Combining Finances

[Irishstout]

I just wanted some ideas from some hopefully money savvy MNers

I'm due to get married next year and altered trying to figure out how to combine finances. We're both more than happy to get a joint account that we both get paid our salary into and then all household expenses come out of.

But how do we work discretionary spends? I don't want DP to see all my transactions starbucks habit and I don't want to see his as I'm sure he spends money on things I don't see the value of. This also works for gifts etc. If we both just spend out of the joint account then every transaction will be listed therefore no surprises.

So what do people do? We could each get a credit card which is paid off by joint account in full every month. Or do we get a joint account and keep our separate current accounts and pay a set amount in each month?

I'd quite like something that offers rewards to make some extra £ off but that market is a bit slow at the moment it seems.

So any ideas? What does everyone else do?

In your situation I would indeed get the joint account but keep separate accounts and pay an agreed amount to those accounts for personal spends.

DH and I would have been divorced within weeks if we combined our finances, as we have very different attitudes to money! I'm more relaxed about being overdrawn occasionally whereas he would go ballistic if I'd let our account go into the red.

So what we did was calculate our household costs - all the utilities, mortgage, costs to run the car, food shopping, insurances, etc - and then set up a joint account for that. We both put in an equal amount to cover all of those costs, plus a bit of a cushion for extra/unexpected costs, and then what ever was left from our salaries went into our own, personal current accounts.

It has been made easier for us as we've both earned roughly the same over the years. Sometimes I've earned a bit more, sometimes he has, but the difference in our incomes wasn't enough for us to consider anything but a 50:50 payment each month.

Thanks BIWI. We're pretty similar and I'm the higher earner by a large amount. If we did this either he'd be left with about 2k/month less money than me which isn't fair. I could just transfer money to him but it feels odly patronising to send him money.

(He's not a cocklodger before anyone worries, his job pays all our living expenses, except food, so his take home is very small in comparison)

We have our own account. Joint account is used for all bills etc. we worked out all the costs for running the house and pay proportional to our income as there is a pig difference. So for example you could pay 60% he pays 40% of the combined cost. Any unexpected expenses are typically paid 50/50 unless someone’s feeling flush or doesn’t have the cash at the time. It’s easy as we pay for our own cars and phones etc. the joint account is purely for the household bills. All other money is ours to do as we please with. Keeps the peace here

We have a joint account and each have separate personal current accounts. All income goes into the joint account; we get an identical amount each every month to our current accounts for personal spends. I successfully argued that my leg and bikini waxes were a joint expense 😁 but clothes, haircuts, Starbucks, evenings out when we're not together, that kind of thing, all come from our personal accounts. Both cars all come from the joint account.

We have different views on spending money, so this keeps us sane. DH is a miser and charity shop ninja; I am not.

FWIW when we started doing this I was by far the higher earner. We've now swopped, and long term it will change again.