Morning,
I used to post on here regularly but couldn’t remember login details so new account it is!!
i’m 41, 2dc and a dh. From the outside we look fortunate- decent house, jobs etc. we earn 104k per annum between is, 80k of which comes from me. I’ve always been cool with this. Dh works hard in a job he loves but it’s a key worker role and undervalued pay wise.
So we have a lot of debt.it was run up years ago and led to me having a bit of a breakdown 18 months ago. Since then we have taken charge of it and we are on track to be debt free by 2027. Not going to share figures etc but we were talking 10’s of thousands. We were/are both responsible- it just mounted up until I realised that something had to change.
i manage the money/bills etc and this is something that dh has always been 200% cool with. At times, it’s felt a lot of pressure as I feel as though he’s almost protected from the debt. When I’ve gotten stressed, upset about he doesn’t want to discuss it. He gets shitty when I bring it up in conversation… so I don’t! I just manage the budget and make th payments.
last week I left my laptop open and he saw our debt spreadsheet. He got really shitty about our debt Totals and said he didn’t know it was that high and basically accused me of being deceitful. I didn’t react well to this- I’ve lost count of the fucking times that I’ve tried to get him to talk about the debt,
im really upset, and he’s got into my head. I feel like I’ve deceived him but then I don’t think I have! Apart from this we are a happy couple. I feel really shit about everything again