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Trying to get back on my feet after domestic abuse

5 replies

Beccibops · 17/06/2024 21:29

Me and my ex split up shortly after buying a flat together last summer. I gave up my housing association flat to be with him and ultimately this long term plan. He changed towards me as soon as we moved in. It was scary and ultimately has changed my life. My mental health is in tatters due to ptsd and I lost my job. My only option is to move in with my sister in Belfast. She is the only family I have and I need to get back on my feet. With no job I have no money to get over there and will need to get bedroom furniture to start with etc. I just feel stuck and the flat is currently up for sale and my ptsd makes it difficult for me to have viewings etc as my mental health is deteriorating each day. I need the support of my sister but don’t know how to get there. I did a loan request this evening for £2000 and got rejected. I feel like there is no way. For reference I live in London

OP posts:
RedHelenB · 18/06/2024 09:17

A flat in London will sell quickly and then you can get back to Belfast .

Crokepark · 18/06/2024 16:50

It sounds like the flat belongs to the boyfriend.

NoSquirrels · 19/06/2024 09:21

I’m really sorry, OP.

Is he living elsewhere now? Have you had any help or advice from domestic abuse charities?

Ultimately it’s better you didn’t get that loan because with no job you’d soon be in bother trying to pay it back. You need to get well and then tackle things. Are you getting treatment from the doctor?

You definitely don’t need £2K to buy furniture etc anyway. Stay out of debt.

VitalSigns · 19/06/2024 09:28

Has your ex moved out? I take you have claimed benefits to tide you over? Can you get an emergency budget loan from your county council? I'm not sure how that all works these days. Have you seen your GP about your mental health?

You only need to take small steps, day by day. Shower, eat, a bit of housework. That's literally it.. take a walk, go to the park. Rest, have a cup of tea. Be easy on yourself.

You will get to your sister. Sending ❤️

Kurtburt · 19/06/2024 20:42

You can contact DV charity but you will be placed in refuge accomodation and can wait long for council place. You lucky you have supportive sister let her help you, recover , 🙏 rebuild your life and mental health and move on. Take your time . Anyway try to contact DV charity for suppor they can direct you to counselling or even support financially

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