How does 50/50 residence work in regards to costs

[OneForTheRoadThen]

My ex and I are separating (not married) and trying to work out residence area gents for our children.

One of the issues that I'm not sure about is childcare costs. Our 3 year old goes to nursery for 3 days a week while we both work. Under the current plan we're discussing one of those days every other week would be her dad's day but how would I ensure that he pays for the childcare this day? Currently I'm paying everything as he has cancelled his childcare vouchers and the fees come out of my account.

How would this work when our 5 year old needs 3 days care in the school holidays (same pattern so every other Tuesday would be their dad's responsibility) how would I manage to ensure that he pays equally for them? He doesn't want to and says I can claim back universal credit for 85% of the costs but I will still be left with the other costs. I don't understand how with a 50\50 arrangement a parent can be made to pay 50/50 costs. Could anyone help please?

Universal credit pays up to 85%. The childcare element is paid as another element of Uc and the whole award is reduced by wages.
Not sure what the answer is but he sounds tight.

Yes he is babyroobs which is why I'm not sure about how I can ensure that he pays half of the costs towards the children. I'm not sure there is a way other than trust and it would leave me in a very financially vulnerable situation.

@OneForTheRoadThen

Yes he is babyroobs which is why I'm not sure about how I can ensure that he pays half of the costs towards the children. I'm not sure there is a way other than trust and it would leave me in a very financially vulnerable situation.

Can the Nursery bill him directly for his share?

You can't is there short answer. He won't be compelled to. I'd go for EOW weekend and one night in the week and get the CMS payment. At least that way you get some help.

@BittyBatHats

You can't is there short answer. He won't be compelled to. I'd go for EOW weekend and one night in the week and get the CMS payment. At least that way you get some help.

Yes exactly. With 50:50 my understanding is that neither has to pay CM as you both have equal opportunity to work, but if you were to have them the majority of the time he would have to pay CM.

I'd say the cost of childcare should be shared 50/50 regardless of how many days and whose days they are. But minus the amount of the subsidy.

@Viviennemary

I'd say the cost of childcare should be shared 50/50 regardless of how many days and whose days they are. But minus the amount of the subsidy.

Yes exactly and if op wants to work full time which she may need to at some point, that will incur more childcare costs. With the 50:50 arrangement he is benefitting by op being home more with the kids and therefore childcare being less.

@BittyBatHats

You can't is there short answer. He won't be compelled to. I'd go for EOW weekend and one night in the week and get the CMS payment. At least that way you get some help.

Yes we also looked at 60/40 but he won't be able to afford the maintenance payment ( I do know this for a fact as I know his wages and his costs). So he wants to do this but not pay any maintenance. I just don't know what to do really. One one hand I want him to be able to afford to be able to provide the children with a decent life while they are with him but on the other hand it seems that I will be enabling this and relying on a benefit top up until my youngest is at school to enable him not to pay.

You could perhaps let him claim the child benefit for one child and if he is on a low enough wage to claim Universal credit himself with one child on the claim then that would be completely fair. There is no way around the childcare costs issue though because the childcare is only mainly for one child so someone would need to claim the childcare costs on their claim. Is he going to have rent to pay also ?

Babyroobs he doesn't qualify for any universal credit (although I do). He wants me to use this to pay for all the childcare. If he claimed for one child he would be massively better off than I would be while only having them 40% of the time.

So he doesn’t want to pay maintenance but doesn’t want to pay childcare and other costs too.
Hmm well that’s really not possible is it?

@Berthatydfil

So he doesn’t want to pay maintenance but doesn’t want to pay childcare and other costs too. Hmm well that’s really not possible is it?

I think he thinks that it's unfair that I will be able to afford to cover all these bills as I'll be getting a UC top up until I get a full time job when my youngest starts school (I currently work 3 days). He thinks if I can cover them and still have a little left over as disposable income then he shouldn't have to have no disposable income as he earns too much for a UC top up.

Bollocks. You watch. He'll have a new partner and new baby within 2 years. Don't agree to this. He made them he can support them. 50:50 can be really hard on the kids and it means him buying a second set of everything unless you're happy for your set to go into the abyss. Don't cheat your kids out of money their owed because your ex is crying poor.

@BittyBatHats

Bollocks. You watch. He'll have a new partner and new baby within 2 years. Don't agree to this. He made them he can support them. 50:50 can be really hard on the kids and it means him buying a second set of everything unless you're happy for your set to go into the abyss. Don't cheat your kids out of money their owed because your ex is crying poor.

This is my worry. I don't think he will have any more kids ( he struggles with ours) but I expect him to get a new partner ASAP. As soon as that happens I'll be going down the CMS route if he still is reluctant to pay anything.