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Original poster

Child maintenance when child goes to university

35 replies

DumpedByText · 20/06/2020 09:49

Looking for advice for my partner please.

His daughter (18) starts uni in September and is going into halls around 60 miles away, so has living costs. He's been paying for her through A levels as required.

He thought he had to continue paying as she's still in education, but a friend has said not. Before he broaches this with his ex he wants to double check this is right, he's a great dad and wants to do the right thing.

He's going to give the money to his daughter directly now to help her through uni but wants to get his facts straight before telling her.

OP posts:
NoHardSell · 20/06/2020 09:54

First of all it depends on his divorce agreement, which might say he pays through university as well

Then it depends on him and his ex. Yes, his daughter gets part of her living expenses as a loan. If she doesn't get the full amount then parents are expected to make up the difference but it isn't compulsory. If she comes home, who is covering her food costs then? Again, something to discuss. Some people charge, others cover it from their salaries.

chocolatesaltyballs22 · 20/06/2020 09:57

My husband doesn't pay maintenance for his son who is now at uni. He helps him out with living costs instead.

Isleepinahedgefund · 20/06/2020 10:00

He's not obliged to pay maintenance to her mother when she's at uni as she's not counted as a child anymore. CMS jurisdiction ends on the 31st aug after a levels - presumably that will be this August.

I imagine the money will be very helpful to his daughter at uni - hopefully will help her not come out of it with a ridiculous amount of debt!

CupcakesK · 20/06/2020 10:02

I believe that for actual cms then you stop paying when the child leaves A level education. So if still in A level studies past 18 then you pay, but if going to uni you don’t pay. But as pp stated, it is expected that both parents will top up the student loan (pay directly to dc) for their living costs while at uni. However, it is slightly more complex as the level of loan they will receive is only based on the household income of the main residential parent (not both parents income), so takes into account step parents income (if there is one).

Babyroobs · 20/06/2020 11:45

depending on his ex's earnings/ household income she may be getting a full student loan so may not need it. We pay our son's accommodation at Uni each month because he can't get a full loan because of our earnings. I don't think your partner has an obligation to pay throughout Uni but it will depend if she can't manage, whether she has a part time job etc.

Bollss · 20/06/2020 11:46

You don't have to pay maintenance for adults at university. However it's quite expensive so contributing directly to his daughter is likely the best thing to do if he can afford to do that.

Tatty101 · 20/06/2020 12:01

Not mandatory I believe. I'm not 100% clear on whether your DP intends to stop paying all together or whether he wants to give to the daughter - I'd strongly suggest the latter. Uni is expensive and parenting doesn't finish once they head off to Uni

titchy · 20/06/2020 12:08

The three of them need to sit down and agree what sort of lifestyle they're going to fund her. If she's getting the full loan for example and planning on learning how to budget sensibly, then her father swanning in and giving her and extra £1000 (or whatever) a month isn't going to be terribly helpful in developing her budgeting skills. So he shouldn't be 'telling her' at all. Communicate!

Herbie0987 · 20/06/2020 12:14

My ex agreed to pay maintenance whilst child in full time education. The money was used to pay for uni accommodation.

CayrolBaaaskin · 20/06/2020 12:23

Your ex is legally obliged to financially support a child in full time education when they are under 25. CMS no longer has jurisdiction but the child could apply to the court (I knew people at uni who had done this). He should pay but perfectly acceptable to pay directly to child.

CayrolBaaaskin · 20/06/2020 12:25

And it is “mandatory” to support children in full time education. But of course there are many deadbeat dads (and mums) who don’t. Don’t let your dp be one of them.

Bollss · 20/06/2020 12:26

but the child could apply to the court (I knew people at uni who had done this)

Really? I know lots of people who's parents havent paid them through uni because they just can't afford to.... None of them would have dreamed of taking their mum and dad to court! Seems a bit entitled to me actually!

Mum45678 · 20/06/2020 12:40

My parenting agreement with my ex husband states that he will give maintenance directly to our two children until the end of their first uni degree. I think it would be unfair for one parent to absolve themselves of the financial responsibility because they have reached adulthood because we all know studying / living independently is tough. My ex said during mediation that he thought I might have met someone else by then and therefore the responsibility would not be his Hmm.

I would suggest he check the agreement OP. Even if there is no obligation, doing the right thing would be continuing to support his child if he is able.

Original poster
DumpedByText · 20/06/2020 16:59

Thanks everyone, there is no agreement in the divorce for uni etc.

He's more than happy to discuss things with his ex and he's certainly not a 'deadbeat' dad.

He's happy to give his DD help through uni and he can afford it.

OP posts:
Thisismytimetoshine · 20/06/2020 17:14

@CayrolBaaaskin

Your ex is legally obliged to financially support a child in full time education when they are under 25. CMS no longer has jurisdiction but the child could apply to the court (I knew people at uni who had done this). He should pay but perfectly acceptable to pay directly to child.
How could this possibly be the case? Nobody is obliged to support their adult children, (25!), don't be so bloody silly.
user1487194234 · 20/06/2020 20:26

Depends on divorce settlement but best if they have a discussion between the parents and the young person
Ideally he should be paying his fair share of uni costs direct to his DD

Lockdownsucks · 21/06/2020 16:33

My dad isnt helping my sister through uni, her mum is having to pay it all herself so my sister doesnt finish uni in loads of debt so its definately not compulsary, good on your OH for wanting to help his daughter through uni!

CatToddlerUprising · 21/06/2020 16:37

If due to parental income your step daughter would not receive full loans/grants then I think it would be fair for the mum and dad to split the difference.

Thisismytimetoshine · 21/06/2020 16:38

Absolutely fair. But to suggest it's a legal obligation is a nonsense.

Comefromaway · 21/06/2020 16:42

Her maintenance grant will be based on your income assuming you are the resident parent. So legally, unless the divorce settlement says otherwise, he doesn’t have to pay.

Morally he should contribute but it would be reasonable for any contribution to go direct to her.

Lostmyshityear9 · 22/06/2020 14:42

How could this possibly be the case? Nobody is obliged to support their adult children, (25!), don't be so bloody silly

An adult child can take a parent to court for university maintenance costs. Perfectly possible.

Thisismytimetoshine · 22/06/2020 14:45

Anybody can sue anyone else, it's one of the benefits of living in a democracy. The likelihood of winning is approximately zero.

Mrskeats · 22/06/2020 14:45

In most divorces child maintenance stops at 18 unless it's specified to be an older age.
My and my ex paid the rent for our daughters through uni between us.

Toomboom · 22/06/2020 14:54

Full time education is classed as school/ college up to 19 years old

Further education is university. Maintenance is classed as paying whilst in full time education. This stops once the child reaches the end of school / college. This normally coincides when child benefit stops.

Morally, if they can afford it still, they should carry on paying something towards the now adult child if they aren't working. After all this young person is still their child.
Been through this with my ex. He stopped paying as soon as our child did his A levels. According to him that is when his liability stops, no matter how that would affect his child.

user1487194234 · 22/06/2020 19:45

How could this possibly be the case? Nobody is obliged to support their adult children, (25!), don't be so bloody silly
What kind of person doesn't support their kids through Uni to the best of their ability

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