pushing up daisies - providing for Dcs after i snuff it.

[PersephoneSnape]

I'm a single parent, three children (aged 12, 10 & 8) currently making my will and absolutely determined that my ex will not get his mitts on a penny. My estate would be in the region of £90500 if i snuffed it tomorrow in insurances etc (obviously i'm barely worth a penny actually breathing! ;)

do you think it's fair to divide my estate equally between the three children on the basis that they each inherit 1/3 of their share on their 21st birthday, to use as a deposit on a flat, or travel the world or whatever but the other two thirds is divided into university terms and paid as an allowance - if said child chooses not to go to university then the £ would go to cancer research..

is it morally right, or possible to try to exercise this much control from beyond the grave? or should i just accept that i'd be dead and it isn't my concern or problem?

I have appointment to draw up will in next few weeks and don't want to look a total arse in front of legal person.

What if they don't get in to university?
Or are not academic and want to work?

What about the 2/3 either being used for education or not inherited until an older age (eg 25 or even older), if you are looking for an incentive for them to have it earlier? Would need some thinking about the detail

the university clause is there as i didn't get the opportunity through lack of funding and they still inherit 1/3rd when they're 21 even if they don't go to uni. i probably (over) value a university education because of this and I?m not specifying that they have to do law or medicine ? they can do arts related subjects if they are so inclined. 2/3rds of them are academic at the moment (I do appreciate this can change) the third would probably want to do drama/dance ? again the provision would be there, so further education would be a better term  If they?re working, then they?re working. They wouldn?t need the money as much as if they were a student.
If the money goes to their father (who has no parental rights or responsibility at present and is unlikely to get them without a good fight from me) ostensibly to provide for them, it?d be pissed away in a couple of years and I?d be turning posthumous somersaults. I want to try and safe guard it for my children, not for their father IYSWIM

But if you put it into trust and assign a trustee other than their father then he can't get his hands on it

here is some info on trusts

Do you have anyone you can appoint trustee and make a discretionary trust so that they can give out the money as appropriate.

yes, thats where i'm going on it, countess D. i take it a trust attracts interest etc. what if the trustee dies before they come of age, do i choose a 2nd/3rd etc...?

I would say minimum of two trustees

riven, thats so sad. bumping for you for any ideas from people.

Who is going to raise the children? To be honest, they will need most of that money to pay for their living expenses. That is the main question you need to address.

Riven, I'm rushing out, but I can answer you. Will come back to this when I have collected the DCs.

Riven, what you should do, I think, is divide all your assets by 4 in your will, but set up a discretionary trust for your DD.

This should be a "live" trust if possible - ie, it should be in motion before you die. You need to noninate trustees and then whenever your DD needs something extra (not sure what disabilities she has. If she has learning disabilities, she may not have capacity (legally) in which case she will probably have a welfare guardian) the trustees are asked for money.

It is discretionary because they have the discretion to refuse the request, which would protect your DS, say, if a carer put in a request for a porsche! In reality, if it was something that would benefit your DS, the request would not be refused.

Many disability charities (Mencap, for example) have trustee departments, who will hold your trust and make the decisions. You will pay a small annual fee for this.

I am in Scotland, but I imagine that the situation in England wouldn't be so different. If you CAT me, I can send you a brochure about wills and one about trusts, both for parents of disabled dependents.

Hope this helps.

You much also bear in mind how much it will cost to raise them, and factor this in (generously) - for food/lodgings/childcare/giving up work - you are looking at thousands a year per child, and someone will need this to pay to bring them up.

Our DC will not get access to the money until they're 24. I think that 21 is a bit young to be honest. Before then, we have three financial trustees who can release money that they will need for general expenses, including university. My parents are the nominated guardians in our wills, and I wouldn't want them to be impoverished to look after our children.
Do you have any friends/family that you would trust to spend the money wisely? You might also consider that there are plenty of people who don't go to university, but still have fulfilling jobs. Is university really the be all and end all?