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Original poster

question for wigandrobe

25 replies

nailpolish · 23/11/2004 13:34

hi

hope you dont mind me asking a workie thing, thought this may be your area

my mum and dad separated over 10 years ago, my dad was a nasty piece of work. they never divorced - my mum feels sorry for my dad and thinks he would be upset!

anyway, my mum doesnt have a lot, but she has a house and an isa or something, dont know the details (but bro does) and we were wondering, does my dad have any claim on my mums house when she is gone? of course this applies to my mum having a claim on my dads house and money (which he has a lot of) although my mum says she wants nothing from him. neither do i for the record, so can i refuse anything he leaves me?

i keep saying to mum that she needs to get a divorce from dad and she may one day. just wanted to know where she stands.

thanks!

OP posts:
Original poster
nailpolish · 23/11/2004 14:05

bump

OP posts:
krisked · 23/11/2004 14:21

Nailpolish sorry for being nosy but noted that you bumped,

Not an expert in this field but i think that whilst they are still married, he has a claim on everything and vice versa. If anything happened to your mother it would automatically go to him before being passed to you....

Please someone correct me if i'm wrong

ladymuck · 23/11/2004 14:31

Has your mum made a will?

As for refusing a bequest, yes you can, or you can take it and give it to charity - He would be dead so wouldn't know or care either way.

Original poster
nailpolish · 23/11/2004 14:46

a will would be an obvious thing to do but i dont think she has.

i really really hope you are wrong krisked but i suspect not. my dad getting the house my mum loved so much (and the only thing she has ever had of her own) would be cruel. i just wish she would be brave and ask for a divorce

OP posts:
krisked · 23/11/2004 15:21

I think she will have to...sorry friends of mine just went through a similar experience and their mum had made a will. The only problem was her ex contested the will or something and now theres some sort of battle to prove her intentions of when she wrote it compared to those when she died etc but it looks likely that they will all get a piece.

krisked · 23/11/2004 15:24

Sorry the other thing that comes to mind is if he has paid anything into that house...........If she can be brave enough to ask for a divorce then that will clear things up. Sounds like she has good support in you to help her through.

It might also be worth finding out if theres any type of law that says if you have been seperated for more than so many years the divorce is clearer????

Original poster
nailpolish · 23/11/2004 15:25

im going to try and get some more info on wills

thanks

also, would she have to 'ask' dad for a divorce? i think shes frightened to, or as i said, she feels sorry for him. (hes all alone now)

OP posts:
Original poster
nailpolish · 23/11/2004 15:27

i thought so too about years of separation etc.

no, he hasnt paid a penny into her house

OP posts:
Freckle · 23/11/2004 15:49

If they've lived apart for more than 5 years, your mum is entitled to a divorce whether he wants one or not.

Even if she does get divorced, a will is a must anyway. Do urge her to make one.

Original poster
nailpolish · 23/11/2004 15:50

thanks freckle, that is good to know.

mn is so helpful

OP posts:
WigandRobe · 23/11/2004 19:07

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lavender2 · 23/11/2004 19:36

sorry but AM NOT trying to highjack this thread at all...but wondered if I could ask Jane a very quick question..

My ex-boss has not responded to the phonecall from IR and a month has now passed...and he's only got 6 days to resubmit his second evidential statement for the tribunal for the 14th Dec. Would this make more problems for him in the court at all?....

WigandRobe · 23/11/2004 19:55

Message deleted

lavender2 · 23/11/2004 19:58

thanks Jane...one final question...if he did quit his evidence would that make it hard for him to be found not guilty of constructive dismissal and not paying his contributions..(basically don't want the case to turn up with me as wrong as not really)...like I said before if you've any gardening questions or things on music and stuff only to happy to advise(to all mn's too).

lavender2 · 23/11/2004 19:59

rabbit out the hat?

WigandRobe · 23/11/2004 20:08

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emmatmg · 23/11/2004 20:18

Sorry to hijack, but I just have to say how fasinated I am at your posts wigandrobe. If I see your name I just have to read it.
You've given some brilliant advice on here and I'm sure saving a fair few poeple money and time.

Ok, I'll stop now before you think I'm a stalker

WigandRobe · 23/11/2004 20:21

Message deleted

Original poster
nailpolish · 23/11/2004 21:02

thanks for responding

does mum actually have to approach dad to get the divorce or does it get done through a lawyer?

sorry, you must think im stupid.

she keeps saying to me that she will be entitled to half dads pension (which is pretty substantial my brother says) although i doubt very much that she would want it. i think in dads will he is leaving everything to my brother, but as i said i dont think mum has one. how does she go about making one btw?

and i got a bit brainmushed at the bit when you said about the cost of the divorce - who will have to pay? (and can you say a guess figure?)

i hope you dont mind all these questions - i know at this time of day you are trying to relax and/or spend time with your family.

thanks again x

OP posts:
WigandRobe · 23/11/2004 21:36

Message deleted

Original poster
nailpolish · 23/11/2004 21:44

wow! thats cleared up loads and really put my mind at rest. you are fab.

i think she will be entitled for legal aid, she has nothing to her name except her house (she just has a small mortgage left to go)

the cost isnt as much as i thought it would be which is a relief.

if i approach mum with all this info i think she will be less frightened of doing the deed, as it were.

thanks again, this has been on my mind for a few years now

OP posts:
WigandRobe · 23/11/2004 21:46

Message deleted

peskykids · 25/11/2004 14:30

I think we should start a wigandrobe appreciation society (if thre isn't already one) What a good egg!

Original poster
nailpolish · 25/11/2004 21:42

she is fab, its true

OP posts:
WigandRobe · 26/11/2004 09:13

Message deleted

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