New(ish) partner and debt

[clockhead]

Hi,

I am in a relationship with a great guy. We have been together for 18 months and things are going well. We are both mid 40's, divorced with one child each - both at uni. I like in my own house with a small mortgage. He has his own place. We have no plans to live together for the forseeable future, but I can see us perhaps cohabiting when we are post retirment

My issue is that I have a lot of debt that I am paying off and he doesn't know. I left my marriage with some debt, and then spent a year spending like crazy as a way of dealing with the stress of my divorce. Thankfully I saw sense and I now live on a proper budget and am clearing my debts at a decent but manageable rate. I owe 40K. It's on low rates etc and is now very well managed. It was higher but is now decreasing at a decent rate each month.

One of the plus sides of my divorce is that it gave me motivation to better myself and I am not in a senior position at work earning 80k. This is allowing me to repay the debt whilst having some money to enjoy life.

Do you think I need to tell my new partner about my debts? I am worried that it will change the way he looks at me.

You have no reason to tell him at present - you are reducing your debts and still managing to live your life comfortably. I reckon I could pay off £40k from an £80k salary in just a few years, you're not planning on cohabiting or any sort of merged finances for a decade or more. Zero need to confess your debts op!

You have no financial commitments with him so your finances are none of his business.

No it will be paid off before you even consider cohabiting anyway.

It's none of his business at this stage in your relationship. If you are still paying it off when or if you decide to live together, you may need to share that info. But it sounds like you have everything under control, so massive kudos to you. Keep going!