Would you buy second-hand clothes for your tweens?

[Mazzy6]

When I was a kid my Mum used to buy me second-hand clothes on a regular basis. It was always decent/nice used things that she'd hunt down for me but I did feel ashamed sometimes that I wasn't wearing brand new clothes and I think it did affect my confidence sometimes. As a Mum myself I always wanted to buy my daughters new clothes. With the cost of living crisis, I am now looking to cut back on spending, and one area is clothes. I have two daughters, 8 & 10, my eldest is in need of some new items and I've been looking on second-hand clothes selling sites and have found a few bits I think she'll like. But I have so far not bought anything as I'm worried that (particularly my older daughter) will not want to wear second-hand items!

Am I over-thinking this?! Does anyone else buy second-hand clothes for their tweens, and does it work well for you? Also hints on any brands that would be fashionable for tweens - that we can search for would be useful, I feel like I have no idea what would be in or not! Thanks 😊

Yes. And for my teens. I just pop into charity shops and the odd decent item comes up.

Yes. I've bought my two second hand for years. mainly from Charity shops. I started buying from there mainly for eco reasons to stop stuff going to landfill, but it has saved me masses over the years.
They are now 15 and 17 and the 17 year old regularly goes for a charity shop "haul" and loves it as she can get quirky one off pieces.
I don't think second hand has quite the stigma that it used to have for the eco reasons.

DDs are similar ages and like to chose their own clothes... so why not look at the preowned sites and charity shops together?

DD2 likes going through DD1s outgrown stuff as well. Both go through their cousins. Another cousin goes through DD2s..

No but I don’t think there is anything wrong with it

Could you sell it to them as sustainability? Lots of kids understand recycling, etc. I buy a lot of second hand clothes for myself and for my kids when they were younger. I don't remember ever discussing it with them but they still buy second hand sometimes as young adults. I think selling it to them as preloved, avoiding landfill, etc they might look at it differently.

I buy second hand for my DD9 (going on 15) and for me. Never understood the snobbiness about this.

Absolutely yes! I always wash things through when I get them and just put them on dds bed, tell her I saw some things I thought she might like, and then she can decide. Anything she doesn’t like I’ve always been able to sell on, so there’s clearly a market for it.
If you have brands that you know the sizing on, I would stick to those.
It just makes it easier to judge if it will be ok for fit.
My dd isn’t really fashion conscious but when she was aged 8-10 or so I went for Joules, Mini Boden, Next, Hype, mainly through eBay and now Vinted.
They tend to last better secondhand without bobbling.
I found charity shops to be very limited in what they had for this age tbh. Might just be near me. Bundles of stuff on Facebook marketplace are worth looking out for, if you can collect easily. Often very cheap and if some of it is no good, you’ve not lost out.
I loved going through it all with dd and seeing what there was! Enjoy!

Yes, I have definitely done so and we often pass things between friends. It's much more eco friendly, there are enough clothes on the planet without encourage more. Work on their self worth not being related to new clothes or they will get into bad habits later in life when they need that 'hit' of new clothes every week. It does sound like you are more worried about what people will think ( hint- they won't know or care!) than your daughter's actually minding.

Thanks, yes the environmentally friendly/eco side of things probably will appeal to them both so that's a good way to look at it 🙂

I work with teens in an affluent area and they are always looking on depop and Vinted for expensive brands. I don't think there is so much snobbishness about second hand nowadays.

Yes! All the time. It’s a combination of cost and sustainability. I have a 16 year old and a 13 year old. I’d say about 50% of their clothes are second hand or pre loved or whatever you want to call it. Loads of mine are too. I recently got my 16 year old a nearly brand new Nike tracksuit from a local fb site. It’s in perfect condition and was £10. We were both delighted!

All the time. They're kids. Kinda non negotiable. New clothes to me are presents. And, I do think this is relevant, I could easily afford them. Clothes are just not something I want to spend/waste money on.

I agree. My 15 year old and his friends are always using depop and Vinted, trying to find "vintage" stuff. They were all very excited when one of them found a North Face gilet in a charity shop. There's no stigma attached at all.

I had a lot of second hand or hand me down clothes as a child but just presented with them. As in here you are this is a bag of stuff that cousin Caroline has grown out of. I got new clothes for Xmas or birthday.
When my DC were little I used to occasionally buy stuff from charity shops for them. As they've got older if I see something on fb or ebay for example I'll say would you wear this? And there is an element of choice. DD is 16 - since around age 14 has got a lot of her clothes from d-pop, vinted and boot fairs with her own money. She and her friends often go to a boot fair or a tour of charity shops.

Yes, but I think it's easier to "sell" it to them because I don't need to - I've always done it!

I get items I think they'll like, wash them and the day "a friend passed these on to us; do you want it/them". If they don't want it then I sell/swap/pass it on again.

Yes, but always have done. Whilst we are not particularly privileged most of 's uni friends are and all shop pirimarily from Depop, they love it.

DD12 loves Vinted, as do I

Hell yeah. I'm on a low income, and my nearly- 13 year old has massively got into brands and looking cool recently. If he wants to dress head to toe in Vans, it's going to have to be from Vinted- if he insisted on new, it'd be basic grey tracksuit bottoms from ASDA. No comparison really, and it's never bothered him a bit. He looks really cool nowadays actually- I'm quite proud of him!

It's not second hand it's vintage. Seriously, apart from Urban Outfitters at the moment (we shop together) she seeks out vintage shops and some are more expensive than new. DD16 and her affluent friends wouldn't look at the likes of Zara but love second hand.

My mum came to visit and took my tween daughter round the charity shops. I thought she would find it deathly dull and embarrassing (as I would have done at 12!) but she loved it. She referred to it as thrifting so must have picked up the terminology from Pinterest or some American tv show.

I've also recently bought her a few things from Vinted, there is quite an expensive brand associated with her sport and she was excited to have some of the clothing.

Absolutely. And they are happy to pick out clothes from charity shops and a great second hand kids clothes shop we have locally. My mum bought a lot of our clothes from jumble sales so guess I am used to it and have brought them up to be. But as said by pp, with the eco angle there is definitely less of a stigma than there used to be. And I will buy them labels second hand that I wouldn't pay for new.

All my DC (15) buys is second hand

My teen and tween have realised that their champagne taste and lemonade budget are not compatible! They loved Vinted provided it is virtually as new, or in excellent condition. They like the sustainability side and are wary of knock offs or back of the lorry brand new bargains thefts!

Always! Just call it vintage and they'll love it. Especially 90s or Y2K stuff. Or sometimes i buy new stuff on vinted, so its new with tags on but great prices ( maybe the seller missed the return date or something)

I buy some hoodies for 14yo DS on eBay. It started off during lockdown when he grew and shops weren’t open, and eBay was convenient. Had a great experience with it, and have done that since.

He has a mix of new and preloved, and the preloved is always in really good condition, though I do ask for photos if I feel that I need them before buying. I’ve bought Gap and The North Face hoodies and a Hype sweatshirt for him.

All in amazing condition, and I wouldn’t hesitate to do it again.

I also sell younger DS’ Frugi tops on a Facebook resale group. The people buying them are looking for nice designs and colours, they’re not necessarily doing it to save an enormous amount. My point being that they’re not solely motivated by spending less.

All the time!

Please don’t worry about them not wearing brand new clothes. As soon as something has been washed it loses that brand new look and feel. Nobody will know whether that ‘washed 10 times’ t-shirt has been washed 10 times by you after being bought brand new or whether it’s been washed 9 times by a previous owner and once by you 🙂