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Original poster

Nearly 18 year old

35 replies

Jogrighton · 23/02/2022 17:40

Hi all,

Sorry if it's been asked before.

My son turns 18 end of March. I have saved for him over the years in a junior isa. He is unaware of the amount but will get £8000.

I would like to withdraw it and continue to keep it. I will use some of it for his 1st car.

I don't think he is currently mature enough and proved that on multiple occasions. He is very driven by clothing, Nando's, impressing his girlfriend. I love him dearly but he is in nob mode currently!!!

He is at college and doesn't work, every job I suggest he turns his nose up/makes excuses. I was paying an allowance but reduced this recently in an attempt to kick start some drive!!!

Any advice? I think I know the answer but I don't want to let it drip through his fingers 😫

OP posts:
nannynick · 23/02/2022 17:46

It's his money, he got control at age 16... though somehow you managed to avoid him knowing that. At 18, they will write to him.

I would have a chat about how there is a pot of money which is his which for his own good should continue to be invested. Maybe he would like to open a Lifetime ISA to start saving towards a home deposit. Maybe he would like to start a pension.

Could you start by getting him interested in finance... maybe reading books, listening to audiobooks and podcasts, watching YouTube videos?

HereWeGo22 · 23/02/2022 20:15

I will be in a similar position though I have a number of years until my DS reaches 18. I've been saving his CB and money gifted to him since he was born. By the time he reaches 18 (for an 18 year old) he will have a substantial amount of money (all being well). Though I appreciate it is his money I'd be absolutely gutted if he frittered it away. His is in an account locked until he his is 18. Ideally I'd love to keep it until 21 or give it him as a house deposit but unfortunately I think once he is 18 it will be his. It's not a case of me not wanting him to have it. If it was I wouldn't bother saving it for him. But I do really worry how an 18 year old receiving £30k will use it

HereWeGo22 · 23/02/2022 20:18

I do like the ideas above though about him continuing to invest in it or for a pension. But does stuff like that really interest an 18 year old. I look back now and wish I'd have been more sensible at 18 and saved harder and properly contributed to my pension.

nannynick · 23/02/2022 20:30

Alas a pension is not something that is likely to appeal to them. Though anything towards that is better than none. Even if they have no income they can put £2880 in to a pension, per tax year.

They may be more interested in putting money towards a home, towards a car, towards driving lessons, towards some sort of sport they participate in, maybe towards something educational.

Invest some, spend some, but mostly invest it in themselves though improving their skills, making them more employable.

HarrietSchulenberg · 23/02/2022 20:38

My 19yo got £6k when he turned 18 and I persuaded him to reinvest £4k of it in an ISA, and the rest into an account he could access if he needed to emergency funds while at university. He did spend £600 on stuff he just wanted but it was his money and, as the bulk was reinvested, I'm fine with that.

NewcastleOrBust · 23/02/2022 20:39

I've got an eighteen year old dd and everyone I know who paid money into their child's CTF regrets it. They have all pissed it up the wall on stupid stuff. It's just gone to their heads because it seems like a huge windfall.

One of them paid for a lads holiday for him and his mates. My friend is devastated as she thought when was doing a wonderful thing for him saving all of this money for eighteen years.

My dd only had about £600 in hers as we didn't put in anything at all and we got her a ISA on her 18th and she transferred it over into that on the day of her 18th. I really think if she'd had even a day to think about it she would have spent it all in Asos.

BantersaurusSex · 23/02/2022 20:45

My 17 yo will get hers in summer. She will presumably spend it getting pissed in Ibiza. Fortunately we never added to it - just stuck the original amounts in a share account which is now worth about £2,600. I only told her about its existence last week, having successfully hidden it until now. XH and I never topped it up, on the grounds that we preferred to invest anything that came to the children via family in such a way that they couldn't get their paws on it until we thought they were mature enough to do so. Which will be in about 2067 in the case of this particular child.

HalfShrunkMoreToGo · 23/02/2022 20:49

I have a Junior ISA in DDs name that I put a small amount in monthly, then an ISA in my name that I put a decent amount into. The plan is that everything I save in the ISA will be hers one day, but it will be one day when I decide she's ready for it. The JISA she'll get control of when she's 16 and it will have enough for driving lessons and/or a cheap car if she's sensible enough to use it for that.

HereWeGo22 · 23/02/2022 20:52

2067 made me laugh.

Fastforwardtospring · 23/02/2022 21:03

DS gets a CTF and a savings account I’ve never told him about, the CTF I’m hoping he will turn into an ISA, and to encourage him to save, we will try and match eventually for a house deposit, his savings account has all his birthday cheques paid in ( I used to let him have any cash but banked cheques), he can do as he pleases with this, I’m hoping he can have fun with this but save the other.

Original poster
Jogrighton · 23/02/2022 21:15

Thanks for all the replies and suggestions.

I'll try and reason with him to spend a bit but then save the rest!

He can't see past his nose at the moment so pensions will seem a long way off, but I'll mention that too.

OP posts:
Fiddlersgreen · 23/02/2022 21:38

It’s so hard as although they are officially adults, they do not act like it (ime)
My DS is about to turn 18 and he had around £3k in his CTF. I think I’ve managed to convince him to buy a car (we are paying for lessons) as otherwise he will just fritter it away on food/drink/cinema trips

MissMaple82 · 23/02/2022 21:39

I wouldn't tell him about it. Withhold any letters, he will blow it all

Cocomarine · 24/02/2022 14:39

A pension isn’t necessarily the right investment. Arguably a LISA makes much more sense - still get tax relief, but a higher limit and better accessibly, and good aim (house purchase).
I actually think talking about pensions will put him off listening to you.

I’d be honest how much he has. Sure you can hide the letter, but his friends will soon prompt him to ask you. Tell him you’re worried it’ll get spent quickly. Not in a “you’ll blow it you dick” way, that won’t engage him. Just in a more neutral “it’s easy to burn through” way. Tell him you’ve got LISA info for him. Plant the seed that it’s for further investment, or a car / driving lessons. Maybe even suggest a fun purchase. See what happens when you start by trusting him to have adult thoughts about it with you.

Then… when he starts to burn through it anyway, cancel his allowance altogether!

Either set that aside if you can afford to, for when he grows up - or just stop giving it.

GeneLovesJezebel · 24/02/2022 14:41

Isn’t there an Isa where you are saving for a house deposit and the government puts some in too ?
Perhaps he could be persuaded to put it/some in there

SimpleShootingWeekend · 24/02/2022 14:51

If he puts £4K into a LISA the the government will put in another £1k. That might incentivise him to save. Technically he can put £4K in this tax year and another £4K next tax year and have £10k altogether towards a house deposit. I think it’s more palatable to save a large amount of he can also spend a big chunk, so £4K LISA, £3k for car and driving lessons and £1k spiv money.

Cocomarine · 24/02/2022 14:52

@HereWeGo22

I will be in a similar position though I have a number of years until my DS reaches 18. I've been saving his CB and money gifted to him since he was born. By the time he reaches 18 (for an 18 year old) he will have a substantial amount of money (all being well). Though I appreciate it is his money I'd be absolutely gutted if he frittered it away. His is in an account locked until he his is 18. Ideally I'd love to keep it until 21 or give it him as a house deposit but unfortunately I think once he is 18 it will be his. It's not a case of me not wanting him to have it. If it was I wouldn't bother saving it for him. But I do really worry how an 18 year old receiving £30k will use it
So if you have a number of years to go, why haven’t you switched your saving for him into an account in your name?
Cocomarine · 24/02/2022 14:53

@GeneLovesJezebel

Isn’t there an Isa where you are saving for a house deposit and the government puts some in too ? Perhaps he could be persuaded to put it/some in there
Yes, it’s a LISA / Lifetime ISA which several replies mentioned.
Porfre · 24/02/2022 14:55

This is why I'm saving for them in my own name

gogohm · 24/02/2022 14:55

My DD's had over £13k at 18 (not ctf as too old) neither of them have been stupid with it, they knew it was for university

HereWeGo22 · 24/02/2022 17:43

Because I never really gave it another thought until this thread. Plus children's accounts are a better interest rate aren't they.

I have 11 years until he is 18. I will see how he is then. But so far he is very sensible with money and saves everything he is given/gifted. This could change though when he hits teens

Cocomarine · 24/02/2022 17:50

@HereWeGo22

Because I never really gave it another thought until this thread. Plus children's accounts are a better interest rate aren't they.

I have 11 years until he is 18. I will see how he is then. But so far he is very sensible with money and saves everything he is given/gifted. This could change though when he hits teens

Ah, your comment doesn’t sound like it’s a revelation to you! I’m surprised that now you’re aware of it and he’s still only 7, you’re still considering letting yourself get into this position too. How can you think a 7yo saving money now is any decent indication?! I’m not sure what you mean by children’s account interest rates being better - have you looked? If you’re using a S&S based JISA or CTF, it’s not relevant anyway. I’d happily give up a percentage interest point to protect money being spunked at 18 anyway!
Gherkingreen · 24/02/2022 17:54

My DS is in the process of putting his CTF £ into a LISA and in the meantime, it's sitting in a Premium Bonds account.
He would also love to spend it on a car but he's sensible and we've talked through the options and advised him that a LISA is the absolute best way for him to save for a property in the future.
They need to learn about saving planning and investing and this is the ideal opportunity to teach them.

JodyAteApples · 24/02/2022 17:59

We never added to the CTF just the original cheque and let it sit. We did save into a bank account in the child's name but completely controlled by us. I thought when he turned 18 the bank would notify him but they said that wasn't how it was set up. I think Dh was advised at the time that this was a better way.

Even the most sensible of children can prove that when they have money they can lose that sensible attitude.

HollowTalk · 24/02/2022 18:01

So can't the money be taken out by parents before they're 18?