How do you split?

[jollybobs89]

Just wondering how everyone splits there household income?

Currently a SAHM used to work full time have a 2 year old DD and a 6 month old on maternity was working full time then dropped to 3 days a week. Partner works full time decent job at the moment little ones still at nursery 2 days a week as not much help. So my maternity covers nursery and my bills such as car insurance etc x partner quite generous with money will give me when needed most of the time for stuff for the children or if stuff needed like hairdressers or someone's birthday.

I just currently don't like the feeling of feeling like a kept woman! Might sound stupid I know. If I ask for money he'll be like well what did you do with XYZ etc the same argument. I've mentioned a joint account he earns quite a bit more than me and he's said no not until I go back to work full time (think he said this in jest) but just wondering how everyone else splits? We aren't married we have a joint account well an account in my name for the bills and he pays the mortgage I pay for car insurance fuel nursery etc.

All joint bills come out of a joint account. We move a set amount in each month (i pay 60% of bills, him 40%) and we keep rest of our own salaries for personal bills, spending and saving.

While you are on msternity you should have access to joint money, what was the agreed plan when you got pregnant?

Nothing agreed as such just that I could ask for money when needed etc x it's just not nice having to ask feel like we needed to change the dynamic

You need to split according to earnings OP. It’s the fairest way.

So is your partner expecting you to go back to work full time quite soon? Would part time not be better?

We put everything in a joint account. Im a SAHP atm, so DH pays for everything. We each have our own account with some savings from before we were married, but ever since we got married and had kids we put everything on one account. Its mostly DHs money anyways, because always earned much more than me and ive been a SAHM for 6 years now.
Im actually starting work again in Nov and DH said to just keep the wage from that on my private account, because its only 1 day a week at the start, so wont be earning much. We will probably use that money for a holiday or something one day.

I’m a sahm. We’ve two joint accounts, all money goes in one joint account where the bills get paid out of, then the monthly spending money goes into the joint account which we both spend from. As of next payday we’ll have spending money transferred into our own current account so we can track our spending on stuff for ourselves better, or save it if we wish too. This will be for stuff purely for ourselves, not family related in any way.

I hate the idea of having to ask for money, and although I’m not in paid employment I do bloody work! I don’t feel like I’m a kept woman, my going back to work would cost us more as a family (we’ve DTs) so this is it for now. When I go back to work once the free hours kick in then I’ll pay my wages into the joint account too.

Exactly the same as LazyPuppy. Me 60, him 40 and maintain the rest in our own accounts.

I'm a sahm and my husband is the only earner in our house, we have 2 preschoolers. His salary goes into a joint account which all our joint bills and savings come from. Our personal spends get transferred each month from the joint to our personal accounts which is our own money to use for whatever we want, so we each have equal spending money and neither of us have to ask for money or justify what we are buying. Works well for us.

I’m currently on mat leave and earning nothing. When I return to work I’ll be on around half OH’s salary. Here’s what we do:

Joint account. Salaries paid in. All expenses paid out.

It’s very simple and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

I’m a SAHM. We get equal ‘fun money’ to spend how we please. We have a budget for all other expenses that come out of the shared account (obv DH is the only one paying in).

You should be ‘asking for money’. Just work out what you’ve got coming in as a family and how to best spend it. If you don’t want to have shared finances (seeing DP and not DH and ‘asking for money sounds like you don’t), then just tell him to set up a DD to cover nursery fees. That will free up a bit for you to spend on yourself.

*shouldn’t be ‘asking for money’

One current account which all money goes in and out of. Joint savings account.

So when your earnings fall in relation to his, because you’re looking after HIS children, you’re ok with that?
You’re ok that men earn more than women so you get to split bills equal to earnings?

Sounds like he does see you as a team, more of a cost centre. What happened to all that I have a share with you? I bet he’d hold you to in sickness and in health.

He’s being a tight cunt. Feel free to sacrifice your future for this one.

DOESN’T see you as a team.

We have completely joint finances. Everything in one pot, equal access to this pot and all financial decisions and plans made jointly.

We've had periods where I've worked full time and dh has been a sahp, and periods where I've been a sahm/worked part time/full time. One of us earns 3 times what the other does, but we're a team so we see the money we each earn as joint money. I find it difficult to understand how you couples can function as an equal partnership without joint finances tbh.

Is he being overprotective with his money because he doesn't agree with most of your maternity pay going in two nursery day for your eldest?

@dontdisturbmenow no that's not the case, I don't want to take her out of nursery to only put her back when I'm back at work, plus right now it's good for her which we both agree on.

We spoke about it briefly last night and discussed a joint account as I said I don't like having to ask for money. He did say he was happy for a joint account but think may come to some sort of arrangement as I think in relation to buying each other gifts and stuff it's nice to have your own account for that.

I think he's probably worried that I'm a bit of a spender and he's a saver haha

I work part time DH works full time. We don't have a joint account but split bills between us in a way that once all bills are paid we each have the same amount of disposable income. We each put a bit away in savings and then everything else is ours. If we need something big (for example we need a dehumidifier for our bedroom at the moment, we will each give a portion of our disposable income to that). I pay considerably less in bills than DH as I earn less.

I think he's probably worried that I'm a bit of a spender and he's a saver haha

We have the joint account but our ‘fun money’ goes into our personal accounts so it’s my own problem if I blow all of it at the start of the month and can’t afford a manicure for 3 weeks.

The joint account is for bills and groceries etc not randomly spending on whatever and we respect that arrangement. If either of us feels that they want to spend £££ on house stuff, we run it past each other first.

So it doesn’t matter if you’re a saver or spender.

That's fair enough. The fairest arrangement is a joint account of which all bills are paid off and the rest seperated in two that goes in individual account so that you can do what you want with that part.

If you spend more than he agrees on the kids, agree what is reasonable to come out of the joint account and you pay the rest from your disposable income.

You also need to start serious discussions about expectations after the end of your maternity cover if indeed he thinks you ok vbe back full time it FT when they are both at nursery/school.

We both work full time on similar amounts. So we have the "house account" we put the same amount in each month and that's rent, bills, going to the cinema etc. Then we each keep the rest. We have separate savings account currently but we're getting married next year so we were discussing changing that to a shared saving for house renovations and emergencies and then personal savings for misc things e.g. if I want to buy myself a new computer game or if he wants 3D printer stuff.