My fiancés gran died in 2012. She had three children, his mother, R, his aunt, S and a son J, with downs syndrome. In 2006 she wrote a will. It said that when she died, that R could choose live in her house to visit J in his care home until he died. She had to move in within 6 months. R was 19 when J was born and was not close to him but she convinced her mother she had seen the error of her ways and would make up for lost time. When Gran died R immediately tried to rent out Gran's house, and it became clear she had lied about wanting to develop more of a relationship with her brother. S and R fell out and R quickly stopped visiting J. The will created a trust. The trust must be ended when R either chose not to live in the house or J dies. When the trust is ended, one third of the sale price of the house should go to S, one third would go to J if alive or family members of the trustees choice if deceased. One third would go to R and her children but could be divided any way the trustees see fit. S and a solicitor are trustees. R did not move in or do any repairs and the house has sat empty for 11 years. S did nothing despite being a trustee as she stopped speaking to her sister and found the idea of trying to get the keys back too stressful. She struggles with anxiety. The solicitor went along with whatever she wanted. J has now died, and she has finally got the keys back. R had not seen her brother in over a decade and did not attend the funeral. S told her cousin that she intends to divide things 50/50 between her and her sister and will not involve grandchildren as ' it's best to keep things simple as the whole situation stresses me out '. The cousin pointed out that R is in her 80s and her half might get spent on care home fees but S said ' what R ends up spending her money on has nothing to do with me'. The only grandchildren are my fiance and his siblings as S could not have children. He is not currently speaking to any of his immediate family and neither is S, for unrelated reasons. We are currently saving up to buy a house, get married and have a baby. S has no other family, is mid seventies and lives in a 6 bedroom house in a rural area. We suspect she has some expectations that we will care for her when she is elderly as she has nobody else. As she is choosing to give half of the family trust fund to my fiancés abusive mother that he doesn't speak to, should we tell her we refuse to do anything for her when she needs care? Both his parents were abusive, and she knew that her sister's husband was battering her sister and the kids, but she chose to stay out of the situation as she didn't believe she should get involved in someone else's marriage/ family problems. Fiancé saw her once a year at Christmas despite the fact she lived 3 or four miles away, however he has built a relationship with her as an adult. We aren't sure if refusing to help her when she is old is fair, because she has one elderly cousin and us, but we are really disappointed she couldn't help us from the estate with the cost of a house deposit. We have not spoken to her about this directly as we do not want to be grabby plus she is very stubborn when she makes her mind up. When she is in her 80s and likely to need help, we will have small children.