Handhold please.

[IndigoKat]

Hi, I'm sorry I don't know who to turn to. I don't live in the UK anymore and have no friends where I live. My family and I are healthy, I'm very grateful for this but we are in dire straits. The costs of living have been rocketing, we've always been careful with our spending but our wages aren't sufficient anymore. We can't pay our bills, my husband and skip lunch. Diner is made of food purchased via "the Good to go"app. Another reminder just came through the letter box. DH and I try to keep appearances so not to worry the kids but it's hard. Apparently we earn "too much" to get help!.. Sleepless nights, anxiety... I don't know, can you please send my family some "positive vibes"? Any prayers? I've tried to do online surveys and have applied to do copywriting, proofreadings,etc...but no luck so far. I'm lost. Are things ever going to get better? I'm not suicidal but I can't see the end of this nightmare.

Is there any way you could use airbnb for some extra income in the summer holidays? A friend in Holland does this, though they are lucky in terms of spare bedrooms and good location. For example, could you all decamp to grandparents for the summer holiday and rent out the whole house?

It's difficult to help when you're not in the UK and we don't know the rules in Holland or what help is available but the general principles are probably the same.

Keep paying your mortgage and council tax type bill if at all possible. The penalties for not paying are harsh. But is there any chance of downsizing and/or moving somewhere cheaper to cut your living costs so they are more manageable?

Don't skimp on food or energy to pay unsecured debt. Stop paying the latter seek help from a debt charity, Citizen's Advice or similar. In the UK, the advice is usually to pay a token payment of £1-10 pm to show willing while a resolution is sought.

Check you are receiving all financial help you are entitled to. 2300 euro for a family sounds quite low so are there any benefits you can claim?

Have a look at Moneysaving Expert. It's UK based but the process might be helpful, although you'll have to look for local debt charities or talk to your creditors to look for a resolution.

www.moneysavingexpert.com/loans/debt-help-plan/

Thank you for your reply, while you are right about some of the advice not necessarily applicable in Holland, I think getting a second job, car-share and see what we can about the mortgage payments and/or moving to another part of Holland seem to be a good plan. I also like your idea of talking to a money saving/budget expert, that's a great tip, thank you!

Thank you, that would be a great idea but we have no family so that's not possible. But I keep this in mine if our situation allows it in the future; this would be a great way to earn extra money.

Thank you for your reply and advice. I agree the laws can differ but the rules are quite similar in this matter. Regarding the help that is available, to be honest, I have not look at it deeply yet but we have come to the point where we must do this urgently. You mention some great ideas and moving to another part of the country is something we are now going for.
I'm not sure about being able to get benefits but it's worth asking anyway.
Someone else mentioned Moneysaving Expert, it's indeed a great site.
I am also going to get in touch with local debt charities and talk to the creditors; hopefully they will come to an agreement. Thank you for your great advice!

Would it be cheaper to rent than pay your mortgage? It may be you have to let your house go if it's unaffordable.

I'm quite shocked that €2300 is 2 peoples full time salaries & not entitled to benefits.

Have you been to the gemeente? The nuclear option would be to declare bankruptcy- and then your wages would be garnished for 3 years down to (???) - was 1100 10 years ago for a single person. But once you’re there, you get social support. Bugger all for juggling.

not sure about rents Helen - like the UK, generally dearer than buying. 😔

I lived in the cheapest part of NL and a 1-bed flat was 600/month - so if she’s paying 1000 and getting a 30% tax rebate there’s not much in it.

OP - hats off you for getting this far frankly. Our income was more than yours and our mortgage smaller - we still couldn’t make ends meet and my friend pulling in 5+/month couldn’t either. We both came home.

Yes, Belgium is on our list of options, especially after what you said. I did not know about the vouchers and the cheaper housing as I need to dig into it.

Regarding their taxes and government, I don't think it can be worse than the lot we've been cursed with here ;)

Mobile phone cost is horrendous. Presumably for 2 adults and 2 children? Secondhand phones, SIM only, would have been far cheaper.

No, renting is as expensive as paying a mortgage, if not more expensive.

Do you both work full time? Invariably when I see a lot of these posts one half of the household isn't working full time. What is the scope for second jobs? Unfortunately needs must at the moment

Wages are very low and it does not look like things are getting better for most of the people in NL.

Asking for advice, and help at the gemeente is another good idea. We are trying to avoid having to declare bankruptcy, hoping we still have the choice not to though.
Thank you for your kind words but it is very hard. Apparently, there has never been such a high number of people leaving NL, no wonder though.

Yes, there are the total costs for the four of us. We'll switch to sim only as soon as our current contract ends.

You guessed it right, I only work part-time, well, 4 days a week and DH works full-time. I've asked my boss to give an extra working day but no luck so far so I'm looking for a second job.

Internet seems really high too, is that the norm there? Can it be lowered?

No, I live between The Hague and Amsterdam (near Leiden). I'm going to the town council on Friday and see if they have the equivalent of the buurtteamamsteram. Thank you for your tips!

I would like to thank you all for kindly taking the time to read my messages and for giving me valuable pieces of advice. You helped me open my eyes and realise what's been going on regarding the expenses, especially the mortgage! This might sound stupid as I knew about these expenses but seeing them on the screen and reading your comments actually open my eyes.
I will discuss all this with DH and we will follow your advice, starting with renegotiating the mortgage payments.
You all gave me strength and inspiration. I think that's one of the things I miss the most about the UK:
the kindness and empathy of the British people. Best wishes to you all x

ps: I hope I did not forget to reply to anyone, if so then please accept my apologies.

I am in Belgium and cost of living is very high, I would say same as NL. But there are tax advantages for having children. Do you get child benefit? Private health insurance is also normally offered by your employer and I only pay extra €60 a month to cover my whole family (orthodontist is covered 100%!) But life is no picnic generally in Wallonia - taxes for bins, car, council tax are huge !!

I had family in the Netherlands, am starting to understand why they all moved to different countries.

Are you working part time on those 4 days? So not 80% of full time.
Because I thought Dutch minimum wage was around 1750 EUR a month?
Both of you working full time will make more difference than cutting small things - though that’s good too.
What is the employment situation like in your area? If your work can’t offer you 5 days (or it’s going to be 5 short days) then I’d say look for a different job.
Good luck!

Tax is circa 50%… plus obscure taxes such as “coastguard tax”.

Tax of 50% from £0?
Before I posted I did check a website calculator in case it was obviously tax. I don’t know if it’s reliable, but it was nowhere near 50% at this warnings level.