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Struggling

1 reply

Gjals · 01/11/2022 14:19

Hi !

So a bit of history, I've always worked full time in half decent jobs, I worked in police control room on decent money full time until I had my little girl who is 11 month now. I couldn't get the shifts/hours needed there to adapt to my new mam life so have a new job as a medical receptionist.

I have had to start working part time, and the receptionist role is pretty low paying - not far above min wage. I can't afford childcare full time. I use gran and grandad 2 days a week which I know is really lucky and I'm so grateful for that. So anyway, my pay has massively reduced, but so has my reliability. In the last few months where I've been brand new at my job, I've had to take unpaid time off for nursery closing and my little one having the flu ( not a cold, the flu !) And stomach bugs etc. It's been a nightmare. This has gone down as sick leave as I'm not entitled to parental leave, as I haven't been there a year yet. This means I get even less a month, and frankly look shit to my colleagues and employer. I mean I'd be annoyed at me if I was them. But what are you supposed to do???? What does everyone else do? Is there a secret I don't know about?

I've never been in such a financial struggle either. My partner is self employed and works HARD , in a physically demanding dirty long hours job which for some reason he enjoys, but he's in his 40s and has put his back out a few times recently so has had a few days here and there losing money.

I have an appointment with job centre to see if there's anything they can do to help but from what I've researched online there isn't. But I've never been on benefits or anything so don't know how it all works.

I love being a mam but God I wish I could go back to working full time shifts in the control room so we could have some money in and feel 'safe' instead of literally living week to week .

Is this the same with everyone or have we just messed up ??!

OP posts:
Testina · 01/11/2022 16:57

I assumed you were a single parent for your first 2 paragraphs!

Baby’s father needs to step up and share the time off when ill. You can’t only make decisions on who is earning more, but the overall impact to each person’s immediate work prospects and career progression. Especially if his role isn’t physically sustainable.

When you say you can’t afford childcare - do you mean you really can’t afford it, or more that you feel most of your salary would go on it? If the latter, take the long view - sometimes it’s better to keep a job with prospects even if for 2 years waiting for funded hours to start you’re not making much.

Surely a 24/7 control room is a good option for finding shifts to fit around your boyfriend? Some nights and weekends? Did you actually put in an official flexible working request at the time?

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