Joint account closure help - abusive ex

[JillyBoel22]

A couple of years ago I was with my ex partner who was emotionally and financially abusive. We had a joint account together as we lived together which we opened online during the pandemic.

when we split up there was an overdraft on the account which I paid off over the months following the split up. In this time ex had rang police on me for false reports - think writing himself cards and signing them from me and ringing the police for harassment. It was an awful time.

Once it was paid off I rang Santander to close the account and they said we can only close it by both parties going into the branch and stating they want it to be closed. I am obviously happy to do this - but don't want to get in touch with abusive ex to ask him to do the same at the risk of more police reports etc.

I explained this to the people at the bank and Santander stated they had raised it to the relevant place to get it closed and I got a text to say that my request had been resolved so I assumed the account had closed and didn't think anything of it. However now I'm receiving statements again for the account and they've gone back to saying we both need to go in branch (even though I was told it had been closed).

What do I do? I don't know anybody who knows ex to get in touch on my behalf. I am so stressed as I want to be financially de-linked ASAP

Has anybody got any experience of this or do I really need to get in touch with them? (Blocked on everything so don't even have a communication channel to use and bank won't contact on my behalf)

Just to add the account is blocked so no transactions can be made at this point. They won't allow me to go in and remove myself and leave it in just his name without his permission either

Write them a letter and explain the whole situation. I was in the same situation, wrote a letter signed and explained that I cannot contact him etc and they closed the account on that basis. It needs sorting as you are financially linked so need to get it closed so his financial conduct doesn’t affect you. X

You need to write a complaint and they'll get it sorted. Make it clear you've explained the situation to them.

If you need your address to stay private from your ex, you're as well not sharing it with Santander if you haven't already. Banks are notorious for slip-ups in that regard.

I had exactly this with Santander - very poor device from them, especially when there was DA & police involvement.

I went in to a branch & was advised that I could put the account in to dispute , wfuvh would freeze it & he would not be able to use it.

Or close the account by transferring the balance/funds to my account.

The threat of the latter seemed to encourage him to sign the paperwork to close it.

Good luck - it was a horrible process & mine was extending the overdraft without my agreement.

Thanks everyone, really helpful advice and reassuring that you've managed to get it closed outside their usual process. It is just so difficult to try and explain to them and frustrating to keep getting 'computer says no' responses! I have escalated to complaints team so will come back with an update if I manage.

I also haven't shared my new address - they also said any correspondence has to have both names on if they sent me any letters! So frustrating

Hi all just to update they have refused to close it without documentation from police/refuges (which I hadn't accessed as went home to my mum). Bit stuck now! :(

I had this with Santander in 2007. Nothing I could say or do resolved it. In the end it was made a condition of the financial settlement that he would not have funds released until he signed closure forms. Took 3 years to resolve, it was his last hold and connection to me and he wouldn't give it up. Shocking that the banks haven't moved with the times to not collude with DV perpetrators.

I'm hoping you got it all sorted but could you get advice on this from Women's Aid, your local one may have a solicitor who can advise and then you could get the letter that the bank are looking for to close the account?

I feel your pain. An ex of mine went to prison afrer we split and it was exhausting trying to explain why he couldn't pop into branch and I didn't fancy waiting 8 years. In the end they agreed to freeze it, which wasn't ideal but they just wouldn't close it without his approval and considering there was a risk to my life if I contacted him, that didn't work for me.