If you feel comfortably off why is that?

[Smarshian]

I have recently received some inheritance, which has reduced our mortgage payments for now. Alongside this I have a new job which has meant a bit of a pay rise and in September our childcare bill will go from around 1150 a month to around 300 a month, which will obviously make a huge difference to us.
I went to buy a bottle of wine yesterday from the shop and instead of buying the cheap one we usually get I bought one for around £10, which I prefer. Not extortionate by any stretch but I just realised I didn’t HAVE to get the cheaper one this week.
What makes you feel comfortable?

I no longer have to worry about petrol, shopping, bills etc.
We are by no means well off but we can afford all the day to day items.
I remember when I was younger and had to walk around the supermarket mentally adding everything up incase I didn't have enough money, literally searching for money for a pint of milk, could only afford to put £10 in the car at one go etc.
It massively helps that our children are older and as we have gotten older our salaries have gone up.

Ends meet most months. We don't have credit card debts (we don't even have credit cards).

We own (with a mortgage) rather than rent. We can afford nice days out (remember those?) and run two cars.

We earn probably about average for the UK so definitely wouldn't be considered well off however, we live in one of the cheapest parts of the country meaning our income goes a lot further than it might elsewhere.
For me feeling comfortable most stands out when there are unexpected expenses.
I'm grateful that the washing machine breaking or extra MOT expenses are an annoyance rather than a disaster.
(Though both in one month was pushing it a bit, thanks January!)

Not running out of money at end of month, having a buffer for emergencies, able to afford treats.

The frustrating thing was I'd just got the stage of being able to treat ourselves more, buy theatre tickets etc when COVID kicked off!

not having to check my account balance before buying anything (i mean from supermarkets/coffees out and about/days out etc not huge purchases)

If something goes wrong with my house or car I can afford to fix it without relying on credit.
I don't have to really worry about how much I am spending on things like food.
I don't rely on the income of a partner for any of this which to me is the biggest thing.

It a combination. First having enough put by to to afford our mortage, utilities, council tax and food for a good while if we end up redundant or long term sick. Not forever, but enough time to do things like sell and downsize to a cheaper area and reduce lots of costs and find new jobd. That takes away the gnawing insecurity that ive had at other times in my life.
The second is comfortable to me isnt perfection or luxury or enjoyment. Its just the opposite of uncomfortable. So warm, dry and well fed are key to feeling comfortable. Then more nebulous feeling safe.

A few months ago we had a really expensive month - the boiler went, two tax bills due, and I had to pay ££££ for a citizenship application. We got to the end of the month and realised that although we didn’t have any money to save, we’d also covered those payments without difficulty. It was a real “Wow, we’re ok” moment, because I can think back to a time when just one of those things would’ve meant a loan/overdraft.

For the first time in years I have money in my account at the end of the month and I'm able to save.

I am also able to buy a few guilt-free unnecessary things for myself each month (books, baking kits) which I've not been able to do for a really long time.

It's also amazing to be able to say 'yes' to the children sometimes when they ask for things.

Being able to do the supermarket shop without calculating how much it'll be.
Student loan paid off. No credit card debt. We have savings.
Can afford nice holidays. We don't need to worry if the boiler breaks down or anything like that.
We have do have a big mortgage though.

The fact that I don’t worry if we have an unforeseen expense like a new tyre for the car or something. And the fact that I am not waiting for payday

Being able to go to the supermarket, and just fill my trolley without any worry and knowing that no matter what the total was my card wouldn't get declined.
I didn't realise that not everybody could do this (naive of me I know) until I went shopping with a friend who had her phone out the whole time keeping track of what she was spending.

Because there has always been more money than month.

I have definitely not always had more money than month and have just come out of a very very tight period, in which I took a pay drop in order to get a bit of work:life balance.
My recent promotion has helped massively and we can suddenly just breathe every month.
It is such a relief to not be watching EVERY penny. I wasn’t even aware I was worried about it before, to that extent.

I think like pp said it's about sudden expenses like the boiler going or car failing the MOT being annoying rather than needing to take out credit to cover it. For us it's not worrying about it too much if I want to buy something, or like someone said upthread being able to say yes to the children asking for something (whether they get it or not depends on lots of things but money isn't the overriding factor.)

I think if you have never had to struggle to make ends meet, you don't appreciate just how blissful it is to be able to buy the £10 bottle of wine, or to buy a new pair of trainers just because you like the look of them.

I have had to struggle in the past and now I don't. I think when I see people say they struggle to make ends meet despite having huge salaries they are either monumentally crap with money or else they really have no idea what struggling to make ends meet actually means in reality.

I am grateful every day that I can go to the supermarket and buy whatever food I want. Or I can put the heat on when I am cold.

Not living in my overdraft. They were shit days. .

Paid off mortgage.
Have no other debt.
Income easily covers reasonable day to day expenses (but not a lavish lifestyle!)
Pension fund which will provide for a comfortable retirement in about 7-10 years.
Kids got an inheritance which means that we won't have to use our pension savings for house deposits etc.

No debt, other than mortgage (which we're overpaying).

Over a year of DH's gross salary in savings.

Me not having to work and being able to choose to be a SAHM for a few years.

Not having to worry when unexpected expenses crop up or do things like add up grocery shopping as I go along.

Being able to afford to have private medical and dental insurance for us and the children.

Not actually noticing where in the month we are with respect to 'is it nearly payday yet?'

I've been on the other side of it too. I feel very fortunate. We do budget carefully and are not spendthrifts (we both drive old cars for example and don't have extravagant or expensive holidays). We're late thirties.

I could point to nice luxuries like holidays, or having a good pension.

But the things which really make me feel well off are:

• not stoping to think how much money I have before I go shopping, or suggest a takeaway (I actually run my account to zero every month because I transfer to savings on payday - but I know there’s not drama if I go into my overdraft, and it’s only in the last week I might)

• being able to put my car in for its MOT and not worry what the bill will be. (or panic if the washing machine makes an odd noise, etc) Sure, I haven’t got money to burn - but I know I have savings that will cover that kind of unexpected cost.

I feel very fortunate.

Because I can always make more money. I’m lucky enough to be healthy at the moment so it’s a very simple equation. Work more - earn more. So if the finances are suffering or inadequate- I earn more money until they are better.

Having enough in the bank each month to pay for everything and not have to save up for things we want. Having enough spending money and money for savings. Not having to worry if your card will be declined, I still get a wave of panic sometimes in shops even though I’ve had enough in the bank for years now.

For me, it’s being able to buy outright things that need replacing...and that includes a car (talking a £10k 3 year old car not a a £40k new one)

It’s also being able to say ‘yes please’ without having to really give it thought, when friends ask me to go out for a meal or on a day trip.

It’s knowing that if there’s a vet bill, or the boiler breaks and needs replacing, it’s fine.

These things count for a lot of peace of mind. Plus they also mean that I can buy outright rather than on instalment plans (such as car finance or boiler recover) which tend to be more expensive over time.

The other thing is having secure jobs. Nothing is ever totally secure, but some jobs are pretty secure, and that steady flow of income is very reassuring too, and a luxury I know lots of people don’t have. I’m very grateful.

Going from being single and knowing if I lost my job, I wouldn't be able to pay the bills. To meeting and moving in with partner. Just having that second wage as back up is a huge comfort.

PrivateParty, yes you’re right about being part of a couple. Knowing that someone else is bringing in money and it’s not all on just you makes a massive difference.

Being in a secure relationship with someone who is financially responsible makes a huge difference. Lots of people are on their own (obviously can still be financially secure) and lots of people have partners that make everything financial difficult - whether that’s running up big debts, being selfish with their spending, not wanting to earn if they can do so, or simply having very different priorities. All that stuff can be exhausting and make people feel on edge rather than comfortable about money.