I am really struggling at the moment and really don't know where to turn. I am self-employed and started my business two years ago, just at the time of covid. It is the type of business that does take a while to build and my earnings have been steadily increasing, but I am making less than 20K at the moment for this year. I have been relying on savings, which have more or less now run out due to cost of living. I have put so much time and effort into the business and it has been peaks and troughs in terms of earnings, but generally progressing in the right direction.
The last few months have been improving customer-wise. I have had some quieter times but my business is slowly growing. The last couple of months I have been getting fewer and fewer enquiries, understandably given the current circumstances. I have no work currently booked for after Christmas and have enough money to last me for 2-3 months. I have built up about £4K on my credit card. What is really worrying me massively is that I have just received an unexpected bill of £5K for outstanding tax. It relates to back when I was employed and I don't know what to do. I don't have that kind of money available and don't have any assets, other than my house, which I could sell. There is no way that I can pay the bill in anything other than a long timeframe, as I don't possess that amount of money.
To make matters worse, I have severe cPTSD from childhood trauma which limits my ability to look for a job. One reason for going self-employed is that I struggle with working for other people and was signed off sick with anxiety for the last three months that I was in my previous job, before starting my business. I had to end contact with my 'parents' a few years ago, to protect my wellbeing. So, I have no family who I could ask for financial support. My cPTSD means that I am prone to isolate and I find it difficult to ask for help, and don't have any close friends. So I am basically on my own. Just looking online at part-time jobs gives me panic attacks, as I had such a horrible experience with a toxic boss in my last role.
I have been really careful with money since leaving work - I have been cutting my own hair for the last three years, no new clothes and the only money I have been spending is on food, so a really frugal existence. There is no heating on in the house, which is now very cold, and my fear is potentially losing the house. I feel at a complete dead end and completely fed up with having to struggle so much, especially having to do so alone. I am single with no children and not eligible for UC, or any support that I am aware of.
I just feel so overwhelmed and don't know where to turn.