STBXH and I broke up a few months ago. When we were together he gave me a monthly payment which just covered rent, bills, food and a bit towards DS afterschool club. I work 32 hours per week, he works full time. We earn about the same as each other now, although as he works in sales he sometimes gets a store bonus which means he probably earns more than me. I bought the majority of DS things in the past and if I’d ask STBXH for any extra money towards it, he would always say he only had enough money left for his petrol and wouldn’t give me any more money as he’d already given me enough at the beginning of the month and would always say I had to learn how to be better with money (he took out an IVA behind my back as he’d got himself into serious debt. He only came clean about it when I confronted him with letters I had intercepted).
when we split I said that it would be nice to get a monthly payment from him to contribute towards DS for after school club. He said that we should each buy our own things for DS and he would pay a monthly amount into the after school club account(he’s already failed to do this for next month as he was paid earlier this week). I’m scared to ask him about monthly maintenance as he already owes me £350 from the deposit on our rental (I moved out and he used our initial deposit for his deposit on the house we lived in). He feigned poverty saying he’d need to sell a kidney to pay me back and that he could only afford to give me £50 pm from next month saying with his increased bills by living by himself means he hasn’t got much (I am doubting whether he will pay, so I put a payment schedule together and asked him to commit to paying it back).
should he be paying money towards DS? He has DS 6 out of every 14 nights and I have DS every 8 out of 14 nights (but also it works out more as I have DS every Saturday day as STBXH works Saturdays). He never takes DS out on his days with him, he prefers to have a ‘lazy day’ and let DS play on his tablet all day, so he can sit around and watch sport and have some beers and eat takeaways.
i think he would get extremely difficult if I said that I did a child maintenance enquiry and saw he should pay around £130 pm. I’ve been putting it off to keep the peace. I would appreciate any suggestions.