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Original poster

New mortgage - Childcare costs

31 replies

LDA123 · 11/08/2023 19:26

So I’m a single Mum with 4 children, working 4 days per week and paying monthly childcare costs.

If I include the costs that I currently pay, it reduces my affordability so much that I can’t afford to buy a house. But on the flip side, they won’t include children benefit or child maintenance income. How is that fair?!

I have to stay with First Direct as in a fixed period.

Anyone been in a similar position?!

OP posts:
Unexpectedlysinglemum · 11/08/2023 19:30

You have a few options

  • lie and say a relative does the child care. This may be mortgage fraud though and also they might see the direct debit on your bank statement which you'll have to give.
  • wait to buy until after they have started school.
  • ask your ex to pay the maintenance straight into the nursey account (if he is trust worthy!) rather to you, so it doesn't show as 'your' bill and you can honestly say your childcare costs are low or zero (as he pays them)- this seems to make the most sense if the maintenance won't count towards mortgage affordability.
Littlegoth · 11/08/2023 19:33
  • ask your ex to pay the maintenance straight into the nursey account (if he is trust worthy!) rather to you, so it doesn't show as 'your' bill and you can honestly say your childcare costs are low or zero (as he pays them)- this seems to make the most sense if the maintenance won't count towards mortgage affordability.

I would do this.

Original poster
LDA123 · 12/08/2023 06:12

That’s what I was thinking I’ll have to do. Problem is, he hates my guts and won’t do anything to make my life easier. I will try though.

Nightmare.

OP posts:
Original poster
LDA123 · 12/08/2023 06:18

The kids are all at school - this is after school / breakfast club on days that I’m working.

OP posts:
Monkeylimas · 12/08/2023 06:22

Are you moving house? Is it just your name on the current and new mortgage? (Ie not joint at the minute). Is your new LTV the same or better than your current LTV (loan to value)? Are you borrowing less or the same as your current deal?

If the answer is yes to all four questions you may be able to speak to them as their risk is not getting worse.

Original poster
LDA123 · 12/08/2023 06:24

It just seems so unfair! The child benefit / child maintenance I receive, more than covers the childcare fees but I can’t include that!

OP posts:
WeWereInParis · 12/08/2023 06:55

LDA123 · 12/08/2023 06:24

It just seems so unfair! The child benefit / child maintenance I receive, more than covers the childcare fees but I can’t include that!

Have you spoken to a mortgage broker?

Original poster
LDA123 · 12/08/2023 07:26

I can’t move mortgage company as in a fixed period ☹️

OP posts:
cupofdecaf · 12/08/2023 07:29

You could pay the fee to leave the fixed period early. We did because it saved us money in the long term.

Original poster
LDA123 · 12/08/2023 07:40

The fee is £16,000 so I can’t do that 😭

OP posts:
Original poster
LDA123 · 12/08/2023 07:41

What about if someone else pays my childcare fees - say my Mum. Is that allowed?! Or would it be seen as a bit dodgy?

OP posts:
Original poster
LDA123 · 12/08/2023 08:08

Actually just phoned the bank, they said even if my Mum were to pay the fees, I’d still have to include them on the application.

OP posts:
Wenfy · 12/08/2023 08:14

No, they’re wrong. If your Mum paid the fees you don’t have to include them in the application. Make a complaint to First Direct if that’s the shitty info they’re giving you

PotteringAlonggotkickedoutandhadtoreregister · 12/08/2023 08:17

Do you use tax free childcare? (And if you don’t you should!) If your mum pays into your account then it won’t show up on our bank account…

loveyoutothemoonandtosaturn · 12/08/2023 08:23

I'm a bit confused, are you trying to move house? You say you can't buy a house, but also that you're in a fixed period? If you're just looking to lock in a new deal you won't need to complete affordability.

Daisy03 · 12/08/2023 08:25

Assuming you're porting current mortgage and increasing borrowing?

Absolutebeginners1 · 12/08/2023 08:29

Can you port mortgage and get the increased borrowing with a different lender? You can have both running together. Although you think a broker can’t help you I think it would be worth a try.

YukoandHiro · 12/08/2023 08:57

They will ask to see your bank details for three months so if you're paying for childcare you have to declare it as they will see it.

Can you wait until you get 30 free hours?

YukoandHiro · 12/08/2023 08:58

Oh sorry just seen this is after school costs. I think PP's solution of trying to get ex to pay directly so it doesn't appear as a cost for you is the best way

DelilahBucket · 12/08/2023 09:09

Has nothing been learned recently with people suddenly finding they can't afford to pay their mortgage? I've seen so much trotted out on here over the years with regard to mortgage applications - "don't tell them you're pregnant it's none of their business", "lie about your childcare costs", "lie about this, lie about that". Then something changes like err interest rates and a cost of living crisis and people are complaining they are going to be homeless.
There is a reason affordability checks are in place. Some lenders take into consideration child maintenance and child benefit, some don't. Perhaps look to a broker who can find one that does.

sadaboutmycat · 12/08/2023 09:14

LDA123 · 12/08/2023 06:12

That’s what I was thinking I’ll have to do. Problem is, he hates my guts and won’t do anything to make my life easier. I will try though.

Nightmare.

Yet another way in which women are penalised as they will count your home related costs but nothing else.

The system still sucks.

sadaboutmycat · 12/08/2023 09:14

That should say child related costs!

Barleysugar86 · 12/08/2023 09:25

My mortgage beginning of this year looked at six months of bank statements on all current accounts so they will see any regular payments you have for what they are. If you are in a fixed period with a mortgage somewhere surely you'd try and see it out as it must be much more favourable than what you could get at the moment interest wise.

strawberry2017 · 12/08/2023 09:45

If your mum is paying the fees and they no longer show on your accounts, and there's no payment going out of your account to your mum for the period of time they will ask to see statements then you wouldn't need to include the fees.
Realistically they will probably ask for 3 months of statements possibly 6 months.
If they payments aren't on those statements they have no way to prove you are paying them.

LadyLapsang · 12/08/2023 10:17

Are you trying to increase your borrowing by porting an existing mortgage and adding to it? I’ve always found First Direct great. I expect you bank with them so they will have a good overview of your financial situation over time.