditure?
DC13 and DC9 are under the impression money grows on trees!
We aren't wealthy nor on the breadline. We both work hard and make our income go as far as possible. We don't have debt other than 4 years (ish) left on our mortgage.
My youngest was asking how much holidays cost. I said they vary greatly and continued to explain about our last holiday a couple of years ago which was all inclusive.
So, I'm wondering how much info you share with your kids?
Personally I'm quite happy to tell them how household expenditure works and how that leaves you with disposable income for the fun stuff. I think it's good for them to know just how much it costs to live.
I just don't want them telling their mates!! I'm not sure what age is a good and trustworthy age.

OP posts:
stressedespresso · 05/07/2024 20:59

What’s wrong with them telling their friends? Bizarre to describe that as untrustworthy.

thelengthspeoplegoto · 05/07/2024 21:00

Because they're young. I don't want everyone knowing the ins and outs of my finances. That isn't bizarre at all.

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TemuSpecialBuy · 05/07/2024 21:02

Start money education now.

they don’t need to know your mortgage is £2905 per month but they need to understand the key financial concepts.

we have started teaching our daughter basic concepts and she isn’t 3 yet.
once 3 we will start pocket money and spending savings and investing pots.

have a look on instagram there are some really good people on there and you can put together your own strategy to financially educate them.

my childhood savings formed a significant part of my first deposit (compound interest and all that jazz”) my parents were big on understanding value and financial literacy.

re the holiday I would “research” the cost of holidays together and explain budget setting and the variables involved.
eg
-if they want x hotel but are flexible and go in sept instead of august it’s 2k cheaper etc
-if your budget is strictly £3k you can book somewhere that has flights and accommodation for £2.9k because you still need airport transfers, days out and meals and that can’t be covered with £100

thelengthspeoplegoto · 05/07/2024 21:04

TemuSpecialBuy · 05/07/2024 21:02

Start money education now.

they don’t need to know your mortgage is £2905 per month but they need to understand the key financial concepts.

we have started teaching our daughter basic concepts and she isn’t 3 yet.
once 3 we will start pocket money and spending savings and investing pots.

have a look on instagram there are some really good people on there and you can put together your own strategy to financially educate them.

my childhood savings formed a significant part of my first deposit (compound interest and all that jazz”) my parents were big on understanding value and financial literacy.

re the holiday I would “research” the cost of holidays together and explain budget setting and the variables involved.
eg
-if they want x hotel but are flexible and go in sept instead of august it’s 2k cheaper etc
-if your budget is strictly £3k you can book somewhere that has flights and accommodation for £2.9k because you still need airport transfers, days out and meals and that can’t be covered with £100

Edited

This sounds great. I'll have a look on instagram.
Thanks.

OP posts:
Temporaryname158 · 05/07/2024 21:05

I don’t why it matters if they tell their mates how much the holiday was - they won’t care!

my children are 6 and 8, he eldest has a fairly good grasp on costs. When I get paid he likes watching me move money from one account to another, sees me put some in car savings, other money in holiday savings and I show them both what bills come out and have explained how much each is and what it pays for.

This stemmed from a conversation where I found out they through water and electricity were free. They were astounded to know what I paid for it and I compared it to age appropriate comparisons ie this many ice creams/days at a theme park.

you are doing them a dis service. Make them understand how many hour mum/dad need to work to earn a holiday/computer game/the weekly shop.

my kids now understand the value of money

honeyfox · 05/07/2024 21:09

It's never too early to start.

When I was a child I thought you got to pick your house for free when you were a grown up, I always wanted one of those old converted railway stations!

CuppeDramad · 05/07/2024 21:10

Find a local job with a salary. Then show them a salary calculator that shows how much tax and National Insurance is taken out and tell them what this funds, you could show them how to look things up like that on .gov websites.

Then go onto Rightmove to find somewhere to rent nearby or Spareroom so they can see how much a room in a house costs which is the same as what they have now.

Then ask them what they think comes out, some things you can point to like the light or something electrical that plugs in, you can make a game of how many appliances they can think of (I am aiming this bit more at the 9 year old) then talk to them about petrol and car services and MOTs, insurance, food, mobile phones, broadband etc.

I would tell them how much their shoes cost, their uniform, their toys etc. It gives them a reference, we played higher or lower with some things.

Mine knew before the end of primary how much a meal out cost and how much the weekly supermarket shop cost.

thelengthspeoplegoto · 05/07/2024 21:27

CuppeDramad · 05/07/2024 21:10

Find a local job with a salary. Then show them a salary calculator that shows how much tax and National Insurance is taken out and tell them what this funds, you could show them how to look things up like that on .gov websites.

Then go onto Rightmove to find somewhere to rent nearby or Spareroom so they can see how much a room in a house costs which is the same as what they have now.

Then ask them what they think comes out, some things you can point to like the light or something electrical that plugs in, you can make a game of how many appliances they can think of (I am aiming this bit more at the 9 year old) then talk to them about petrol and car services and MOTs, insurance, food, mobile phones, broadband etc.

I would tell them how much their shoes cost, their uniform, their toys etc. It gives them a reference, we played higher or lower with some things.

Mine knew before the end of primary how much a meal out cost and how much the weekly supermarket shop cost.

These are excellent ideas. Could look at different jobs with different pay scales.

OP posts:
RuthW · 05/07/2024 21:35

I think you should have started teaching them about household finances years ago.

Nsky62 · 05/07/2024 22:11

def, start young, prices online for food, meals.
watch smart meter if have one for say frying an egg simple stuff.
Then move on

OldTinHat · 05/07/2024 22:50

They're going to have far more interesting things to talk to their friends about than your family finances. Trust me!

I never knew how much household bills were when I was an early teen or before I left home. I learned quick because I got married at 21 and then DH and I had to sort out a mortgage and budget for bills.

With my DC, I was very open about finances. About working, essential bills when you leave home, budgeting, how much everything costs, utility and council tax wise, food, petrol, insurance - all costs realistically.

I did this along with other life lessons such as cooking a meal each week, washing up, changing their bed, taking the rubbish out.

What favours are we giving our children if we don't guide them into adulthood and responsibility without understanding economics, living, and taking care of yourself?

I'm 52 btw. Not completely out of touch. And I'm soooo proud of my DC.

DuckBee · 05/07/2024 23:20

All my kids had cash cards from the age of 11 when they can have them from a mainstream bank. A couple of years ago my eldest thanked me as it looks great on his credit report! They have all learnt to manage their money differently but it’s been their own lesson.

goneveryquiet · 05/07/2024 23:34

Why would you not discuss how the world works with your children?

caringcarer · 06/07/2024 00:37

I always taught my DC that bills cost money and they must be paid first before anything else. Then what is left over is savings and spending money so split into 3 piles. They have all always known we are not extravagant and we don't waste money by leaving lights on or cooking food then wasting it etc because if they waste money there will be less spending money.

GrazingSheep · 06/07/2024 00:41

Mine are young adults who are financially astute and know money doesn’t grow on trees.

Wedoourish · 06/07/2024 00:48

I as a teenager had absolutely no idea that my parents were wealthy. My children understood that they were lucky living where our house was..good schools.
They also understood that cash wise we were not wealthy and accepted it !
As adults they really recognise how hard we ensured their achievements

Weenurse · 06/07/2024 00:53

Showing them a local job and then expenditure related to living is a good start.
I also gave mine $50 a week once they started high school (this was in the days of pre paid mobile phones).
That money paid for school lunches, if they chose not to take their own, phones, outfits, outings, presents, hair dresser etc. I paid for school and sporting related stuff.
This continued until they got their part time jobs at 15.
It came about after a house meeting where I was complaining about chores not done. We all contributed to the mess, so we all contributed to the clean up.
Out of that we developed a chore chart that included one night a week to cook each and 2 nights to clean up as well as division of other jobs (washing their own clothes, cleaning their bathroom). Pocket money was decided on and paid after this discussion.
I actually think I paid less over the years than my friends who handed over cash for every gift, outing, shopping trip etc.
Mine are now in their 20’s and are very money savvy, both have traveled and own their own property (with the bank).
Good luck

thelengthspeoplegoto · 06/07/2024 22:37

Thanks for all of your info. My oldest has a debit card and gets pocket money each week. So learning a bit on a small scale. My youngest also gets pocket money but I haven't actually used their debit card yet so I think i'll start that in the holidays.
I've explained before how electric works and explained how the house works in circuits. I'm going to get them to take meter reading with me they tie that in with costs.
Lots of good ideas for fitting it into daily life.

OP posts:
SleepPrettyDarling · 06/07/2024 22:42

I read an article once on ‘opportunity cost’ ie if you spend money on x, it may remove the opportunity for you to buy y. I explained it at the kitchen table and the kids got it.

Girliefriendlikespuppies · 06/07/2024 22:46

I'm a single parent so I think my dd was always been aware of money and how much things cost as Ive always had to be careful with money.

Tbh I think it's been good for her, she's now 18yo and has had a pt job since she was 16yo, she is careful with money and likes to save.

It never occurred to me to be concerned about her talking to her friends about how skint we are tbh!

MrsBellamy · 06/07/2024 23:07

I did a budgeting task with mine during homeschooling/covid.

I used the coloured ice lolly sticks and wrote jobs and salaries, rent amount, car types and rough prices etc and costs of holidays etc then had the kids choose jobs and salaries and then lifestyle options and see how different options would affect their budget kids enjoyed it and I think helped them understand that they're in control of their budget to an extent by the choices they make.

Heatherbell1978 · 07/07/2024 06:42

Mine are 7 and 9 and although I try not to labour the point, every day we talk about money in some guise. When we're in the supermarket and they're asking for something and I'll say ok but can you keep it below 60p (for example) or I'll comment that I'd like a coffee at Costa but at £4 maybe I'll just wait until I'm home. That kind of thing. I tell them how much our holidays cost, how if we do x holiday we can't do y holiday. Why we prefer to drive the car we do rather than the fancy one. I buy most of their stuff from Vinted these days - 7 yr old wanted Converse for her birthday so I gave her the choice of a £40 new pair or £8 pair on Vinted plus £32 of other stuff. She chose the latter (thankfully!).

Were not struggling but for me it's important they understand that choices need to be made with money - they can't have everything they want - and if they want one thing it might mean not having the other.

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