Children and money

[Arabellasmum]

Last night, my 6-year old daughter asked that she would now like to get paid for doing chores at home. I had thought about doing this before but I thought it was interesting that she thought about it and asked.

I couldn’t help but wonder if she really thought about this on her own though or if there has been any events in school or discussions amongst her peers that triggered this.

I’m curious to know if any of your children have made similar requests. Kindly share your stories if you don’t mind! And if this is something you already do, how is it going and what are the pitfalls to watch out for?

Luckily, she’s only asked for £1 per chore (down from £2 after a 5-second negotiation) as she thinks that’s all she really needs anyway - at least for now.

Nope, not here. Aged 6, making their bed, tidying their room, putting dishes in the kitchen are expected as being a part of a family.
Pocket money should cover a 6 year olds "expenses".

I believe a certain amount of 'chores' should just be normal family responsibility and don't need 'paying for'. Otherwise DC might expect pocket money for just basic things like making their bed, keeping their room tidy and clearing up after a meal. Bunt perhaps paying for 'extra' jobs might help to understand the link between 'working' and 'earning'.

We didn't pay our DS for doing basic chores around the house (ie; looking after his room done badly ) - I think we once offered some pocket money for mowing the lawn but he just said 'no thanks'.

It depends on how you define chores. I do think it is good for children to take an active part in helping their parents take care of the family.

If it were me, I would expect certain chores to be done without reward, but extra chores to be paid for. My children are adults now but one of the problems I faced with rewards was that they opted out if they were feeling lazy. If they were flush with birthday money they felt justified in not doing the chores.

My GCs have a reward chart, clearly displayed with chore and star value. So the more difficult the job the more stars they earn. These are then converted into cash. I think for the very little ones it is 10pence per star, but more for the older ones.

Not here either. Same as @BeyondMyWits , everyone gets a monthly allowance depending on age, and everyone contributes to jobs that need doing around the house.

Loads of families do this, so it’s probably come from peers.

Hell would freeze over before I paid my child to function as an age appropriate member of her household. You live here, you pitch in. She does get pocket money but it’s to really separate to my expectation that she’ll participate in domestic life.

Mine have to do things, laundry in the basket, stack dishwasher, hang towels up after shower. I don't pay them for that. They get pocket money for fun stuff. Or crap, depending on you view it.

Agree, chores are part of family life and contributing. No payment. Pocket money is a choice and for their spending and learning.

no pocketmoney for basic chores, but yes to bonus ones.

so making bed? no.
brushing teeth? no.
putting plate in sink? no.

but yes to e.g. helping to clean the car. or helping to move boxes or something.

Yeah my DC a similar age gets extra pocket money 'top ups' for additional chores like emptying the dishwasher. But it's like 10p a time (we negotiate on a job basis) basic pocket money is 50p a week

My family did it when we were children and I've done it with my own children. It's worked well for us. Some jobs are expected, others are paid for. It's helped both generations develop good money sense.

I give mine a set pocket money and between 50p and £1 for chores help. Chores help include a couple of hours gardening, cooking or dusting and hoovering. Some chores like putting their swim stuff in the washing machine, laying table, clearing plates, emptying dishwasher, tidy bedroom, helping with recycling bags do not warrant money. Crap behaviour warrants a deduction but that only happened once. At 6 I think £1/£1.50 is average. Let her know what you expect her to buy from that. Mine are expected to contribute to Christmas presents but really save and spend their money on toys and teddies.

Thank you all so much for your responses! I spent days trying to figure out how to respond to your messages as I haven't been in the platform in a long time! I felt really silly when I found it in the right corner of my bottom icons

FYI, I went a bit down the rabbit hole in my research and I realised that unlike here where most people seem to agree that children shouldn't be paid for chores, other groups are a bit more divided on this.

Some have allowances without tying it to chores whilst others reward chores with points. Of the ones that gave allowances, some insisted that their DCs split allowances up into 3 - a third for keeps to buy whatever they want, a third for savings, and a third for charity. I think I kinda like this splitting idea because it establishes that children need to be responsible in the home and chip in by doing chores without expecting rewards; and when they receive any money, it's not for them to go out and splash on the next new toy.

Thanks again ladies!